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Caitlyn Darrow



 
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Werewolf
Black Beast
Born: July 26, 2010 Forum Topics Started: 7
Race: Werewolf Forum Posts / Replies: 20
Affiliation: Arcadia Mail Replies Sent: 14645
Home City: London Mail Sent: 109731
In Union With: Lloyd R Darrow Last Login:
Currently Online:
10/18/17 at 2:07 am
No
Current Mood: Exanimate 
Quote:
Arcadia Members
Connor Silverman, Julliet Swan, Khloe, Lloyd R Darrow, Tucker Reid, Dovima Bastet, - Kronos -, Jane Darrow
 
Special Items:
 Minion Horde Raiding Party Leader
Have you seen my Minion Raiding Party?
My Minion Raiding Party kicked your butt
I love my Minion Raiding Party, but not all at once
My Minion Raiding party broke your nose
My Minion Raiding Party can beat up your Minion Raiding Party
My Minion Raiding Party won't come back
My Minion Raiding Party stole all my clothes
Official John Doe Fanclub Member
I survived the great Bloodout of 2011...with only minor withdrawal symptoms
Ruby hilted Sword commemorating the Bloodletting 5 Year Anniversary
Dracula spiked the punch at my Halloween costume bash, 2011
Dracula the Snowman brought me some Holiday Cheer - Christmas 2011
Zeddicus Zorander fooled me again on April Fools 2012
Limited Edition Zeddicus Zorander Trading Card for 6 Year Anniversary
I visited the Realm Haunted House on Halloween 2012 and an Elder took all my candy!
I roamed the realm on Christmas Day 2012
Best Werewolf 2012
Best Video 2012
Best RP October 2013
Winter Bloodies 2013 - Most Improved Writer
Winter Bloodies 2013 - Best RPM
Summer Bloodies 2014 - Friendliest Character
Summer Bloodies 2014 - Most Improved Writer
Summer Bloodies 2014 - Most Adored
Black Masquerade ~ 2014 Participant
Winter Bloodies 2014 ~ Best Sanctuary
Winter Bloodies 2014 ~ Best Crew
Winter Bloodies 2014 ~ Best Werewolf
Winter Bloodies 2014 ~ Best Overall Character
Winter Bloodies 2014 ~ Friendliest Character
Winter Bloodies 2014 ~ Most Helpful
Winter Bloodies 2014 ~ Most Adored
I roamed the realm on Christmas Day 2015
My heart grew 3 sizes for Christmas 2015
Savage Secret Santa - Christmas 2016
Funniest Costume ~ Masquerade 2016
Most Creative Costume ~ Masquerade 2016
Hard boiled eggs that smell like Dracula - Easter 2017
2017 Summer Bloodies - Best Werewolf
2017 Summer Bloodies - Friendliest Character
2017 Summer Bloodies - Most Helpful
2017 Summer Bloodies - Most Adored
2017 Summer Bloodies - Sexiest Woman
Best RP August 2017


Caitlyn Darrow's Biography


Mordred has just transfered $2,500.00 to your bank account. Reason: OJ money.
Amaterasu of Trikru has just transferred $1,000.00 in Blood Money to your bank account. Reason: WORLDS LARGEST GLASS OF OJ




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Lloyd R Darrow
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Last five threads posted in:
ForumSubjectLast Post
LondonNo sleep 'til London.
Created by Lloyd R Darrow
10/18/17
Realm🍎 Apple is the new Orange. 🍊
Created by Caitlyn Darrow
10/08/17
NeighborhoodThe Facility
Created by Zeddicus Zorander
10/06/17
RealmAll we have to do is dream.
Created by Caitlyn Darrow
10/06/17
Game IdeasViral Undead -- answered
Created by Elouise Orlav
09/21/17
Elis Griffyn 10/17/17 Practising his sleight of hand, Elis slips his wallet from the inside of his jacket into the front of his jeans, deep into his underwear. Convinced to its security within his, ahem, nether regions, he holds out his arms and wiggles his fingers.

"C'mere, you."
Elis Griffyn 10/17/17 Ugh. A woman crying? Errr...

"You...need a hug?"
Elis Griffyn 10/16/17

HaHA! My years in the Chamberlain's Men pay off. You fool, you fell for my wicked acting skills.
Camille Hammond 10/16/17 She's almost gone deaf, honestly, when she picks up the phone and brings it to her ear. Camille is always excited to hear from Cait, so of course she'd worn a grin from ear to ear. But now, with the high pitched shrieking, Cami senses that something is, well... off. Obviously..

"Cait? CAAAAAAAAAIT!" She has to scream in order to garner her friends attention. "What the fvck are you on about!?"
Elis Griffyn 10/16/17 I needed that! Ugh! My life!

Camille Hammond 10/15/17 Cait
Then we bring them to an AA meeting so they learn how to use them properly!!
Camille Hammond 10/15/17 Cait
I don't know??? Do we really use AA's very often? .. Do you think there will be free food? If there's free food I'm definitely going.
Camille Hammond 10/15/17 Cait
Um... Acronyms and Abbreviations? 🤷‍
Dovima Bastet 10/11/17 Heard you like oranges. Made these for you!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/09/17 Cait
No, I'm just trying to give you something you'll appreciate.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/08/17 Cait
I'll take that as a maybe.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/08/17 Cait
I keep trying to get you the perfect present.
How do you feel about severed heads?
Lloyd R Darrow 10/08/17 Cait
That is such an enticing offer...
You can have Netflix if you promise not to talk.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/08/17 Cait
You can have Netflix when I have my progeny.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/08/17 Cait
Why? Interested in making #3?
Lloyd R Darrow 10/03/17
Okay..
Lloyd R Darrow 10/03/17
Lloyd R Darrow 10/03/17 -smirks-
Oh, I know. I've got good genes.
-beckons over with a finger-
Which is why we should put them to good use.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/03/17 You're the sexiest thing I've ever seen.
-tries to wink-
-isn't good at emotions-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/03/17
Jackson McCarthy 10/02/17 Cait
lol yas! So glad ;)
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 You can have all the trophies you want.
-boops her nose-
It may degrade the meaning, but I'll install some shelves.
-squints-
Red wine. Grape juice for the boys.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 -slides into kitchen-
You didn't burn it!
-soft chuckle-
Should I get you a trophy made
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
If you cook, I'll eat.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
I'll check him out.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
I love you, too.
Yes, Henry and I were friends.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
I don't have emotions.
Those questions are all invalid.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
I didn't say I was mad?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
Fine.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
Yes, I did.
I'll smile once a day if you don't talk to him anymore.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/30/17 Cait
You knew Henry Ballentine?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/29/17 Cait
[video rec'd]

Impossible. I'm already here!
Lloyd R Darrow 09/29/17 Cait
[video rec'd]

Are you coming to the gym, or what?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/28/17 Caitlyn
I'll have my secretary schedule a fake meeting.
That's what I have Dummy clients for.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/28/17 Caitlyn
No, but I can be home in fifteen minutes.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/28/17 Caitlyn
I'd prefer if you came and spent some extra attention on me at present.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/28/17 Caitlyn
Dr. Phil is a tool.
Jackson McCarthy 09/28/17
Cait
Orange? Orange who?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/27/17 All the text meant, simply, was that he was working from home. Still, his very poor sleuth of a wife tracks him down, not that his his heightened sense hadn't already detected her. He set the documents previously in his hands aside just as she collided with him, eliciting a solid 'oof' from his lips. "Hello, darling." He would reply, his tone and mood always steady and calm. Almost unemotional. "I can certainly do my best if you want brownies. If all else fails, we can eat the batter."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/27/17 Caitlyn
I'm not going into the office today.
And Desperate Housewives is the only good show.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/27/17 Caitlyn
You haven't come to bother me today.
Is everything okay?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/26/17 Caitlyn
Are you angry with me?
- Kronos - 09/25/17 Caitlyn
I WILL EAT YOU FIRST.
- Kronos - 09/25/17 Caitlyn
YES GUNS.
I already bought them. Might as well get some use out of them.
- Kronos - 09/25/17 Caitlyn
I bought AK-47s and 9mm handguns for everybody in the Sanctuary.
No need to thank me, I am only doing my job to help protect our home.
I will be delivering them door to door, personally.
Except to Lloyd. His mustache disturbs me.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/25/17 Caitlyn
I'm on my way home.
Why would you come to my office?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/25/17 Caitlyn
God Christ. I do not dress like a clown.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/25/17 Caitlyn
You should watch a trailer for 'IT'.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/25/17 Cait
What would you like to do on Wednesday?
Sixeriosix 09/24/17 Six had kept an eye open for possible customers of discerning tastes. Stepping around a corner, the giant offered a deep bow and held out a black card with silver lettering. "Should you ever find yourself in the Tokyo area on business, do stop by, Milady. I'm sure you would appreciate the quality." With no more than that, the massive butler strode away, making sure his tie was straight.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/24/17 "Watch me do it? No Caitlyn. That's.. I'm not going to do that. You don't want to see it. I can promise you that." His grip on her momentarily tightened, his own shame causing his muscles to tense up. Verdant eyes shut tightly once again. He knew honesty was the only solution, now. "If I left, Caitlyn, because I ever thought myself capable of hurting our family.. It's doubtful I'd return." The words were terse are they forced themselves from his lips.

"Jameson knew, I presume he was the only one outside of my family. Elouise assured me all the files were destroyed before she escaped, but I can't trust a promise from her." Once again, as he gradually calmed down, his eyes reopened to look upon Caitlyn, head shaking gently.

"The drive within me.. It's linked to my lycanthropy. The beast dominates my conscious, every so often. It's a powerful force, too powerful to ignore. And if I ignore it long enough.. Scary things start to happen."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/24/17 He wanted to laugh, but he felt it inappropriate, given the topic of conversation. "It's not so cut and dry, darling. I hunt only those who are truly despicable. Do you understand? You're not even close. You and the boys are a better testament for humanity than anyone else I know. You, Caitlyn, are nothing like the people I kill." His words seemed oddly romantic, because, for Lloyd, they were. However absolutely absurd that sounded.

"You, and Noah, and Rigsby, you will never be harmed by me. And if I ever felt I was a danger to the three of you, I would leave." His throat clenched at the very thought, but it needed to be said. He'd come to the edge so many times, always in a deadlock with his beast that suicide often seemed the best route out. There was a time he had hoped Doctor Orlav would have been able to treat him, but those days were long gone. Moscow had felt like his last hope.

"Jameson Orlav, before whatever mess he got himself into, brought me into The Order for very specific reasons. It had nothing to do with the legal work I performed, Cait. It had everything to do with my genetic make-up. To distinguish man from beast, and potentially cure my lycanthropy." He sucked in a calming breath, leaning into Caitlyn's touch.

"I'm doing everything I can. That's a promise."
- Kronos - 09/24/17 Caitlyn
Why not?
Guns are your friends.
Each one of mine have a name and a fond memory.
Skullcracker, Widowmaker, Easy Divorce, Chad.
All great names.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/24/17 "My love for you and the boys has always been sincere. I'm capable of many things, but pretending to love you any less than I do just isnt possible." Lloyd's eyes finally opened, a pang in his chest nearly winding him as he watched her process. "I know I should have been honest with you. But how could I have been? You started all of this, and I was too afraid to ruin it." He drew in a shallow breath, his inner-beast commanding violence, action. It wanted blood. But Lloyd would satiate its eternal hunger.

"I hunt people who murder others.. Who rape, and abuse. People not worthy of decent society." He understood the hypocrisy. He knew he was just as unfit. But he had forced himself to make his public life decent. He wanted to be the man that Caitlyn deserved, and selfishly, knowing he wasn't, he hid his true nature. "You have to understand, I would never hurt you or the boys. The three of you are my world. What keeps me sane."

Knowing he had no right, but insisting anyway, he reached out, bloodied palm attempting to grasp at her wrist. "I love you, and I always have. And when I thought you were happy with someone else, I stepped aside, because I knew I was never worthy of this sort of comfort. I'm sorry, Caitlyn. And I'll go if you ask."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/23/17 "Abandon my family? You always know when I leave, and I always come back. Would you prefer something happen? Prefer I hurt you? Or the boys? It's a delicate balance within this body. You understand your own beast, the way I know mine." Lloyd recoils as she steps closer, his skin hot to the touch. "Jane knows the rules." His frustration, his own insecurities and fears of her presence were emotions she was still ignorant to. He was an excellent fabricator, after all. He had kept the ruse up the entire length of their relationship. But, perhaps after Rouen, something in Lloyd had snapped. His last shred of decency had died with Rena Chaussepied.

"You shouldn't want a child with me." He replied in an even tone,nails digging so deeply into his palms they nicked and drew blood. "We're all the same. My father, Jane, Freddie, all of us. Margaret, no doubt, will grow up to be just like her mother, and there's nothing I can do to help her. There's no guiding this. There isn't any fixing the breed that we are." Bile rose in his throat, but he fought it back down as he finally looked upon her, a deep shame clouding his eyes.

"What if I told you I was a killer? And that I enjoyed it? That's what's key. I like it. And I'm never going to stop. If I don't feed the beast, you can't even pretend to imagine what will happen." Lloyd's eyes squeezed shut, breath shallow, haphazard. "This is me. And I'm never going to change. But when I'm here, I'm present, and I'm with you and the boys, and it's safe. And I only kill people who deserve it." Mostly. Unless innocent people got in the way.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/23/17 "Good Christ, Caitlyn. What do you want from me? I didn't create Jane. I try, actively, every waking minute, to make sure I don't lose the parts of me that you love. It's easy to live like Jane does. It's a very simple choice. I can't apologize enough, but her being my kin is out of my control. I'm sorry, Caitlyn, truly. I know that I disappear. But you wouldn't love me if you knew half of what I am." He could feel the dam starting to crack under the pressure of her investigation. He wanted to break, to flood her with the truth of his life. But he couldn't. Selfishly, he wouldn't sacrifice her.

"I don't know what sort of man you expect me to be. But I'm not Dane, or Drake. I'm not going to disappear without a trace. What else do I have to do to prove I'm committed to you? Do you want a child, Caitlyn? Do you want me to erect a goddamn statue in your honor? Tell me what you want from me, so I can stop playing catch-up for once."
- Kronos - 09/23/17 Caitlyn
This building needs more guns.
And swords.
And beer.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/23/17 "Do you actually think that of me?" He inquired, visibly offended as he took his phone and drew back from her. He can feel the angry heat of his own beast rearing its ugly head. "I don't know what the magic words are, to finally drill into your mind that I'm not going anywhere, but I seem to be missing them. I can't have this fight with you, Caitlyn." His hands find his car keys which had been set aside on the counter in between them.

"I'm not having an affair, physically, emotionally, or in any other possible sense of the term. I have no interest in anyone but you. But this isn't my fight anymore, Cait. I told you, and you don't trust me. And, believe me. I understand how incensed I'd be if some other man sent me a racy picture of you. But I didn't delete a single email or text message. It's all there, whether or not you believe me is your problem. When you can get a level head about this, we can discuss it as the married couple that used to trust one another. I have enough to deal with when it comes to Jane. I don't need to come home and perpetually be on the defense with you as well." The man stood back, breath heavy with the frustration of his tone.

"I'll take the boys out for a few hours. When you want to have a sensible conversation, understanding that I do, in fact, love you, you can call me."
Ella Donovan 09/23/17 To:cdarrow@arcadia.gov
Fr:e.donovan@valarmorghulis.org
Subject: Re:Re:Drinks

Maybe, you should ask Lloyd.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/23/17 The man reached for her phone, verdant eyes squinted in frustration as he read over the email. "Honestly, darling, I don't know what to tell you. She and I were friends, if that. I can give you my phone, if you honestly don't believe me." And, in an act of total transparency, he did indeed slide his phone across the counter towards her.

"She pressed her luck with Jameson Orlav, too. Perhaps she has a thing for married men. I don't know her intentions, Caitlyn, because I know mine. I have zero interest in any other women. Period. Would you like me to speak with her? I'm happy to inform her just how incredibly inappropriate such an email is."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/23/17 Lloyd didn't bother to reply. Instead, he grabbed his keys and left the office without further hesitation. He wasn't going to have that conversation over text. It left so much to be desired in terms of explanation. And truthfully, Lloyd didn't have one. How on earth had the woman gotten a picture of him shirtless? He wasn't sure.

So, after biding a patient ride home, Lloyd entered the house quietly. And, following the scent of burnt popcorn, discovered Caitlyn in the kitchen. "Ella is a friend, to put it politely. As for the picture, I have no explanation. I've never knowingly been shirtless in front of her. We worked in The Order together, and that's and the limit of our personal and professional relationship. Okay?"
Lloyd R Darrow 09/23/17 In the middle of reviewing a few files, Lloyd paused when Caitlyn's name flashed across the screen. Scooping up the phone, he tapped away a response before returning to his work.

Cait
I'm at the office. Is everything okay?
I can be home in 20 minutes.
Ella Donovan 09/23/17 To: cdarrow@arcadia.gov
Fr: e.donovan@valarmorghulis.org
Subject: Drinks

Handsome. When are we going to get together for drinks again? I'm holding this picture hostage until you succumb. ;)

[pic attachment]


-Ella
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 Crooked.. spaceships?
-confused-
-shrugs-
Whatever you want to watch. Your choice.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 -grabs her hand-
-knits brow-
Damn it, Caitlyn, I'm not going anywhere.
-sighs-
And I am happy. Don't be silly. Are you?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 Why would I need cheering up? I'm never cheerful to begin with.
-narrows eyes-
Is something else the matter?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 -groans-
Cait, what the hell? Throw those away!
-snatches baggie away-
Do I have to chaperon you, now?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 -tilts glasses-
There's no such thing as a 'banana nut'.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 "He isn't coming, because he doesn't know Jane is here." He emphasized, brow raised to implore the hint. "No one does. And I want to keep it that way. I don't know what sort of trouble Jane is it, but it doesn't need to go further than Arcadia." He let out a short sigh, deflating as her hands overtook his.

"I think it's a conversation better had for when the sun is in the sky. Don't you?" He obliged, happy to lead her towards much needed rest. "I won't let Jane disrupt anything else. She's going to behave, or she isn't allowed to stay. She knows the rules."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 "Freddie is not joining." He was the first to admit, with both siblings in town, the pack mentality was almost impossible to resist. Lloyd Darrow became an entirely difference person when surrounded by his family. Hedonism, both in human and wolf form, became the prime mode of operation. It was entirely unlike his normal behavior.

Of course, it was a side to him he never wished Caitlyn or the boys to be exposed to. "Wishful thinking. I raised Margaret for three years. Jane didn't even call on her birthday." He replied with a bite to his tone, hands wringing together in muted frustration. "It's loyalty that leaves me cleaning up her messes. The image of the family. That's all that truly matters, at the end of the day."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 "I would never allow her to harm the boys. She isn't allowed near them. I can't tell if she's still using, or not. But you know my rule. Why do you think Margaret stays with my parents? Jane is a loose cannon. She always has been. It's in her nature." Lloyd, of all people, hated making excuses for his kin's conduct. However, he of all people understood the particular breed of lycanthrope that Jane was. They shared DNA, after all. He sympathized with the brutal, sociopathic nature she too struggled to keep at bay.

Though it seemed with time, her sense of morality had faded. Lloyd's.. struggled. It depended on the scenario. "You don't need to be kind to her. You don't have to like her. That will never be a requirement." He hooked an arm around her waist, drawing her nearer to his person.

"As for Hitler.. perhaps it's best if I let the documentary educate you, alright? We'll watch it tomorrow over a bottle or two of wine."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 "Jane isn't allowed in the house. I wouldn't expose you to that much of her." He replied, reluctance in his tone. "She's my sister, Caitlyn. I don't know what you'd prefer I do, but I can't leave her on the street. For her to come crawling for help.. I can only presume it's serious."

He took a step back, a hand cast idly at the television. "No Desperate Housewives. Just a bit of the History Network. Something about Hitler. Reminded me of Mrs. Orlav." He offered a quick-witted grin, feet carrying him to collect her luggage and set it upright.

There was an air of trepidation in his actions. A quiet, apologetic way, formerly fluid movements filled only with hesitation and reproach. "I have to take care of her. You understand that, don't you?"
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 "Careful, I just..." Lloyd watched as the suitcase slid across the floor. ".. waxed that. Hello." The man smiled, sliding over in his house slippers to plant an affirming kiss on her forehead. "Missed you." He would murmur in his gentle and reserved manner, expression as unassuming as it usually was.

He would lean in, another kiss being given to Rigsby this time, while his hand ruffled the hair atop Noah's head. "Happy to have you all back home. It was a lonely few days."
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 Cait
I got antsy and cleaned the house. And the car. And the yard. All of it.
I also pressed your pajamas. See you soon. Love you.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/22/17 Cait
I get agitated when you and the boys aren't nearby.
I'm a grump.
I don't know where she hid the gun.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/21/17 Cait
Pillow Cait is just a pillow. My wife is a different story.
My wife, I happen to miss.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/21/17 Cait
I signed the birth certificate.
I know his legal name.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/21/17 Cait
Rigsby the dog, or Rigsby the child with the unfortunate name?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/21/17 Cait
He's a dog. I'd assume as much.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/16/17 Cait
Come home please. :(
Lloyd R Darrow 09/16/17 Cait
Who am I supposed to spoon?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/16/17 Cait
She's stealing my three favorite people. Why would I like her?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/16/17 Caitlyn
I don't like Julliet.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/15/17 Cait
Don't go to Julliet's. I promise Jane isn't going to be an issue. If Jane is going to be the reason I'm sleeping alone at night, you know I'll hang her out with the laundry.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/15/17 Cait
You didn't tell me that. Why wouldn't you mention that to me?
She's not going to further be a problem. I don't know what's wrong this time, Cait, but Jane doesn't ask for my help often. I have to.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/15/17 Cait
Don't be dramatic. I'm handling her. She doesn't have anywhere else to go, and she's my family. I deal with your psychotic sister.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/15/17 Cait
Jane is coming to stay for a while.
Jane Darrow 09/14/17 Her sister-in-law launches at her like a wolf on springs. Jane scrambles to side step, but is caught by her side and tackled to the ground. The gun still in her hand, she reels her arm back and swings forward as hard as she can. While she hopes to make contact with the side of Cait's head, there's no telling if the blow would land among the shuffle.

"Get off of me you cow!" Jane shrieks, "I don't know how my brother manages your fat ass. I swear to God the next time he see's you he'll be fishing your body out of the river!"
Julliet Swan 09/12/17
Of course he'll be fine! We can still watch him...
That's what peripheral vision is for.
*starts pouring generous helpings for the both of us*
Julliet Swan 09/12/17
Well, fine.
I'll get a head start then.
*fetches Jack*
Y'know, maybe if we rub some of this on his gums, he'll fall asleep faster.
*smirk*
Julliet Swan 09/12/17 *eyes beam*
Okay! But do we have to wait til nighttime?
I mean, we're adults.. and I'm ready now..
*disregards morning time*
Camille Hammond 09/12/17 [Facetime Call: 1:09]

It's okay. Been kind of crazy since you left, actually. It's weird not having you here. I've never had to watch the kids without you!
Camille Hammond 09/11/17 [Incoming Facetime Call. .. ...]

Hi Cait! I miss you. How is London?
Lloyd R Darrow 09/07/17 Cait
Jane is back in London. I don't know if she's still using. Just stay away, okay? I'll handle my sister.
Jane Darrow 09/07/17
Lloyd R Darrow 09/05/17 Cait
I'll pour the wine.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/05/17 Cait
I want to lighten your load.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/05/17 Cait
I'll help you with whatever you need.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/05/17 Cait
You left your phone unlocked! I saw it all!
You don't need to do anything to make me stay. I'm not going anywhere.
Lloyd R Darrow 09/05/17 Cait
STOP telling people I'm leaving you!
Elouise Orlav 09/05/17 Caitlyn
Wolverine isn't coming!
Elouise Orlav 09/04/17 Caitlyn
On my way to London biiiiish.
Lucius Dalca 09/04/17 Text: Caitlyn
That is awesome to hear! I am doing very well myself :) I am getting adjusted to a new chapter of my life. That reminds me, you and the boys wanna catch some pizza again let me know.
Lucius Dalca 09/03/17 Text: Caitlyn
Welcome back then! Hows the kids?
Camille Hammond 09/03/17 unknown sender
I'm in the house. Find me quick, or I'll eat all of the oranges!
Lucius Dalca 09/03/17 Text: Caitlyn
Hey! Long time no see, its Lucius. The guy you went to pizza with the kids a couple of months back. I hear you moved into London and started a sanctuary. That is great to hear, I just wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood. London is a great city.
Camille Hammond 09/03/17 unknown sender
Hello Caitlyn, do you want to play a game?
Jackson McCarthy 09/01/17 Cait
Who's there? *suspicious look*
Lloyd R Darrow 09/01/17 That backfired.
-droops brow-
No number three, now!
-shakes fist at-
Camille Hammond 09/01/17 Caitboo
No! It's what you were born in.. nothing! Nakey-mess! Omg. Who is trying to get you into a birthday suit?!
- Kronos - 09/01/17 "The same reason you enjoy the grotesque citrus abomination that are oranges. She just does for some sick reason...I must find her. Remain vigilante."
- Kronos - 09/01/17 "She wishes to bring the world into eternal struggle and consumes the anger and anguish of man. So...-"
- Kronos - 08/31/17 "Ares. My ex wife. God of War. She is within the walls.I sense her."
Lloyd R Darrow 08/31/17 Cait
Or we could just go ahead and have that third child.
Atticus Hammond 08/31/17 Caitlyn
I'd say yes to the ball pit. Try some self-ignition fireworks. Anything thrill-seeking.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/31/17 Cait
You know the three of you are what I live for. You're why I work so hard.
I'll take some time off now that we're back in London.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/31/17 Cait
You can't tell, but that text made me quite sad.
Do we need some special family time?
Atticus Hammond 08/31/17 Caitlyn
Do you need my help? I've been to a few bachelorette parties myself.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/31/17 Cait
I will never divorce you. Don't be silly.
Atticus Hammond 08/31/17 Caitlyn
No. Not the TV show. She said she wanted a bachelorette party, and I'm trying to make my wife happy. This is Atticus, by the way.
- Kronos - 08/31/17

-eye twitches-
Atticus Hammond 08/31/17 Caitlyn
Oh, good! Will you help me throw her a bachelorette party?
Atticus Hammond 08/31/17 Caitlyn?
You're Camille's friend, right?
Tucker Reid 08/31/17 There's a mysterious chanting coming from the foyer. Tucker is properly confused. There are no ceremonies or visitors scheduled for today, and right now he's in the middle of clean up from his breakfast. Cooking an omelet in the kitchen of a funeral home is every bit as odd as you might suspect.

FUNNEL CAKES. What? What the-


"Hello?" Tucker peeks from around the corner, a white towel rolling over the water droplets left on his hands. As he steps out, he eyes over the woman with her bright red hair and matching child. "Can I help you?"
Khloe 08/31/17 "CAAAAAIIIIIT!!!!"
-gives one armed hug-
-must save the frappuccinos-
"Who else is here? Anyone I know?"
Khloe 08/31/17 "It's your bestest friend in the whole wide world and I brought.... orange mocha frappuccinos!"
- Kronos - 08/30/17
"...Woman, we gonna fight."
- Kronos - 08/30/17 "I feel you have done this only to scorn me but, I must ask...why do we only have oranges in the kitchen? I demand green apples to be a regularly supplied, woman!"
Christine Nightshade 08/30/17 Congratulations on your new endeavors
Khloe 08/30/17 -knocks-
"Helloooo? Let me iiiiinnnnn!"
Jace Remington 08/30/17 Jace skips toward his wifey, whistling off tune and without a care in the world. He likes to be spontaneous 99.9% of the time because it throws most people off. He also like pouncing his blonde sociopath of a mate equally.

She's wearing a hat today. Unusual but not unheard of.

Grinning to himself, Jace wraps one arm around her waist and one around her shoulders, dipping her back, movie style. "Hello wifey," he waggles his brows and gives her a good ol' smooch.

Then freezes.

He pulls back and looks at her. Wisps of red hair peek out from under the hat. "NOT WIFEY."

In a panic, he nearly drops Cait, but recovers with admirable grace, and brings her back upright. He smooths the fabric of her clothing over her shoulders. "Say... let's keep this between us. I'd like to keep my biscuits. It's been a while... have breakfast with me? Extra big glass of OJ, my treat."
- Kronos - 08/29/17 A snort escaped the man. "No need to concern yourself. I am sure the grumpy old man will find me before I do him."The woman was as spacey as ever. One would have a hard time imagining in such a small, spastic being there was a strength the likes of which none had seen. Kronos had doubted her once. Never again. The ache of his back and tarnished pride after their first fighting match had forever haunted his memories.

A brow lifted in surprise at the woman's statement. A new child. A weak laugh escaped the man's lips. He truly had been away too long. "I...well, died. I was resident in Hades' Underworld for what felt like a millennia then... here I was. I haven't a clue as to how I returned but my strength is not what it once was." The man sounded more disappointed than upset in the situation. Years of training, rigorous regimens that most would not dare attempt, erased in the matter of minutes. His fists began to ball tightly until his knuckles were white, his jaw clenching with his frustration. "I will regain it, however. That much is sure."
Lloyd R Darrow 08/29/17 -pats head-
Let's go get some ice cream.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/29/17 -rolls eyes-
Yes. This is my dream. To be back in London
-cheek kiss-
A gold suit? Just for me? You're too good to me.
Tucker Reid 08/29/17 Thanks for the room. Given the opportunity to choose, I'll always pick London over Africa. The air is so dry there. Although I spend more time in L.A. than anything, sooooo...
Lloyd R Darrow 08/29/17 What? That was a compliment!
-all irritable-
This is why I only talk to the baby.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/29/17 Camille said to compliment your robes, so..
-tilts sunglasses-
Damn, woman.
Julliet Swan 08/29/17 *tacklehugs*
*doesn't let go*
*...lets go after what seems like ages*
*whips out a bottle of Jack, followed by a bottle of orange juice*
Are ya ready for some shots with chasers?!
- Kronos - 08/28/17 As always, Kronos allowed the woman to enter his personal space with a usual groan of annoyance. What was with this woman an touching people? Her hands squished his grumpy features as she pleased while his eyes tried not to glare too hard at the woman. Despite his natural sh!tty demeanor he was relieved to see Caitlyn alive and well. And exactly the same.

Dark eyes furrowed in confusion. "Cat?" Before he could refute her statement an epiphany struck! The feline who held the same amount of anger towards the world as he did! The Grumpy Cat! "Oh, yes. That horribly ugly feline whom I both respected and loved... I do not know. I will need to seek him out. How is the child? Last I remember you had a boy?"
Castiel 08/27/17 "You forgot your pizza." *hands pizza* "The pizza man is very disappointed in you."
- Kronos - 08/27/17 It had been some time since Kronos last saw the woman he once called his leader. After the closing of Lune Mortelle, he had always made sure to stay in contact with the woman. Were they friends? The word was taboo to Kronos but allies was a better explanation of their relationship. Maybe she had forgotten him and their wars of the apples and oranges. Nonetheless, he would try.

"Caitlyn Noire... it has been some time."
Khloe 08/25/17 "Cait! Caaaaiiiiit! I made popcorn!"
-runs-
-trips-
-scrambles up-
"I'm okay. I'm good. Hi! I spilled the popcorn."
Atticus Hammond 08/23/17
Lloyd R Darrow 08/23/17 Cait
You're not the boss!
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 *light panic*
Let's not talk about my business trips. Work is for the weekdays.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 *shifty eyes*
The fangirls... Right.
*clears throat*
They went on vacation. Permanently.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 I don't need new friends. I have you.
*grumps*
I also don't like people. I thought that was rather obvious.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 *squints*
The lesbians are our friends. Camille is your friend. Hell, I don't care if Elouise Orlav is your friend. That seems like plenty of friends to me.
*folds arms*
Single men only want one thing. And for whatever reason, they're all good looking around here.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 Cait
Why do you need to be friends with handsome men?
Am I not good enough?
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 Cait
There's pizza for you too, goober.
Who's your new friend?
No single, handsome men.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 Cait
I already brought home pizza.
And the boys are watching Desperate Housewives with me.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/20/17 Cait
Come be my best friend.
Every day can be Wednesday.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/19/17 You're always the boss. You know that.
Camille Hammond 08/19/17 -tiptoes up behind-
-spooks-
CAITLYNFRANCISDARROW!
-beams-
I probably hired Lloyd to be our paper pusher. He's now officially on the payroll, which means you can boss him around and he can't sass you.
Happy un-birthday!
Lloyd R Darrow 08/15/17 He frowns, both of his arms moving to close around her midsection and hold her close against his chest. He presses a kiss to the top of her head, brow knitting as he considers what words will ease her worries. "Life offers no promises. You and I both know that. But I know you aren't going anywhere, anytime soon. After all, my plans never fail." He wears a teasing grin. "After all, I planned to have you, to marry you, and so far, everything has gone as planned. So don't dwell, darling. Just focus on what you can effect right now."
Lloyd R Darrow 08/15/17 The initial panic subsides. But he can't help but share in the disappointment she also failed to express. As she starts to separate from him, he reached out a hand, fingers closing gently around her wrist to draw her near once more. "Cait," He clears his throat, verdant eyes earnest. "Are you okay, love? It's okay to be upset. You can talk to me." He feels lost, like an abandoned puppy. Feelings simply weren't his forte. "Someday. Just not today, mm?"
Lloyd R Darrow 08/13/17 "Hey! Hi. Hey." He narrows his eyes, fingers curling to hold his hips. He appears more calm than his texts let on. Perhaps he has had some time to think. Lloyd, personally, is always calm in person. Cait would know the man rarely shows any emotion at all. "So? He stands from the couch, stepping carefully over towards her, as if she is fine china and he, a bull. "What's the verdict?"
Jameson Orlav 08/13/17
Lloyd R Darrow 08/13/17 Cait
OKAY.
I'm not panicking.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/13/17 Cait
I'll stop using caps.
I'm still freaking out.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/13/17 Cait
I'M NOT YELLING I'M FREAKING OUT.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/11/17 Caitlyn
WTF DO YOU MEAN SHOULD YOU TAKE A TEST?
I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THIS WAS A POSSIBILITY.
CAIT. W-T-F.
I need Desperate Housewives.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/11/17 Caitlyn
DIDN'T ADOPT. I'M NOT PREGNANT.
Are you?
Lloyd R Darrow 08/09/17 Cait
Speaking of babies...
;)
Lloyd R Darrow 08/08/17 -blinks-
Would you prefer having a hairy chest?
-clears throat-
I wouldn't.
Elouise Orlav 08/08/17 Caitlyn
Omg shhhh it's just a little fire. Nbd.
Julliet Swan 08/07/17 *leaves a cup of fresh squeezed orange juice on her desk*
*places a bright pink sticky note on cup, which reads:*
Thinking of you... and your babies.
Jules
Lloyd R Darrow 08/07/17
Lloyd R Darrow 08/05/17
Lloyd R Darrow 08/04/17 Cait
No. No Sir Mix Alot.
Any foreign film you want, as long as there's no singing.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/04/17 Cait
Let's watch Schindler's List.
Or a silent film.
Lloyd R Darrow 08/03/17 Cait
Whatever you want. Preferably not Moana?
Lloyd R Darrow 08/02/17 Caitlyn
I took the boys out for water ice.
Let's grab a bottle of wine from the rack and have a quiet night in.
Camille Hammond 07/19/17 -screechesandtackles-
-squeaky toy in one hand, bowl of mac n' cheese in the other-
-sowhat-
Lloyd R Darrow 07/09/17 -already loading a gun-
What's his name? I'll kill him.
-holsters gun, takes Rigsby-
Right after this guy calms down. Mm?
Lloyd R Darrow 07/08/17 Me, obviously.
-prods-
I'll buy you all the cheese you want.
Lloyd R Darrow 07/06/17 Cait
I'll be home tonight. Looking forward to seeing you and the boys. Love your 'face' as well. And the rest of you, goober.
Lloyd R Darrow 07/05/17 babe AF o m g
i 'm drunk. w/ sibs.
miss u qt ;)
Lloyd R Darrow 07/05/17 Cait

Or 5th. What day is it?
Julliet Swan 07/03/17 I dropped Jack.
Julliet Swan 06/23/17 *skips toward*
So where's my grand tour? Boss says that's your job.
*grins*
Lloyd R Darrow 06/23/17 Cait
Honeydew, who?
Julliet Swan 06/22/17 You were successful in stealing $4.00 from Caitlyn Darrow.

Sorry not sorry.
Lloyd R Darrow 06/21/17 Cait
Who's there?
Lloyd R Darrow 06/19/17 Cait
I love you.
Lloyd R Darrow 06/13/17 Cait
We are always on for date night.
Wherever you want to go.
Tell Julliet I expect you to be well taken care of.
Lloyd R Darrow 06/13/17 Caitlyn
No need for a sitter, I'm here.
Have fun tonight. I love you.
Julliet Swan 06/13/17
"So you're coming out with me tonight, right?"
Lloyd R Darrow 06/07/17 Cait
She stole my baby. I'm not sure I like her.
Lloyd R Darrow 06/07/17 Cait
+VID+

Lovely view, still not as lovely as you. Dinner, tonight?
Julliet Swan 06/07/17 Is your hubby cute? I'm sure that would hasten the getting along thing.
*smirks and giggles*
*shoves playfully*
Yes, yes, I needa see alla the family! Right away!
Julliet Swan 06/07/17 Rigsby.
Not a name that rolls of the drunken tongue easily...
And I was just being facetious with the sober thing.
I just thought it sounded mature.
Julliet Swan 06/07/17 *eyes light up*
More babies?! Yes! I'm an Auntie again??
*hugs tight and sways back and forth*
That's almost enough motivation to get sober.
Julliet Swan 06/07/17 Only time will tell... I'm a wanderin' fool these days.
*glances down at Cait's hand*
Missing things come with the territory of being gone, now don't they?
*offers a half-hearted smile*
Julliet Swan 06/07/17 That sounds right.
And I think I joined a traveling circus yesterday?
There was a pirate, and he was cute.
But he stole my Jack and well, that's a deal breaker.
Julliet Swan 06/07/17 *brushes face against*
*purrs*
Soleil Whitaker 06/06/17 Oh. Oh. Hi there!
-holds out hand for squeaky toy-
C'mon, love. Wanna fetch?
Soleil Whitaker 06/06/17 Rhiannon? Fishboy? What's with the squeaking?
Mountain View
Soleil Whitaker 06/06/17 Hello?
-looks around, puzzled-
Rhiannon Whitaker 06/05/17 No more free babysitting, then!
Rhiannon Whitaker 06/05/17 Don't tell my wife...
Lloyd R Darrow 05/29/17
Work will never hold me up again, Cait.. Where did you find that bottle? Behind the fridge? No. Let's stick to my beer.
Lloyd R Darrow 05/29/17
Tomorrow. But I'll hire a sitter for our Wednesday date, mm?
Lloyd R Darrow 05/29/17
Lloyd R Darrow 05/28/17 -blinks-
Is that even a question? Mike Delfino, obviously. Who is yours?
Lloyd R Darrow 05/28/17 -tosses popcorn into mouth-
What Bree always does. Outsmart the rest of them, and be fabulous in the process.
Lloyd R Darrow 05/28/17 Cait
I dropped the boys off with the Tiny Lesbian Friend.
Meet me in the living room in 15 for beer, popcorn and Desperate Housewives?
Soleil Whitaker 05/23/17 Caitlyn Darrow
Did you leave it here when you dropped the boys off a while ago?
I don't think I've seen a squeaky around lately. Let me ask Rhiannon!
Lloyd R Darrow 05/23/17 It was a surprisingly quiet Tuesday evening in the Darrow house, so quiet, in fact, Lloyd worried his family was not home. Pulling his key from the lock, he sets his bag aside in the foyer before venturing further in. “Caitlyn?” He calls out, almost immediately greeted thereafter with two exuberant dogs. So she must be home, then. “Cait?” He reattempts, kicking his shoes off and continuing the rest of the way in stocking feet.

Cait? Boys? I’m home.” It’s a more lackluster declaration this time, as he’s not entirely sure, even with the presence of the dogs, that any human is listening. With a shrug, he shuffles into the living room, flopping onto the sofa with ease.
W_Kat 05/19/17 Congrats on PotD!! :D
Castiel 05/18/17 No... I think that's the pizza man's job also.
Lucius Dalca 05/17/17 Lucius waited for her response for that long @ss minute of her staring blankly. There was something very off about that woman but nothing that really disturbed him like others would. "Ahhh...." He nodded when she finally spoke and gave her answer. It made more sense now what she meant. "That is fine with me. We can bring them food too."
Lucius Dalca 05/16/17 Lucius thinks about that.. He stole $110 but she stole almost $4k.. Would it really be considered her own money in that instance? He looked thoughtful then decided to just go with it.

"Sure?" Paused and had a '2 + 2 = 4?' moment, "How many kids do you have?!?!?"
Lucius Dalca 05/12/17 Lucius saw a small brunette he recognized from a couple of months back just walking normally about her day. He decided to approuch her behind her and just like that...
Lucius Dalca just stole $110.00 from you!

Quickly he turned around before she noticed but it was too late. ****! There goes Olive Garden tonight.
"So..... Dinners on you?"
Lloyd R Darrow 05/04/17 "I love you best of them all, Caitlyn Darrow." He leans over, pressing an affectionate kiss to her forehead as his fingers sift through her hair, pulling her in against his chest. "If you need me, then just text me. I may not be prompt.. But I will be here for you, always."
Lloyd R Darrow 05/04/17 "Trust me when I say she is single only in technicality. And for the record, I would never betray you. I was swamped with contract negotiations all day, and I stepped away for a few slices of sub-par pizza with a crew-mate. Don't be dramatic, Caitlyn. I love you.." His brow knits together, perplexed that his wife had extended so little trust and understanding towards him. He was certain he had proven time and time again, he was nothing like the men she had wasted her time with before. His loyalty could never possibly be questioned.

"A few weeks. I'll be with Freddy and Jane.. I'll be fine. I always come back, don't I?"
Lloyd R Darrow 05/04/17 Strolling over, Lloyd sifts through the tufts of Noah's unruly hair, stooping over to kiss him on the head and murmur a greeting before he toddles away. Left to face his wife, a smile struggled to form on his lips. "I wasn't on a date, Caitlyn. Do you truly think so little of me?" his arms fold, not in a defensive manner, but in a more casual sense. After all, her husband is perfectly calm in that moment, as he often is.

"You remember what we discussed, some months ago. When the itch to roam free returns. I believe it's time I take a step away, and return to my pack." It wasn't a threat, or an unkind or unloving gesture. It was simply an understanding between the pair. Lloyd was beginning to lose his touch, and they had both agreed should that come to pass, he would take the time he needed to regain his humanity.
Lloyd R Darrow 05/04/17 Wife
I'll be waiting.
Lloyd R Darrow 05/04/17 Wife
Are you still cross?
Come home so we can talk.
I never sleep well without you.
Lloyd R Darrow 05/04/17 Wife
Am I permitted in my own house now?
Autumn Dalca 05/04/17
Lloyd R Darrow 05/03/17 Caitlyn
Okay, I won't.
Lloyd R Darrow 05/03/17 Caitlyn
Not working, no.
I'm having a drink and a bite with Ms. Donovan.
No need to wait up. Love you.
Elouise Orlav 05/03/17
Sarah Remington 05/03/17 ...We share the same face, idiot.
Remi Rose 05/03/17
Noura Orlav 05/03/17 Well, right now you're scaring me...
Rhiannon Whitaker 05/03/17 Of course it's a yes! Just don't tell Soleil...
Soleil Whitaker 05/03/17 -blinks-
-clears throat-
... wow, yes. Don't tell Rhiannon.
Autumn Dalca 05/03/17 *raises brows to her hairline*
Short answer? Abso-f*cking-lutely.
Well done, gorgeous.
Rhiannon Whitaker 05/03/17 *sweating nervously*
MY WIFE AND I ARE HAPPILY MARRIED.
Caitlyn Darrow 05/02/17
Autumn Dalca 05/02/17
Vesper Vaughn 05/02/17
Nemesis Wolfe 04/30/17 You managed to break out Caitlyn Darrow.

"Stealing orange juice from the store again, Caitlyn??"
Lloyd R Darrow 04/28/17 Caitlyn
Whatever you want.
Now, go to sleep.
Aren't you jetlagged?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/28/17 Caitlyn
Sleep well.
Pancakes in the morning?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/28/17 Caitlyn
I'll be out late tonight.
I wouldn't bother waiting up.
Talk to you tomorrow.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/26/17 Caitlyn
+Image+

Happy Wednesday in paradise, Cait. I love you, too.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/26/17 -grumbles, gets up to help-
Every morning, I wake up and wonder how, of all the women in this planet, I ended up with the one who obsesses over oranges and chews squeaky toys like she's a dog.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/26/17 -considers helping-
-films instead-
Sorry, I cannot come out into the sun. The UV rays are killing me.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/25/17 Birthday Girl
Happy Birthday, love of my life.
I'm assuming you found the orange basket?
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/24/17 Caitlyn
Do you mean 'manta rays'?
Google says yes, there are manta rays in Bora Bora.
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/24/17 Caitlyn
Starfish?
I'd assume so. But I could be wrong.
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/24/17 Caitlyn
Alive is a strong word.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 Caitlyn
I don't think you'll be able to fit pool noodles on the plane.
Make sure you pack plenty of citrus snacks.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 Caitlyn
I love you.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 Caitlyn
Relax. They're not going to starve.
Just think about the beach, sans children!
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/23/17 *crying on the inside*
7am? Shouldn't be a problem.
*gently pushes*
Okay, go on!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 Caitlyn
No, I promise.
I don't need to get dragged off.
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/23/17 *wide eyes*
*nods slowly*
Right, seven days. Okay!
... Have fun?
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/23/17 *awkwardly pats*
You'll both be fine.
And if you're not, I promise not to cannibalize your children.
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/23/17 *tilts head*
No, he didn't mention it. It's... Not an issue. Soleil and I will take them, I suppose. Good practice?
*offers tissue*
Don't worry, they'll survive without you for a few days, mm?
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/23/17 *blank stare*
... What?
*blinks rapidly*
How long are you going to be gone?!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 Oh, hours ago. Get rid of them!
-clears throat-
I mean.. It will be hard to say goodbye for a week. I'm already tearing up at the prospect.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 .. They won't say no. I'll bribe them.
No price is too high.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 Just.. Leave them with them. Soleil said they're in New York. That's perfect!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 I'm not bringing 1 and 2 to make number 3.
Ditch the kids with the lesbians, and we can have a Caitlyn Jr.

-nods-
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17 I vote we dump them with Soleil and her wife.
You're the other one's boss, right? So just make her do it.
.. It should be fine.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17

-short sigh-
Yes, you can bring the squeaky toy. But only because it's your vacation as well.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17

Tomorrow. And how's the chin? Is the thing gone now?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/23/17

Yes, Bora Bora. I bought the plane tickets and booked the resort.
I don't think that she did. Did she? Should I go check a mirror?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/22/17
Do I.. Look different to you?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/22/17 Caitlyn
Bora Bora?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/16/17 Wife
Is that so?
I love you, and the boys. I hope my family isn't driving you too crazy.
I needed to make a quick store run, mother needed more butter. :)
Atom Noire 04/16/17 -Comes hopping by in a bunny suit with an orange tabby cat sidekick in his basket-
-hands his Auntie a basket full of oranges, chocolates, orange juice and stuffed rabbit-
"Happy Easter!
-Hops away to his next victim-
vamp_goku 04/16/17
Lloyd R Darrow 04/16/17 Cait
He can be gay if he wants. Freddy is.
Happy Easter! I'll be home soon-ish, I'm buying you loads of half-off chocolate.
Nemesis Wolfe 04/15/17  photo happy-easter-guys-look-what-i-found-at-the-store_c_3103785.jpg
Soleil Whitaker 04/13/17 -emerges from bathroom with Noah-
Caitlyn! You're here! It's a pleasure finally getting to meet you.
-sticks out hand-
I'm Soleil, Lloyd's friend. Rhiannon's wife. Your boys were great last night.
-gently pushes Noah forward-
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/13/17 You're my boss, so I'm not going to tell you you can't do anything, but I would strongly advise against stealing someone else's child. Imagine if I took Noah and Rigsby and never gave them back?
*folds arms across chest*
Lloyd isn't going to divorce you, unless of course you kidnap this baby. That may be a deal-breaker.
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/13/17 You cannot keep someone else's baby, Caitlyn.
*stern stare*
Where is Lloyd? Perhaps he should be assisting with this.
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/13/17 *blinks rapidly*
Relax. I will return this strange baby. I do not believe your husband will divorce you, he seems like a very kind, understanding man. Their bags are packed, they've been fed lunch, and they've even had a nap.You have nothing to worry about.
*silently vows never to have children*
Rhiannon Whitaker 04/13/17 *opens door slowly*
That... That is not Rigsby. This is Rigsby.
*hoists baby 'Lion King' style*
Did you steal someone's baby?!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/12/17 To: Cait
Re: SOS

Sorry, Cait. Got caught up at work. Did you wiggle your way out?

Ignore my mother, you're gorgeous just the way you are. I won't have time to stop at home and change before I drop the boys off. Can you grab a polo for me? Something in blue. I know you're going to bring an orange one, but I'm asking for blue.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/12/17 To: Cait
Re: SOS

That was probably on purpose. She says you need more rest, or the bags under your eyes will get darker.
Her words, not mine! Love you lots!
Soleil Whitaker 04/12/17 Caitlyn Darrow
Ah, I see. Well, it's always a pleasure having guests. And I'm sure the Darrows are wonderful people.
I will be wary of Jane, though. Thanks for the heads up.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/12/17 -snickers-
Right. Because she definitely made that soup on her own. And, trust me, she checked at least two extra suitcases just to bring all of the khaki.
Soleil Whitaker 04/12/17 Caitlyn Darrow
No problem at all! Very much looking forward to it.
Lloyd did not, however, mention that. Will we be hosting them as well? We can make dinner, Rhiannon's a phenomenal cook.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/12/17 -winces-
Yes, I know she did.. I'm still sorry for that.
-coughs into fist-
She was still a bit jet-lagged. At least she likes you, right? You passed her test with flying colors.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/11/17 -mock gasp-
Mrs. Darrow, you hide money from your own husband?!
-kisses cheek-
It's a secret, damn it. I don't want you whispering it in your sleep, or my parents might overhear. And we are not going on another bloody double date.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/11/17 -sees-
-swoons-
We're going rock climbing tomorrow! And in case I die, you get my cravat collection.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/06/17 I don't know. They don't invite me for 'guy stuff'..
-scuffs ground-
I don't know. Maybe? Mother wants to re-do the boy's wardrobes with khaki and redecorate the house. Please don't divorce me.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/06/17 -swallows in one bite-
-squints-
Typically? One or two..
-winces-
Months?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/06/17 -crashes out onto roof-
-waves Burberry bags at-
I bought you a coat. And a scarf. And a bag.
-kisses cheek-
You're a lifesaver.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/06/17 To: Cait
Subject: SOS

Help me. Mother is making me follow her and Jane around Burberry.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 -deadpans-
Oh good God.
-lowers voice-
You know what that means, don't you?
.. Mother's here.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 No! This isn't fun! This is survival!
-kisses face-
My family is insane. You've met them! You know! You know things!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 -slaps taco away-
-wraps around like snake-
No! No! You're innocent! You can't do drugs!
-starts to get weepy-
It's because I don't love you enough, isn't it?! That's why you're becoming a drug addict?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 No, not gardening. Just some.. Some..
-whispers in ear-
Mara-joo-ana. -horrifyingly innocent-
I don't know? Maybe? I'm too high for this. Can you even buy children?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 -gasps-
-uber incredulous-
I.. I most certainly do not!
-sputters-
Well. I believe her words exactly were 'I'll sell you Margaret for 10,000 dollars'. And then we shook on it!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 -shifty eyes-
Shh. It's a secret. Jane said I couldn't tell anyone.
But I had to tell my wife!

-may smell like weed-
She said if I give her 10,000 dollars, she'll make sure the baby is okay. Isn't that so nice of her?
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 Noooooope. Don't worry, I'll tell you!
-still grinning-
I'm.
-leans in-
Puh-reg-nant.
-nods seriously-
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 -leans on-
-may be snoring-
-suddenly wakes up-
Hm? What? Tacos? Tacos.
-beams at wife-
Guess what.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 -bleary eyed-
-squints-
.. Noah is in bed?
-grabs tacos, et. wife-
You look pretty.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 To: wife af
Re: ROOF

yes! come up. dancing. with talconel alcohol yes alcohol.
i miss u :)
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 To: hot wife hhahaha Re: drunk af

par-t with noah!
roo.fwrooof. ROOF. i'm on the roof!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/05/17 To: wksife wlpf wife yes wife
Subject: message please

party!!!! hi wife lov u! :)
Lloyd R Darrow 04/04/17 I disagree. You are the best Darrow I know. And you chose to be one, you insane woman.
-playfully bats nose-
Yes to the Wednesdays. And I wouldn't bother wasting the orange juice on them. The judgment is how they show they care, I think.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/03/17 -intense stare-
-scoffs-
No, Cait. My parents aren't big drinkers. They will keep the house clean, and watch the children, and walk the dogs, and spoil you. And then they will judge me, because I am the worst out of that entire group.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/03/17 We won't tell her.
-grins-
She's still going to try to kidnap them over Easter. Did I mention that my parents are coming for Easter? And that my siblings never booked return flights?
*deep breaths*
AlsoIloveyou.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/03/17 -tsk's-
We'll have to make it slightly dumb, so the others do not get jealous. But they already are of the other two Darrow children. Noah and Rigsby are redeemable step-children.
-firm nod-
Certainly khaki worthy!
Lloyd R Darrow 04/03/17 -crashes into room-
Three-month? Are you...?
-twitchy-
Yes. 3-year.
-grapples-
-ensnares in hug-
You were adorable.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/03/17 To: Cait
Subject: Cuteness

Guess who? Look at this adorable chap. Our 3-year plan baby is going to be genetically perfect.
[image attached]
Lloyd R Darrow 04/02/17 To: Cait
Re: Sally

No, Freddy did not eat the remote.
.. I did.
Lloyd R Darrow 04/01/17 To: Cait
Re: Sally

Sally who? I'm trying to re-tile the bathroom.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/31/17 No, our child is certainly better. Better looking. Talented. Charming. Like me.
You're a close third, though.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/31/17 That is largely debatable, my love.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/30/17 Is that even a question?
-rolls self up in blanket-
Me, my best friend, and... I suppose you'll be there as well.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/29/17 If we look pathetic enough, they might leave. Perhaps we could try crying as well?
-curls up on-
-most pathetic ever-
Noah laughed after he puked on me. He's a monster.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/29/17 -pokes head out from under blankets-
You came! You do love me!
-pathetic smile-
I've barricaded myself away from our lunatic family. Obviously.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/29/17 To: Cait
Re: Wednesday

Come hold me. I hid a bottle of wine under the sink. I'm too scarred to move.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/29/17 To: Cait
Subject: Wednesday

Freddy threw up on me.
So did Jane. And after Jane, the boys got sick.
Also on me. There are not enough showers to make me feel clean again.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/28/17 They're your dogs. That's probably why they're so unruly.
-grumbles-
But also cute.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/28/17 -moody-
-leans on-
I tried to make every day Wednesday, but Clark and Rigsby ate the flowers I bought you.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/27/17 To: Cait
Message:
What if all week was Wednesday?
Nemesis Wolfe 03/26/17 The air chilled her skin as she made her way to the doorstep of someone she once knew. Digging into her pocket she pulled out an envelope with nothing on it but a note containing inside "I am back....". She shoved it into the door frame and door before turning around and disappearing back from where she came.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/25/17 They don't wake up until the sun goes down. You know that!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/25/17
At least Jane and Freddy aren't here. One beer, just one, all to myself!
Atom Noire 03/23/17 "What?! Not fair! I'm a grown @ss man!"
-puffs out chest-
"Who is only, like, 6 years old..."
-deflates-
-hangs head-
"I'll go to my room."
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 -pauses-
-stares at-
.. You're lucky you're so cute.
Nathaniel Tallios 03/23/17 Hey you! Don't be hogging all the attention today now, okay?
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 Hold on.
-snoops on Snapchat-
Oh, no, wait. They're with the boys.
-squints, gasps-
THE BOYS ARE STILL AWAKE. THEY'RE WATCHING SAW WITH OUR CHILDREN.
Atom Noire 03/23/17 -comes running at-
"HE LIES, AUNT CAIT! YOUR HUSBAND LIES!"
-trips, falls for like the 50th time-
-flails on the ground like a helpless infant-
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 I love you, too. Sometimes.
-blinks-
Jane may be a horrible human being, but she wouldn't abandon the children. And if she does, Freddy's there. Unless he leaves them too. Oh Christ. The children are unsupervised.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 -pathetic-
He was violent! Vicious! A total animal!
-wounded bird persona-
.. Yes. Date night is back on.
-grabs, drags-
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 -shakes-
No! They're not taking the children. Relax. Also, your nephew keeps beating the sh*t out of me.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 I can promise you with a fair amount of certainty I will never willingly go out with the two of them. And neither will you.
-clears throat-
Andyesthey'llbestayingherepleasedon'tdivorceme.
-deep breathing-
vamp_goku 03/23/17







Congrats on POD!!
Raven Black 03/23/17 Congrats on POTD
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 -glowers-
-still moody-
Oh, yes, you mean the lovely note that said 'Suck it, b*tch' and a lewd drawing? I remember it well. I believe I hung it on the fridge next to Noah's drawings.
-relents, hugs-
Freddy gets in tomorrow. I think we'd best draw up the wills now.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 I was here! You weren't. I can't believe you went out on date night with the wrong Darrow.
-broods-
No, no date night. You can go out with Jane again.
-so wounded-
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 -rubs temples-
We're going to need to refinance the house, aren't we?
-narrows eyes-
You went out with Jane? Without me?! Was she nice? She didn't abandon you too, did she?
Penny Blackwell 03/23/17 Thank you. Very kind of you.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/23/17 Drunk enough that I think I'm seeing double of you. More like multiples, really.
-grabs at-
What did you do? Your face is everywhere!
W_Kat 03/23/17 Congrats on PotD Cait!!! *hands you some OJ*
Lloyd R Darrow 03/22/17 -squeezes-
-drunk, dead weight-
No. It was horrible. There was cheap vodka, and Jane, and not you! .. What if I'm too hungover for our Wednesday date?!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/22/17 -stumbles in-
-crashes into-
Good Christ. I thought I was going to die out there.
Soleil Whitaker 03/21/17 Caitlyn Darrow
If you'll have me, I might just take you up on that offer!
Lloyd speaks very highly of you, so it'd be a pleasure meeting you under other circumstances. haha.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/21/17 Text Reply:

Who? Solelil or jnaJane?
I ♥ Margaret. no more nieces or nephews.
Soleil Whitaker 03/21/17 Caitlyn Darrow
I just picked him up. He's safe!
Don't worry about gas money. Lloyd's always been nice to me, so it's the least I can do.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/21/17 Text Reply:

margaret needs a little brother or sister i guess ;)
WAIT. THAT;S MSISTER. she left me
sad lloyd.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/21/17 Text reply:

cait. i LOVE you. ur my snack.
is this how americans flirt?? lp;ve you.
jane just left with big russian man. wtf
Lloyd R Darrow 03/21/17 Text reply:

idk. what is a 'snack'? womn @ bar calld me snack. jane is flirting w/ brtendr. i am sca;red.
Soleil Whitaker 03/21/17 New Contact: Caitlyn Darrow
This is Soleil, I work with Lloyd. He's okay! Just a little drunk.
Don't worry, though! I think I'm going to pick him up. :)
Lloyd R Darrow 03/21/17 Text reply:

no. 10 yr plan. BABE. uBER pls pleaz send. osso drunk. how r Boys? Sleep time. sleepy. nd dogs? MISS YOU
Lloyd R Darrow 03/21/17 Text reply:
bab.e. Babe. yes, DUH;. ilovu. Where r you? jane says we should have a b]aby. yes? yes. call U B E R UBER uber. Uber.
Nathaniel Tallios 03/21/17 You know... it might not be such a bad idea if you're offering. Just better be aware that I won't take any responsibility if my parenting advice doesn't work for you.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/21/17 To: Cait
Subject: Visitor

Jane her.e. drunk. wHisley whisKEY. i lo;ve. you.
[IMG]
Elouise Orlav 03/20/17 ... I want one now.
-pouts-
Elouise Orlav 03/19/17 -fondles booty-
Aw shiz yeah. I'm getting so many chicken nuggets with this!
-waves at-
-scampers off-

You were successful in stealing $569.00 from Caitlyn Darrow.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/18/17 -squints-
-holds up a finger-
-leaves, returns with gun-
Mackenzie, you say? I hope she's bulletproof.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/17/17 Good God...
-grapples with-
-throws big whiny baby over shoulder-
Come on, grumpy. Let's ice your wounds.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/17/17 -pelts orange at-
WELL THEN HE SHOULDN'T BE SO SLOW!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/17/17 -runs past-
-trips Noah-
-throws banana peel at-
Have fun catching me now!
Mackenzie 03/17/17 -Smirks-
Yes. Yes, you should.
Shamrock is the new butterfly.
And you should get it right here.
-Pokes the middle of her chest-
Supersize that sh-t. Like America.
Mackenzie 03/17/17 You got a f-cking tattoo of a butterfly on Saint Patricks day and it's not green!?
-Frowns, judges silently-
...but your hair is red...
Lloyd R Darrow 03/17/17 That's because Clark is an idiot. He takes after my sister.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/17/17 -runs out-
-runs back in-
-somehow in gym clothes already-
Let's go, woman! We've got calories to burn!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/17/17 Why do you include orange in perfectly adequate recipes and pretend it's normal?
-flicks-
No, you may not. I'm a business professional. ... Just do not tell my mother.
Nathaniel Tallios 03/16/17 Oh you know, a little bit of this and that. Picked up bartending, fighting off the forces of evil, etc., etc.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/16/17 If you keep that thing, I'm telling everyone you have it.
-swats-
What sort of monster do you think I am? Rocky road, obviously. Or moose tracks. Never just vanilla.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/16/17 Ha! No, but I like it anyway.
-high-fives-
Next week we can get couple's tattoo removals.
-ruffles hair-
I only remember crying a little. I believe that warrants ice cream.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/16/17 No. Yours is a ...
-lifts back of her shirt-
-snorts-
It's a butterfly. Classic.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/16/17 -groans-
I vaguely remember couple's tramp stamps after the third bottle...
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17 Dancing?
-throws over shoulder-
To the club!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17 Everyone is with Claire! Don't worry, I'm sure she remembered to feed them all.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17
I've already had so much. Fine. More wine. There's a Cabernet in the kitchen that screams mediocre. Let's chug it and wake up with horrible headaches tomorrow. How does that sound?
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17
Really? You'll share? You do love me.
We can watch Ghostbusters, love. I'm happy to. And I'll make two bags of popcorn to be safe.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17
Ghostbusters? Again? ... Whatever you want, just so long as I get some of the popcorn this time.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17
Okay, psycho. Both. But only because it's Wednesday, and on Wednesday's Caitlyn gets whatever Caitlyn wants. Unless it's another puppy.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17
Come on, then! I'm assuming Claire will just keep them until we remember to pick them up. She's rather capable seeming. Yes to dessert before dinner. Ice cream, though, or orange sorbet? No, you may not have both. You get cranky when you have too much sugar.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/15/17
That it is. Do we watch The Bachelor finale before or after dinner?
Nathaniel Tallios 03/15/17 -is pelted by multiple oranges- Why hi there stranger!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/14/17
Woman, I would like to see you all try.
It's not like I ever get anything productive done. You or the dogs always end up interrupting me with something.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/14/17 -scoffs-
I wish you the best of luck in that endeavor.
-pats-
I will, however, inevitably outsmart you, and hold it over you for several days.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/14/17 You only married me for tax purposes?!
-offended-
And to think, I found a babysitter for our Wednesday night date.
-glowers-
I'll have to cancel the hot air balloon now.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/14/17 Did I? Sure, we can go with that.
-flicks-
I really only married you for your money.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/14/17 I underestimated your strangeness.
-squints-
Yes, that's it. Aren't you the lucky one?
Lloyd R Darrow 03/14/17 -squeezes-
You moved in without my permission, to be clear.
I believe it started when you started making me take selfies with you and Clark. You forced me to like you.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/14/17 Congratulations, you've known me for a year.
Now, it's up to you to guess how long I've had a crush on you. Good luck!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 I thought you were navigating...
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17
So glad we ditched the kids at that abandoned warehouse. How else would we be able to enjoy Sunday Funday?
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 -cheers-
To the television!
-lowers voice-
Sh*t. The kids are sleeping. I'll make the popcorn!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 I don't think Dr. Orlav is the sort of doctor that talks to other doctors.
-prods-
I don't get it. I've never seen Terminator. Do I need to watch the series to understand?
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 No, because they probably don't think anything they do is questionable.
-pauses-
Never. We want our kids to be normal. The Orlav baby is going to be the next Charles Manson.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 Sort of. I got caught in traffic on my way home from work, so I drank it in the taxi. I'll just use Postmates to go get more.
-scoops up-
In the mean time, we can go look-up child psychiatrists for our future, future horrible child, and then regular psychiatrists for you and I!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 -pauses-
Or, ten years, maybe. So I have time to prepare. Or die. Whichever happens first.
-pokes cheek-
For the record, I'm happy with the the boys, and the dogs, and you. I don't need a prostitute daughter, if that isn't the way things go. I'll still buy you orange juice and let you spoil The Bachelor for me.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 -panics-
NO. No new babies. ... Unless you're pregnant? Are you? I don't believe you.
-sniffs-
I guess you're not. At any rate, planning is a good thing. So we'll wait. Especially if this potential new child is a spawn of Satan himself, the boys need to be old enough to fend for their own in foster care once we're murdered.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/12/17 Now I don't know which I'd prefer.
-scoffs-
Absolutely not. Clark is a horrible name, for a horrible dog. Clearly, a name like Sparky or Fido would be more appropriate.
-toothy grin-
We have plenty of time to figure things out. Unless you're pregnant, and you just lied. ... Are you a liar?!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 -grabs at-
-squints-
You're an amazing mother. And she won't be a bully, because I'll kick her ass first. See? We'll be great parents to a little girl!
-suddenly horrified-
What if it's another boy? Can we even handle that?
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 -stops dry heaving-
-looks at-
You're not? Oh.
-scratches cheek-
Maybe, yeah. You mean, like... Half mine, half yours. A little Darrow?
-definitely not freaking out-
What if I'm worse with a girl? What if she ends up a stripper? Or a prostitute? It will be my fault!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 -glowers-
No. The other thing.
-hands on hips-
-intimidating stare-
That little tid-bit about a daughter. Well. A child. Care to elaborate? ... Are you pregnant? Is this a test?!
-starts to hyperventilate-
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 -tracks down-
-waves phone at-
Are you... Are we...? Is this a discussion?
-clears throat-
-chokes instead-
... I'll move the castle.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: Lego Lady
Re: My Toys

I keep the legos. I use them more than he does.
If we time it out correctly, we can raise kids until we die. And then we'll never have to be alone!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: Wife For Life
Re: Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder

I knew what was I was getting when I signed up for this. It's fine, I get my revenge. Years from now, when the boys try to date, I've a goldmine of horribly embarrassing photos in my arsenal.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: Cait
Re: Unfair

Why can't Noah have any? It's our annual Saturday night ritual. Fine, I'll watch him. But you have to make breakfast tomorrow morning.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: Cait
Re: Starvation

... So what if I am? I'm a growing boy.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: Sock Skank
Re: Eminent Domain

Nope, keeping them.
I suppose I could be persuaded, however...
I want a bucket of 100 buffalo wings.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 Princess Belle
Re: SOCKS 9-1-1

Obviously after the socks, woman! I'm a grown man, I can't take you out for fast food wearing your knee-high, fuzzy orange socks, no matter how comfortable they are. Also, they're mine now. I'm keeping them.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 Paula Abdul
Re: Smooth Moves

I can't help that I've got rhythm.
Maybe we should go dancing tonight.
Afterwards, we can share a milkshake and fries, because I'm a good husband.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: Dancing Queen
Re: Dance-Off

You? Dancing? Can I film it? Better yet, I'll live stream it.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 Sock Goddess
Re: Best Present Ever

You are fantastic, and I adore you. Can we get cheesecake after? My treat. Maybe even a trip to Orange Julius.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: Best Wife
Re: NEW SOCKS!!

Okay, no one needs to die. Can I go with you?? How many new pairs do I get? What colors? Can I get a pair with bulldogs on them?!
Lloyd R Darrow 03/11/17 To: #1 Wife
Subject: Today's Execution


Noah cut the toes out of all of my socks.
Would you like to help me construct the guillotine?
Castiel 03/09/17 "Yeah, my noodle... remembers everything. I think it´s a pretty good noodle."
Mackenzie 03/04/17 Caitlyn
Have you gone mad? The US president is a goddamn cheeto.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/03/17 Of course we can!
But I want the ping pong table. Non-negotiable.
Mackenzie 03/03/17 Caitlyn
Between us, I much prefer you to Cam.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/02/17
Is that so? Was it the bouncy house or the basket full of puppies that made last night a good Wednesday date?
Lloyd R Darrow 03/01/17 -swoops in-
... Orange you glad you said 'I do'?
It's Wednesday, so you know what that means.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/01/17 Reply To: Cait

Orange.
Lloyd R Darrow 03/01/17 Reply To: Cait

I'll throw some rocks at them.
Also. Knock knock.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/28/17 Reply To: Wife

Well, you definitely can't blame them on the dance moves part. We are incredible.
And, yes to the pizza. Start them young.
[VID]
Lloyd R Darrow 02/28/17 Reply To: Cait

Perhaps they have learned to admire you as I do.
Without them, we probably wouldn't have any home videos, though.
[VID]
Lloyd R Darrow 02/28/17 To: Cait
Subject: Dinner

I'm bringing home pizza for dinner. And before you ask, yes, I got orange slices instead of pineapple. And while I am disturbed by how successful the fan girls are at stalking us, some of the pictures and videos are nice.
[VID]
Elouise Orlav 02/27/17 What?!
... I feel totally misled.
-sidles off to find bacon-
Elouise Orlav 02/27/17 -grabs squeaky-
...your husband screwed up my taxes. And my screwed up, I mean he didn't do them. Isn't he an accountant?!
-throws toy down hall-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/27/17
Rhiannon Whitaker 02/23/17 Why would I buy products from child soldiers? Is this not a moral dilemma for you?
*shakes head*
I'll give them a try, but only to say I did so.
*ponders*
Oranges? Who doesn't like oranges? They're like biting into a smile.
Rhiannon Whitaker 02/23/17 Girl Scout Cookies?
*furrows brow*
Why do child soldiers sell cookies?
*shrugs*
Yes, you may have a cookie. But only one.
Rhiannon Whitaker 02/23/17 I suppose I haven't nailed down any specific categories.
*coughs*
Not children, though. Apparently that is frowned upon.
Rhiannon Whitaker 02/23/17 *clears throat*
That would depend. But I don't give out cookies to just anyone.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/23/17 I'm a responsible parent. I don't curse!
-covers Rigsby's ears-
Sh*t. Definitely sh*t.
Rhiannon Whitaker 02/22/17 *sniffs*
*tilts head*
Interesting. I thought gingers didn't have souls. Thank you for the welcome, nevertheless.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 ... Fine. But only because I want the pretzels.
-pokes cheek-
And you're such a good wife for volunteering to get all of the after-hour snacks!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 -snorts-
Bed time for you, maybe. I'm going to start that new lawyer show tonight.
-grapples-
Sleep is for the weak, and invalid, and boring. That's why the boys do it.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 -rolls eyes-
I love you too, loser. That's why I entertain this lunacy.
-leans over-
And, I'm easily convinced.
-kisses forehead-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 -heavy sigh-
-clears throat-
I am vengeance. I am the night.
... I.

-Bruce Wayne squint-
Am. Batman.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 -snorts-
-shoves-
Relax, Cait. The accent isn't going anywhere.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 -furrows brow-
-eerily accurate American accent-
Man stuff.
-chuckles-
Eating crayons, mostly.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 I'm the fun one, not the good one.
You're the better parent, you know that.

-gently pats-
You'll be the best damn waitress they've ever seen.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 Of course I am. I'm the fun one.
-shifty eyes-
Yes, I can be fun.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 Well, we are mates. So I let him do what he wants.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/21/17 Nothing, yet. But I don't trust that look in his eyes.
-squints at-
He's definitely plotting my demise.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/20/17 Well, that may very well be awhile. How about we just let him off with a warning? I don't want to wake up with my face covered in marker again.
-frowns-
... These children are tiny terrorists.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/19/17 -panics-
-runs back into the room with a bucket of Legos-
I feel like he would most certainly suffer psychological damage from this show. And he doesn't need any more excuses for screwing up my stuff. Did you know he cut all of my ties?
-hands on hips-
Little bugger. He's lucky he's cute, or I'd string him up by his toes.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/19/17 -disentangles-
No, no. You need to catch up. I have so many theories I want to discuss.
-pads into kitchen-
It would be nice if we could train Noah to get pop-corn on command. Like a monkey!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/19/17 Well... alright.
-plops down next to-
It's like I haven't already seen this series start to finish at least three times.
-paws-
Want some pop-corn?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/18/17
Are you...
Are you watching Desperate Housewives without me?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/16/17 -blanches-
We can't give up date night. It's the only fun I get to have! Corinne is my only motivation to keep living.
-clears throat-
Speaking of date night, how do pizza rolls sound for dinner tomorrow? I've got a bottle of red and about four backed up episodes of Grey's Anatomy we need to pretend to enjoy.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/16/17 Even if you don't mean it, I appreciate the sentiment. Not that I would ever make you give up oranges.
-nudges-
I'd give up Desperate Housewives for you.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/16/17 -skids in-
-leans over-

-lowers voice-
You're my favorite person in existence, goob.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/16/17 Reply to: The Wife
Re: Thursday

[VID]

Every day is special with you. But, yes, whatever you'd like. ...It's his birthday? I'll grab some balloons!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/16/17 Text to: Cait + Boys
Subject: Thursday
[VID]
Lloyd R Darrow 02/15/17 -scampers back-
Come on, beautiful. I've got The Bachelor DVR'd, and a bowl of orange gummie bears waiting just for you.
-drags-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/15/17 -swoops in all suave like-

... Happy Wednesday.
-trots off-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/14/17 Sir Mix A Lot? Are you saying I've got back?
-contemplates-
I acknowledge and accept this compliment.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/14/17 -small gasp-
You're so thoughtful.
Now. Dinner. There may or may not be a squeaky toy involved as well.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/14/17 I may have written it off as a business dinner...
-chastely kisses-
Heart brownies?
-perks up-
You're a fantastic wife. Happy Valentine's Day, Caitlyn.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/14/17 -knits brow-
Yes, of course. We're married. You're my partner. I'm going to shower you in stuffed bears and heart-shaped boxes of chocolate, approximately one hundred red roses, and a candlelit dinner consisting only of recipes that call for oranges.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/14/17 Jesus Christ. Try not to set anything else on fire. Now, come on. You're wasting a very expensive babysitter. We've got plans.
-coughs into fist-
Romantic, Hallmark-level plans.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/14/17 -scrutinizes tabloid-
I haven't the faintest clue. Are those photoshopped? I don't believe I've met either of those two women before in my life.
You're the only fanatical ginger for me, Cait.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/13/17 Yes, cookies. Obviously. What else is there?
I don't know if I'd phrase it as 'easier', per se, but she is uniquely qualified as the world's calmest child. And best looking. She's going to cure cancer, if you didn't already know.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/13/17 She's not high maintenance. She's an angel. I'm just terrified of three children together under one roof. But I suppose, if persuaded, I could allow it.
Elouise Orlav 02/11/17 Caitlyn
Lloyd R Darrow 02/11/17 ... But she's so high maintenance. Are you sure?
What's wrong with khaki?!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/09/17 -squints at-
No. We'll get the third dog. Because I wish to be known as the pragmatic, wonderful husband that I am. And I'll even let you name her. But if it's one of those tiny, yappy dogs, I'm taking it back.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/09/17 You're still not making sweetening this deal at all. At least pretend to offer you'll help take care of it.
-heavy laden sigh-
We can get another dog, if you really feel it is a necessary addition. What's one more dog?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/09/17 -blank stare-
We're not getting another dog. I'm the one that walks them in sub-zero temperature. And I clean up their sh*t. We'll just get Rigsby neutered, and you can pretend he's a female.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/09/17 Yes, right before I threw it out. Rigsby the puppy obliterated it. You probably shouldn't leave those toys laying around.
-holds up a cautionary hand-
Now, before you get hysterical, there's a new one in the kitchen.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/09/17 -narrows eyes-
I sincerely hope so.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/09/17
Camille Hammond 02/09/17
Camille Hammond 02/09/17
Lloyd R Darrow 02/09/17
Do you want to go eat a gallon of ice cream and watch reality television? Will that make you feel better?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/08/17 ...Perhaps. Who knows? They do send great gifts though. And, no I don't keep them in the basement. Relax.
-sets down box-
-grips shoulders-
Do you need a snickers? You turn into a jealous orange when you're hungry.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/08/17 Why would I send you a finger for myself when I could just go get several on my own, no distress necessary?
-knits brow-
Christ, Cait. It was a joke. And Ms. Roberts was only a prostitute in a movie. And I only eat the prostitutes without the heart of gold.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/08/17 It appears as though someone simply though to send me a snack with yours! We're already getting couple-presents. Isn't that sweet?
-scoffs-
Rigsby wouldn't have eaten it. He prefers prostitute toes, anyway.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/08/17 -stumbles in-
-frowns-
Someone sent you a finger, or I just didn't clean up after my dinner?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/08/17 -lady screams-
I'm behind! Don't ruin anything for me! I'm trying to work!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/07/17 -throws over shoulder-
-carries away-
Ice cream time!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/07/17 ... You're such a geek.
-groans-
Mackenzie 02/07/17
Lloyd R Darrow 02/07/17 -sees from down the hall-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/06/17 To: Cait
Re: Rain Check

I think I forgot to turn the oven off.
... in London.
Kidding. I'll be home soon, you massive nerd.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/06/17 To: Cait
Re: Duster

Perhaps. Why? Interested?
I might even get the apron too.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/06/17 To: Cait
Re: Sexy

Your dance moves are the only reason I married you.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/05/17 To: Cait
Re: No Subject


[VID]
Noura Orlav 02/05/17 -Stalks by-
KAAAAREN! HAS ANYONE SEEN KAREN!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/04/17 -bats lashes-
Wherever you get them from, Cait.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 Because he's smart enough to recognize handsome when he sees it. Obviously. And because we smoke cigars together.
-nudges-
Wait. So all I have to is mildly complain to get food and entertainment? Why didn't I realize this sooner?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 Dad? No. I want to be called 'His Imperial Majesty'. Because it sounds cool.
-flicks-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 Of course you are. You're the best. But that is unspoken.
-clears throat-
And one day, I'll be able to make toast without burning it. And then we'll be equals.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 No, I think you would definitely kill them.
-snickers-
On the bright side, the boys aren't dead yet, so you've got that on your record.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 No, Cait. That was a joke. You're fine.
-kisses cheek-
That, and I don't trust you won't accidentally kill them.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 Well. She does train sharks.
-rolls eyes-
No, I wouldn't leave you. Don't be absurd. Now, if she was a dolphin trainer...
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 Hm. I've never experienced this ploy before.
-huffs-
Still cannot. But I will, however, raise you burritos for dinner, and the newest episode of The Bachelor.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 Attorney-client privilege. Can't discuss it.
-definitely not grinning-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 ...
-scoops up-
Let's go get some orange juice. How about that?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 -blank stare-
-casually sticks a foot out-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 Yes, I'm fine.
-groans-
I think they grow them in California, as well. And India. I could stand a holiday in India. But we're bringing beef with us.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/03/17 -chokes on air-
That is an abrupt, specific conclusion. No, Cait, you're not. I don't think Florida is for the cultured, regardless...
-comforting pat-
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 -narrows eyes-
Of all the possible wedding presents, you want orange trees? I suppose we could acquire a few, but we'd have to keep them in the right climate. Maybe visit them for Christmas. That's what Americans do, right? They go to Florida in the winter?
Remi Rose 02/02/17 "The one down on Franklin Ave? New Orleans? They really are good.."

Eyes the woman over a moment. Orange slices on pizza? She had to be pregnant.

"That sounds pleasant.. Well, I like pineapple on my pizza! Oooo.. pineapple.."

Drooled a lil.

Remi Rose 02/02/17 "Hi! ..uh, would you happen to have the number to Domino's?"
Katarina Valentine 02/02/17 Congrats on your Union
Livia Vlcek 02/02/17 *nods* I'm down. As long as it's lemon ice and pulpy orange juice!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 -gags-
No, absolutely not. Pigs are disgusting.
Case in point, they will eat literally anything.
Livia Vlcek 02/02/17 *sheepish smile* Sankoes.
*notices ring* Congorats on your new union!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 But I won't, because I love you.
-squints-
I don't think there's much you don't know about me, either. But, who knows.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 ...it's probably better that I don't know. Right?
-pats-
And it's best you don't know all of my secrets either. Well. Some of them. Most of them. You can know whatever you want.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 -grabs wrists-
-glowers-
No, I don't own the pigs. And no, I'm not ticklish.
What about you? Secrets? Is red not your natural color?!
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 No.
That's amateur. The kids could find them. I feed them to pigs, obviously.

-swats hand away-
I'll tell you most things. But not how to make the best hot cocoa.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 I'm not concerned with why, I just want to be amused
-flicks-
I pay my taxes, you ass. But I will teach you some secrets. Like the best place to hide bodies.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/02/17 -lowers voice-
I don't think any of these people are smart enough to know whether or not something is legally binding. I'm just going to make things up and see how far along I get.
-leans over-
Of course you can watch me work. My wife is always welcome
-chastely kisses-
I don't believe so. She's a horrible influence, from what I've been told.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/01/17 Tomorrow?
-shrugs-
I'll have to move some things around. I'm sure Dr. Orlav won't mind. His sister might, though. I've agreed to sue Mrs. Orlav on the grounds she-
-can't actually believe he's saying this-
-smells like a wet diaper.
Lloyd R Darrow 02/01/17 -pouts-
Marriage is compromise, Cait. And also indentured servitude.
-grins-
When would you like to go to Bora Bora?
Lloyd R Darrow 02/01/17 You are now contractually obligated to bring me coffee in the morning.
Congratulations
.
-soft applause-
Dita Morgenstern 02/01/17 [leaves a gallon of orange juice WITH pulp as new friendship offering.]
[slips away quietly.]
Lloyd R Darrow 01/31/17 Mm. Well...
-stern stare-
Alright. Fine. I give it an eight out of ten. You flirt, you
Lloyd R Darrow 01/31/17 -knits brow-
Fanboy? No. General fan, yes.
-squints-
Are you... attempting to be suggestive? Oh, that's adorable, Cait. Good for you for trying.
-pats head again-
Camille Hammond 01/31/17 -lip wobbles-
Where... Are... The puppies????
Camille Hammond 01/31/17 -whispers-
This place needs a puppy.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/31/17 -heavy laden sigh-
I give up. I wasn't meant to be a funny person.
But, to reiterate, no, I do not sleep with the fangirls
.
-pats head-
Unless you count yourself as one, and then I recant my previous statement.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/31/17 -starts laughing-
-made his first joke ever-
No, Cait. Never. Was that not proper humor?
Lloyd R Darrow 01/30/17 -prods side-
I'm afraid that's not really up to me. The fangirls are rabid. Totally beyond reason. At least they like you!
-kisses cheek-
At least you don't have to have sex with them. It's horrible.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/30/17 Yes? And? They touch my butt too. And I touch your butt. The only person whose but doesn't touched is theirs.
-flicks nose-
At least you've got a nice butt. It could be worse, they could be gossiping about your flab.
-pauses-
That was a hypothetical scenario. You do not have flab.
Jace Remington 01/30/17
Lloyd R Darrow 01/29/17 -throws over shoulder-
-leads away-
Dinner started fifteen minutes ago.
-shifty eyes-
I'm not sure if we'll still have a table. But on the bright side, my hair definitely looks great!
Solomon King 01/28/17 Solomon was minding his own, heading down a fairly busy street to this hot dog shop that apparently had some legendary 'dogs when he heard someone calling his name. He turned, zoning in on the red hair rapidly bobbing into view.

He offered a heavily bearded smile when he recognized Emma St-, no wait. Caitlyn! Yeah, that's right. She always smelled nice, like fresh oranges. "Hey! How're you doing?"

As soon as she reached him, she blurted out her question. Her very strange question. He couldn't help it, he had to laugh; a hearty, contagious sound. "Man, sounds like that question's just been burning you up. Sorry to disappoint, but my parents just weren't that cool." He bowed his head slightly, looking at the stroller. "Who've you got there?"
Lloyd R Darrow 01/28/17 To: Cait
Subject: Date Night

You, me, dinner. We'll leave the boys with some bread and water. They'll probably survive.
[VID]
Camille Hammond 01/26/17 -is apparently super fat omg-
Camille Hammond 01/25/17 -rolls up on a camel-
-princess waves-
Lloyd R Darrow 01/25/17 Mm. Yes. And I do believe it's a fair exchange. Don't you?
-shoves all of the cookies in his mouth at once-
-takes an incredibly long time to chew and swallow-
And I would be lost without you. Now! We need to catch up on The Bachelor. Come on. -pats sofa cushion-
Lloyd R Darrow 01/24/17 -grins-
You're the best.
-narrows eyes-
Excuse? Bill? No. He's a grown man, he knows how to wash puke out. Noah and Rigsby didn't do anything wrong. I don't make anyone pay for them puking in my stuff.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/24/17 -starts to object-
-practices deep breathing-
Fine. As long as he's not puking in them.
-bats lashes-
Want to go get me some cookies?
Lloyd R Darrow 01/24/17 -clears throat-
-furrows brow-
-prods-
Have you seen my fuzzy slippers?
Camille Hammond 01/23/17 -widens and re-narrows so many times-
Camille Hammond 01/23/17 -narrows eyes-
Lloyd R Darrow 01/23/17 To: Cait
Re: New York

Orange juice dispensers? You lucky girl. And that would be a yes to shoe shopping. Potentially just loads of shopping in general. I want one of those little drones you can fly with a remote control.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/23/17 To: Cait
Re: New York

They seem to save their puking for my shoes. We really need to work on that. Your shoes need some love too. I will see you at 12 sharp. I'll be in the red dress.

Did you see that? I was trying to make a joke. I think I just ruined it. I love you, too. See you soon.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/22/17 To: Cait
Subject: New York

I finally found my way home. In the meantime, I was doing this:
[IMG]
Lucius Dalca 01/22/17 Text: Stranger >_> Maybe?
Lucius Dalca 01/22/17 Stranger,

Im not a common *****! Im an escort!

JK! Well maybe for money like that but... Anyways thanks for the dough Ill be sure to make great use of it ;)
vamp_goku 01/22/17
Lloyd R Darrow 01/20/17 Cait. Relax. The dogs will survive.
And I have no idea what Jameson feeds his dogs.

-grins-
I'm sure Rigsby is flattered you care so much, but he's a dog.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/19/17 New York? Yes. Always yes.
Anything that's warmer than Moscow.

-pats head-
We're leaving the dogs. I hear the thing to do around here is lock them in Doctor Orlav's office, anyway. We'll just do that.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/18/17 -grabs the ball-
-great reflexes-
I don't think it's bad, per se.
Why? What did you do?
Khloe 01/17/17 Um... No. I don't think so. Is it supposed to?
Khloe 01/17/17 Caaaiiiit! I FOUND A HUGE DUCKY FLOAT!

Lloyd R Darrow 01/16/17 -flings rubber band at-
Lloyd R Darrow 01/15/17 -blinks-
That sounds absolutely repulsive. Chocolate and orange? Together?
-pauses-
... Whatever makes you happy, Cait.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/15/17 Ice cream?
Hot cocoa, perhaps
.
-wraps arm around-
Or, both. How does that sound?
Lloyd R Darrow 01/15/17 -narrows eyes-
What? I don't express feelings. You know this.
-exaggerated sigh-
You're adorable. Okay?
Lloyd R Darrow 01/15/17
Oh? Really? Well, thank you. You're...
-swats nose-
You're you.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/14/17 I'm what? - Oh, Jesus, Cait. That looked like it hurt.
Khloe 01/14/17 "I think you have a nice butt. Why are people touching it? Do I need to poke them in the chest? Like the cheesy taco guy?"
Lloyd R Darrow 01/12/17 -is tackled-
-groans-
Jesus. No. Too much love.
-crawls out from under, tucks one child under each arm-
Clark will get over it. I missed you all too. Come on, I tried to make my room as comfortable as possible. I think you'll like the house I'm looking at. Lots of space to hide dead bodies.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/12/17 To: Cait
Re: -Unhinged-

Teleconferencing. Clark is going to hate Moscow. Come with the boys at your own convenience, and I'm sure I'll have everything sorted by then. I'll even look into the daycare, just for you. If not, we can always just lock the boys in a closet with some marmite and crackers. They'll live.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/11/17 To: Cait
Re: The Mentally Unhinged

Jesus H. Why wasn't I informed of this sooner? This woman isn't allowed to watch the children. Or touch your butt. That's my job. We're filing for a restraining order. The Orlavs cannot be within 1000 feet of our asses.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/11/17 To: Cait
Re: Handsy Doctor

Hold on. Back up. Dr. Orlav played grab-ass with you? Isn't he married? Jesus. What am I getting myself into?
Lloyd R Darrow 01/11/17 To: Cait
Re: Moscow

Your message left me with more questions than answers. If you want to move to Moscow, we can certainly look for property. I think Doctor Orlav is more than capable of feeding himself. Send loads of pictures.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/11/17 To: Cait
Subject: Moscow

I've taken a position with Doctor Orlav. Apparently, you two know each other. Also, I went dog-sledding.
[IMG]
Lloyd R Darrow 01/10/17 To: Cait

Like tomorrow, yes. Of course Clark isn't any good. You're comparing him against me. Love you too. I'll see you and the boys before you know it.
Lloyd R Darrow 01/10/17 To: Cait
Re: Gray Taylor

I'll be home soon. Give him a washcloth, or something.
And I've missed you, and all that rubbish.
Autumn Dalca 01/09/17 A delivery arrives, addressed to Caitlyn Noire. Obviously... Who else would it be for?


Attached is a note:
With Regards,
G. Taylor
Mackenzie 01/08/17 Dear Caitlyn,

Even though we didn't exactly get off on the best foot at the beginning of my stay, I just want you to know - I believe you are more than orange juice.

-Mackenzie
Jameson Orlav 01/07/17 Le Cait
Well we are building a kids quarter in our wing. Noah and Rigsby could always test it for us. AND we happen to have the best tacos in the northern hemisphere.

Le Cait
*is bribing*
*please amuse my wife she's making me crazy*
Elouise Orlav 01/07/17 Cait
Don't panic, it's going to be okay.
Use alcohol swabs, that should get it off, and won't be too rough on Rigsby's face.
...oh my god. I'm turning into a mom.
Elouise Orlav 01/06/17 Caitlyn
There is no proof I taught your kids how to do anything bad.
Unless you have a nanny cam, in which case... you might.
Jameson Orlav 01/06/17 Cait + ..8??
Uh oh, Elouise babysitting is starting to take hold. May the lord bless you, you're doomed! .. Need a taco?
Elouise Orlav 12/29/16 -sneaks up behind-
-touches booty-
Lloyd R Darrow 12/29/16 -bum-rushes-
-kisses forehead-
Hi. I love you.
-evidently very hyper-
-runs off-
Lloyd R Darrow 12/22/16 Stalking quietly into the room, Lloyd leans against the door-frame, arms folding across his chest. He directs a pointed gaze a her, verdant eyes rolling at the question. "Men's Wearhouse is an abomination. Wearhouse isn't even a damn word."

Socks keep his footsteps quiet as he strolls over, snatching the tabloid from her hands to give it a once-over. "His face isn't that weird. You're just comparing it to Rigsby's. And he's rather handsome. He gets it from me. Delusional, party of one.
Lloyd R Darrow 12/18/16 Lloyd starts to type his response, before he realizes Caitlyn is just in the other room. Shutting his laptop, he ambles down the hall from his office, trots down the stairs, and falls down on the couch beside her.

With pitiful eyes, he shakes his head. "Sorry, Cait, no animals on these excursions. But, we could probably rent a puppy, or something...or dress the boys up?"
Lloyd R Darrow 12/18/16 To: Caitlyn
Re: Christmas

London. I was thinking Bora Bora in the spring?
Don't worry, beaches and khakis are still in your future.
Lloyd R Darrow 12/18/16 To Caitlyn
Subject: Christmas

I bought the plane tickets to London. Hope you're ready.
But you can also back out. Rigsby said he hates fog.
Lloyd R Darrow 12/14/16 -stops, drops-
-covers mouth, frantic eyes-
Shh! I've got cookies, and I'm not sharing with Noah.
Are you in, or what?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/14/16 -jumps out-
-scoops up, runs away-
Lloyd R Darrow 12/13/16 I need tea too. And some crisps. And Desperate Housewives.
-looks up at-
Can we do all of that?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/13/16 -finds, collapses on-
-heavy sigh-
I need a nap.
Jackson McCarthy 12/13/16 To: Cait
From: Jack
Hold up. Who the fvck is Llyod?! Have I been living under a rock or something? Lord. I'm sorry. Rigsby is a...wonderful name.
Jackson McCarthy 12/13/16 *blinks at phone*
Nephew???
To: Cait
From: Jack
Rigsby?? When the hell....Please tell me this is a joke. Or it's a dog. That doesn't sound like a baby name. That sounds like a dog name. You worry me, Cait.
Athena Maximus 12/13/16 She smiled as she had ran up to her in a hurry. Holding an IV bag full of OJ. "I had a friend call and said you needed a house call. Only the best for her kitkat she told me." She looked at the woman confused before shrugging. "Whatever that means." She smiled brightly at the woman in front of her. "You must have more OJ. Doctors orders!"
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16 Ugh. I know.
It's because he's so handsome. If he were ugly, we'd be having an entirely different discussion.
...and something about love and dedication. You're right.
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16 Or, like, permanently.
If I run away, then I can completely avoid the subject of babies.
...and I can babysit Noah again!
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16 Sort of. But she's drunk all of the time!
-hangs on-
Don't leave me here. Take me back to Bloemfontein!
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16 Jameson!
-deep breathes-
-eye twitch-
This is going to be a disaster.
What if I kill it?
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16 -gasps-
No! I can't handle his problems and the baby's!
Play dates?!
This is too much stress.
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16 -whines-
It was just some cranberry juice! I was mixing a drink!
-blank stare-
I'm going to be a horrible mother. I can't have children! They'll die!
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16 -tugs on sleeve-
-wide, innocent eyes-
I gave Rigsby some juice.
...I didn't know babies couldn't have it.
Jameson Orlav 12/12/16 *screeches*
WHATAREYOU-
Oh my god. I'm going to kill her.
Elouise Orlav 12/12/16
Lloyd R Darrow 12/12/16
Stuck? … Like forever?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/11/16
You’re such a strange woman.
Lloyd R Darrow 12/11/16
Lloyd R Darrow 12/09/16 Mashed potatoes are entirely necessary.
Should I go and scout a proper dessert?
Noah and I need cupcakes.
Lloyd R Darrow 12/09/16 Carrots. Spinach is foul.
-furrows brow-
Last question. White roses or red?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/09/16 You asked, I answered honestly. Red meat was meant to be enjoyed, not chewed for hours like old leather.
-takes hand, squints-
... What size is your ring finger?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/09/16 So rare it might as well still be screaming.

-smirks-
Gold, silver, or platinum?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/08/16 Mm. We'll take it into consideration.
-prods-
What cut of a diamond do you prefer?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/07/16 -blank stare-
No. Think a little harder.
...we can name the dog Rigsby too.
Jameson Orlav 12/07/16 *screams*
Oh.. Its like a taco Popsicle!
Lloyd R Darrow 12/07/16 -pats head-
Don't worry. The only thing we'll have to discuss is the name of the puppy I adopted today.
Elouise Orlav 12/07/16 -gasps-
-covered in flour, definitely flour-
Ohemgee! Yes! Cookies!
Stay forever.
Elouise Orlav 12/07/16 [text reply]:
Blame Jameson!
And get your butt over here.
...I'm baking cookies.
Lloyd R Darrow 12/07/16 -prods-
But if we get married? Shouldn't I get to know first?
...I'm not sure I want to know anymore.
Lloyd R Darrow 12/06/16 -squints-
But we weren't married. Or involved. Whatsoever.
You're not really selling me with the reasoning here.

-snickers under breath-
Lloyd R Darrow 12/06/16 ...who the hell marries the same person more than once?
Lloyd R Darrow 12/06/16 -folds arms-
For the moment. So, nine marriages was it?
And if Casey is yours, you've got a lot more explaining to do.
... Just promise the part about more babies isn't true. Everything else I can live with
.
-snorts, strolls over-
For the record, it isn't an autobiography. Tossers.
Elouise Orlav 12/03/16 To: bff
From: bored
Message:
I have no one to watch Sunday morning cartoons with!
Send Noah ASAP.
Jackson McCarthy 12/02/16 *lets her stew for awhile*
*Only slightly annoyed*
*but it's cool. He's cool. Defo not mad*
To: Cait
From: Jack
Gee. What a weird question, Cait. Every last drop of alcohol in my place was replaced with club soda. Don't worry! But, I will have to get you back some day :D
Elouise Orlav 12/01/16 -clears throat-
...as soon as we're done watching Telly Tubbies.
Elouise Orlav 12/01/16 -steals infant-
-shifty eyes-
I'm gonna put him in a monkey costume.
Livia Vlcek 11/29/16 *hands her a photo of a puppy*
*smiles* Hai Cait!
*trots off with a piece of toilet paper stuck to her boot*
Livia Vlcek 11/29/16 *jumps out of Caitlyn's bathroom* CONGRATULATIONS!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/29/16 He rolls his eyes, shaking his head. "You don't have a problem. You've just had way to must exposure to Clark." Lloyd sinks back into the couch, a thoughtful expression on his face as he swirls the contents of his flute.

"Celebrating? Oh. Clark finally used the yard today!" He reaches over, flicking her nose. "That, and I baked cinnamon buns for dessert, and they're not at all burned."
Lloyd R Darrow 11/29/16 "Mm. Nope. No meltdowns tonight. Stay put." Lloyd shuffles off into the kitchen. He emerges with two champagne flutes, pausing in the doorway. "Just sparking cider." He states for the sake of clarity.

Sitting back on the couch, he offers one of the flutes over. "We're celebrating tonight, and not just because you found the toy I threw out. ...wait, you dug that orange squeaky out of the trash?"
Lloyd R Darrow 11/29/16 -blank stare, tugs on toy-
I had a question, but I've changed my mind.
God, you're so strange.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/29/16 -pokes-
Pst.
Camille Hammond 11/29/16 "Imma gonna get you ALL the squeaky toys!!!"
Lloyd R Darrow 11/28/16 So long as it didn't have a cent left, I'm not worried.
Of course I'll go shopping. But I'm only buying mac n' cheese. That stuff is great!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/28/16 -smiles-
No, nothing new to report. ...yet.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/28/16 Assault? Huh. They're not usually so physically demonstrative of anyone other than me.
-blank stare-
What did you tell them? Any sordid details?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/28/16 Nine?! Sweet Jesus.
-kisses cheek-
It's okay. In the words of the great Donna Meagle, 'treat yo self'.
Camille Hammond 11/28/16 -gasps-
Yes of course! But what happened to the last one?!
Dessa Chambers 11/28/16 Thanks!
*takes offered tictac* The orange wealth is being shared! I'm so honored!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/28/16 -feigns offense-
Then I suppose you being Caitlyn Darrow on the other credit cards is also enough!
...how many fake credit cards do we have?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/28/16 I don't believe you!
-lowers voice-
Do I have to be a Noire too?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/28/16 There are more of you?!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -pats Noah's head-
Just remember, Lloyd will always help you hide the bodies. Because I'm fantastic.
-clears throat-
But your mother is right. Violence is only used when necessary. Like if you prefer someone's lunchtime snack to yours.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 To quote a true American film, Talladega Nights, if you're not first, you're last.
-pats Noah's head-
If at first you don't succeed...kill you adversaries, and then success is guaranteed.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -grimaces-
Noah sticks his tongue out.
... And one time, he stepped on my toes
!
-huffs with indignation-
Mackenzie 11/27/16 Mackenzie the jerk. She doesn't try to be. It just happens. She's been a bit out of her element, and frustrated. That comes across as mean, rude, and/or evil.



Honestly, she's just cranky. Very, very cranky. And moody. And, well. It's not been a good couple of weeks for the Irish femme.

But, with Caitlyn walking away, the best she can do at this point is catch the woman's eye and give her a knowing nod when the look is cast back in her direction. She gets it, all too well. And, just like Caitlyn, she too would protect what is hers. Kenz may be moody, but she is also loyal to a fault. "Ditto."

Not another word. Just walk away.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -glances over at-
He's definitely a tough one to beat.
-flicks Noah's ear-
But at least he doesn't cheat like some people.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -sly grin-
Not so much, no.
-steals baby-
Plus, Rigsby and I have a staring contest to get back to.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -dramatic gasp-
Me? A jerk?
-stumbles over, grapples both woman and baby-
If you leave, I'll have no one to share these oranges with.
-hopes bribery still works-
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -snorts-
I just wanted to see how fast you'd come running back.
...watch reruns of this singing show with me and I'll consider a very nice ring for you.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -reclines, turns on TV-
-calls after-
Okay! I'll just stay here with Clark and this engagement ring.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -blinks-
No. You smell.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/27/16 -wide eyes-
-stuffs waffles into mouth-
Mah'weh me.
Mackenzie 11/26/16 She must be insane. That's it. Cait absolutely has to have lost her goddamn mind.

Mackenzie stares at the woman, head tilting as icy blue eyes casually flicker up and down the woman's form, and back again. Yes. Lost her mind. But she has to play nice. That was part of the deal, right?

Ugh. No. Cannot. Can't.

"If by orange juice and hugs, you mean blood and-" bad Mackenzie!

Slowly, she leans in, giving the woman one of those awkward, uncomfortable, one armed hugs. "Thanks..."
Lloyd R Darrow 11/26/16 -hugs, kisses cheek-
I got you some orange creamsicles, because I was feeling nice.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/25/16 Rigsby rolled under the bed and I can't get him out.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/24/16 Smashing?
-snickers-
Sure. Of course. Whatever you say.
Elouise Orlav 11/24/16 [text reply]:
Yes, I cooked! It might even turn out well.
Jameson and I dressed the kittens up in little outfits.
Family is great!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/24/16 I don't understand how any of this works.
Is this supposed to make sense?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/24/16 No! American Football! Come on, Cait, I'm acclimating!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/24/16 Shh. I don't know. I'm watching football.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/23/16 Now, now. That's only a half-truth.
-sighs, offers handkerchief-
Calm down, it's the earliest the family could get away. I invited everyone.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/23/16 I haven't decided yet. Maybe Christmastime.
How does that sound
?
-ruffles hair-
I have to give the fan girls ample notice.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/23/16 How have I been mean?
-prods-
Hmm? I was joking about Noah, and the leggy blondes.
... Please don't call my mother.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/23/16 -squints-
You're so terribly difficult.
-swats at-
Can you leave after I've been indoctrinated into the American festivities surrounding Thanksgiving? I want stuffing.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/23/16 You can't move out with my dog!
-folds arms-
I'll trade you, Clark for Rigsby.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/22/16 -beams with pride-
No, I didn't sleep on the couch. I made Noah sleep on the couch, I took his bed. Because I'm the adult.
Elouise Orlav 11/22/16 [text reply]:
Drugs not hugs.
Elouise Orlav 11/22/16 [text reply]:
Only if she brings the kool-aid and special brownies.
Elouise Orlav 11/22/16 [text reply]:
Who is Lloyd? Gross, no. Stay forever!
The vodka is REALLY cheap here.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/22/16 -guides into dining room-
-clears throat, points-
Two slices of toast, and one egg. And nothing is charred!
Elouise Orlav 11/22/16 To: gingerbread hoe
From: miserable in moscow
Message:
I miss Noah. Bring him. And you can come too. Maybe even Jameson Jr. can come!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/22/16 -creeps up behind-
-pokes-
I made breakfast! Come look.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/21/16 No, no. They got the memo.
All of the fangirls are leggy blondes anyway, so they're not exactly threatened by you
.
-snickers-
...that was a joke, by the way. Don't get emotional.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/21/16 There are children about! I can't just leave skeletons where they can find them.
...they're all in the basement now.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/21/16 Only one...and a half.
-wry grin-
I'll be okay, I swear.
Maybe.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/21/16 Maybe tomorrow.
-kisses brow-
I'm too dizzy to focus on a screen.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/21/16 -hands glass of orange juice-
-grumpy-br> -clearly still hungover-
Was there something I had to do today? I can't remember.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/21/16 Maybe.
I still have to ask again tomorrow
!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/21/16 -scoops up-
If we're inviting my mother, then we're also inviting your psycho sister. Or... we don't have to invite anyone.
Elopement is so painless.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 -furrows brow-
I'm not asking for taxes!
-huffs-
I thought you Americans loved weddings. It's a billion dollar industry here.
-frowns-
Would you marry me even if it wasn't for tax purposes?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 Rigsby will behave, we have an understanding.
-reaches for hands-
Because he's not going to ruin his mother's wedding, he's very well-behaved. Can we get married? Should I ask again tomorrow?
-nods, determined-
I'm going to ask again tomorrow. Don't answer now.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 I can walk. I just don't want to.
-groans, gets up-
How long until Bora Bora?
Can we go tomorrow?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 -sets bottle down-
-snuggles up beside-
It still works. I can hear it.
-big yawn-
We're gonna sleep on the couch tonight. I'm too tired to go upstairs.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 Shh.
-swigs beer-
-wide eyes-
Tic tacs aren't that big!
-completely aghast-
You don't love me!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 -stumbles out of kitchen-
-hands beer-
Can you even drink?
-drunken smile-
I love you. Just a bit. A tad. Only a hair, really.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 If you don't hit the gas pedal I'm going to shoot myself.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 -wide eyes-
I don't want crazy. You're enough, I promise!
-plops on bed-
-wounded stare-
I'm not...grumpy.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 A minor detail.
-snickers-
I'm joking, Miss Sensitive.
You're irreplaceable. Probably.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 -scoffs-
Don't get ahead of yourself. IHOP is also fine.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 -picks back up, groans-
You're so dramatic. I'm leaving you at the firehouse with Clark.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/20/16 -scoffs-
-sets down on steps-
Carry yourself to bed then. I'll just go get all of the good pillows before you.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/19/16 -rolls eyes-
Shut up.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/19/16 -stumbles over-
-scoops up-
Come on, crazy. You need sleep.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/19/16 -sleepy smile-
You're delirious. But I love you too.
-grabs empty beer and box of cheerios-
-stumbles into kitchen-
Where is the baby?
Camille Hammond 11/19/16
Lloyd R Darrow 11/19/16 -half-asleep on couch with Rigsby-
-watching Narcos-
-mumbles-
And that, my boy, is why you don't f*ck with Pablo Escobar.
Elouise Orlav 11/19/16 -clears throat-
-gets notebook and pen-
Okay. I'm ready. Hit me!
Elouise Orlav 11/18/16 -squints-
...maybe.
Elouise Orlav 11/18/16 -saucer eyes-
Tell me. I demand to know.
Elouise Orlav 11/18/16 ...do I?
-wide eyes-
Elouise Orlav 11/18/16 -tugs on sleeve-
Where do babies come from?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/17/16 -gasps-
...but he looks just like me!
-furrows brow-
No, no. You go to bed, I'll take care of everything.
-flexes-
Just remember how great I am when my mother reigns terror down upon us all.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/17/16 -heavy sigh-
I'll write her tomorrow, then. Now, stop trying to charm my baby. He's mine.
-winks, nudges-
Bed time for both of you. We've got a long day of moody baby ahead of us.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/17/16 -grins, kisses brow-
You know you don't actually have to win me over. I'm going to do it regardless, but I have to keep a tough exterior.
-wide eyes-
Asking my mother for baby khakis might alert her to the fact that there is a baby. Which may or may not have been mentioned in my latest email.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/17/16 Don't worry, I'll take care of the dog.
You need to rest. And eat snacks and watch movies
.
-quietly rocks Rigsby-
And if you really win me over, I might consider getting you a McMuffin in the morning. But don't bet on it.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/17/16 No, I don't believe so. Second verse, same as the first. That's literally a lyric from the song.
-shuffles over, kisses cheek-
I enjoy you in general... Don't get a big head over that.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/17/16 -slides by-
-singing to Rigsby-
I'm Henry the eighth I am, Henry the eight I am I am...
I got married to the widow next door, she's been married seven times before
!
-back tracks-
I can't tell if he's laughing because he likes it or because I'm bad.
Jameson Orlav 11/15/16 *scratches head*
Are.. Are you her mom?
Elouise Orlav 11/15/16 -stops, runs back-
-sniffles-
...candy?
-nods-
Okay, fine.
Elouise Orlav 11/15/16 -freezes-
-triggered-
-ugly cries-
-runs away-
Jameson Orlav 11/15/16 *sage nod*
*dramatic echo*
Prudence. PRUDENCE. pRuDeNcE.
Elouise Orlav 11/15/16 I want both!
Satiate my need for validation!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/15/16 Fine. Fine.
-groans-
-lifts up into arms-
This is a one time thing. Because I'm nice.
Jameson Orlav 11/15/16 WHO told you-
*mumbles*
Elouise...
*coughs*
I mean.. Elouise Prudence.
*wonders if, like Rumpelstiltskin, knowing her whole name can stifle her evil*
Jameson Orlav 11/15/16 *girly screams*
Lloyd R Darrow 11/15/16 Yes. He's cute. Of course he's cute!
...until you live him with the babysitter and her meth lab explodes
!
-very imposing-
-relenting sigh-
We're getting a nanny-cam if she's going to stay around.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/15/16 -laughs-
Yes, I'll still love you. But I don't believe it will come to that, ever.
...Wait.
-blinks-
Jesus Christ. The babysitter is a pill pusher?!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/15/16 -pats hand-
I'm not horribly offended, Cait.
You were a bit busy, and rather drugged up.
Elouise Orlav 11/15/16 Don't worry! No drugs until he's 16.
-scowls-
I'll kick her lily white ass to be the God Mother.
I earned a promotion! Camille doesn't hang out with Noah and feed him!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/15/16 -grins-
Darling, you kept referring to me as the Pizza Man.
While I do agree it is an admirable superhero name, I've always considered myself as more of a Batman type of fellow.
Elouise Orlav 11/15/16 -blinks at-
Rigsby? ...fine.
I accept this name. I'm the God Mother, right?
I want to introduce this child to fun things. Like drugs.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/15/16 I'm taking Noah and Clark to the nearest fire station.
I hear they take great care of abandoned dogs and children
.
-pats-
Elouise Orlav 11/14/16 ...oops.
You didn't hear it from me!
-makes gimme hands-
Do I at least get to hold Jameson Jr.?
Elouise Orlav 11/14/16 -pft's-
Right. Not "my" baby.
-uses air quotes-
I'd give it a great name. Like Jameson Kingston Orlav Junior!
Elouise Orlav 11/14/16 First, I'll kick his ass. Easy.
-huffs-
Second, you can't name my baby Rigsby!
Elouise Orlav 11/14/16 Yes, pictures!
-scuffs floor-
Or if I could just borrow it for a few weeks...
Elouise Orlav 11/14/16 To: baby mama
From: cabbage patch kid
Message:
I haven't gotten baby pictures yet and I am
OFFENDED. I'm very maternal now, thank you.
Jameson Orlav 11/14/16 *flounces in shades of gold*
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 Don't be dramatic!
-being very dramatic-
We'll just name it Noah, and then either way we're right!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 -whines-
Why did I agree to this?!
...what are we going to name a girl?
We should have planned harder!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 -slams on the break-
A girl?! I'm really not prepared for this!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 If I break to hard, is he going to fall out?
...would that be a good thing?!
-panics-
What if Rigsby isn't a good name?! We don't have any time to pick a new one!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 -puts the pedal to the metal-
Are you sure you can't just hold him in?!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 -throws Noah and dog in the back seat-
If you give birth in this car, you get to keep it.
And the cleaning bill.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 You don't need the dog!
-screeches-
What?! I'm not equipped for this!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 -screams-
-tucks Noah under arm-
Let's go, go, go!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 -tackles keys out of hands-
You can't drive! You're a balloon!
...a lovely, beautiful balloon?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/11/16 -runs around screaming-
Where the hell is the baby bag?!
Jameson Orlav 11/10/16 *hands cloaked in oven mitts*
*claps together, then waves at*
*bends at the knees a little, like a catcher*
OKAY. I'm ready!
Elouise Orlav 11/10/16 Elouise looks down at her phone, reading it over a few times to make sure she'd gotten it right.

Baby?! Gross. Children are awful.

[text reply]:
new phone, who dis?
Elouise Orlav 11/10/16 To: Kay Toe Lane
Message:
I thought I said stay AWAY from the brownies and kool-aid!
Jameson Orlav 11/10/16 *wide eyes*
WHAT?!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/10/16 -throws head back, groans-
Whaaat?!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/10/16 Hold on, Noah is invited?
-whines-
Jameson Orlav 11/10/16 Whens this kid coming anyway? I need someone to watch cartoons with.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 -freezes-
Stop moving so fast! You're going to shake him out!
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 -rolls eyes-
It was a joke. You can pick whatever name you want.
So long as it isn't something stupid. Like Foxxy Cleopatra.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 -shifty eyes-
We don't need names where we're going.
-pats-
Camille Hammond 11/09/16 -ears perk-
-gasps, grins, palms patting against the tops of her thighs-
What's that? Who's a good girl? That's right, you are!
-coughs, shifty eyes-
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 -groans-
We're going off the grid.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 -taps chin-
I don't see why they wouldn't. He might get held to see if he has any diseases, but that won't be for long.
-shivers-
We won't give her the forwarding address. How about that?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 -blinks-
Canada, then Australia.
-walks over, kisses brow-
...we'll come back in however many years it takes for this cheeto puff to go away.
-sighs-
We just can't live in England, because then it would be very easy for my mother to find us and make us wear khakis.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 Anywhere but America, my dear.
How does Australia sound?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/09/16 -looks up from zipping up suitcases-
There isn't any time to eat waffles.
We're fleeing.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/07/16 -blank stare-
You're a twin? There's a twin?
...you don't switch each other out, do you?!
-pokes-
Which one are you?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/07/16 -tilts head-
Which Lindsay? The one from Napa Valley or the one from London?
You don't sound like the latter. But who knows, they both faked accents for that movie.
-wide eyes-
She's not really a twin, is she?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/07/16 -smirks, kisses cheek-
Nothing to be done about that, I'm afraid.
I just have the more appealing accent.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/07/16 -pats stomach-
Me too Rigsby, me too.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/07/16 McDreamy is a terrible surgeon.
Obviously Meredith is the only sensible one here.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/06/16 -wrapped in blanket burrito-
-marathoning Grey's Anatomy-
-mouth full of popcorn-
Thif is na' rea'wis'tic.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/05/16 You're impervious to illness with all the orange juice you drink.
-sighs, glowers at stomach-
Rigsby, stop being a sh!t.
-looks back up at-
Satisfactory?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/04/16 What? It's not like he's going to listen to me.
Jameson Orlav 11/04/16 [text reply]
You silly nugget. When you
go into labor you won't be
going anywhere.
...Are you sure there's just
one?
Jameson Orlav 11/04/16 To: squeakytoy
From: le doc
[message]
Well.. Depends on your definition of
licensed. Technically, no. But that
doesn't mean that I don't have the
experience!
Lisbeth Salander 11/04/16 [cants head] The lip ring? No. I found it quite pleasurable. [gives a crooked smile]
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 Treat?
-begrudgingly gets up-
-disappears, reappears with Halloween bucket-
You can have whatever candy you want.
-plops back down-
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 -wide eyes-
No, absolutely not. I will not be a proponent to such a culinary catastrophe.
-yawns-
Just do it after I fall asleep. Then I'll never have to know it happened.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 You would not have said yes, because you would prefer to marry me.
-nudges-
Pizza, grumpy?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 -girly scream-
-clears throat-
I didn't tell Emerson to do anything. She said she'd prefer to marry you, so I suggested she go and make it a surety, then.
-pats cushion next to him-
Now come here and relax.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 [message reply]:
I already packed a bag, I have a car, and we can just sell Noah to the gypsies.
Don't worry, it was only cranberry juice.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 To: Cait
That sounds ominous.
Am I in trouble?
Noah spilled the juice, I SWEAR.
Ashton _ Wendell 11/03/16 Gives YOu a basket full of your favorite orange juice" *Congrat on your new rank to black beat you deserve it!!*
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 [message reply]:
Let her down gently.
And then we can eat the pizza I ordered.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 -derisive snort-
And let Emerson use it?!
There's cash in my wallet.
Also.

-kisses cheek-
I've been informed affection is important.
...so there you go.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 Sleep is wonderful.
They're just gummies, I'll buy you more.
You do it.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/03/16 Ask Emerson to get it.
She never does anything important.
Like sleep.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/02/16 To: Cait
Re: [multimedia message sent]
I got fudge too. And a mustache.
Tooth cavities are a guarantee. So is stargazing.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/02/16 To: Cait
Re: [multimedia message sent]
I’m too busy looking at you.
I’m assuming that was a yes to ice cream. Ben and Jerry are creative fellows.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/02/16 To: Cait
Re: [multimedia message sent]
I prefer this picture of you imitating Clark.
Can we have ice cream for dinner?
Lloyd R Darrow 11/02/16 To: Cait
I like you, just a bit.
[multimedia message sent]
Lisbeth Salander 11/02/16 Congratulations on achieving the elusive 20! And the first werewolf no less.. [toys with lip ring] I think ..maybe.. I can spare you the taser just this once.
Lloyd R Darrow 11/01/16 A nap? Only for a few minutes.
-yawns-
-closes eyes-
-snores-
Lloyd R Darrow 11/01/16 -wraps self around-
-heavy sigh-
Life is rough.
I want to sleep forever.
Briahne 10/31/16  photo Happy2016_zpspewdlkpg.jpg

"Congratulations on RANKING to BLACK BEAST!!!!"

Lloyd R Darrow 10/31/16 The babysitter's husband's credit card? I don't have to pay him back, right?
-big sigh-
We can go camping, so long as you promise not to eat anything that was not originally intended to be food in the first place.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/31/16 I was informed recently you never tell a pregnant woman 'no'. So yes, Clark can have a new friend. Until he inevitably eats the puppy to prove his dominance.
-pats head-
But no more puppies... or milkbones. We're training for a marathon here!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/31/16 -blank stare-
Puppy?! Milkbones?!
-sighs heavily-
So long as the hammock and crib are practical.
-ruffles hair-
Happy Halloween, you absolute goober.
Sofia Johanneson 10/31/16 Much congratulations and applause for your hard work and ranking. You are an inspiration to all beasts and a credit to the Crew and Realm!
Dr Van Helsing 10/31/16 Rank 20! Very well deserved.
Livia Vlcek 10/31/16 Congorats on Black Beast! *hive fives*
Andrei Codin 10/31/16 * I snicker as I hide behind a parked car, and let my voice carry thru the night * You're quite welcome
Lloyd R Darrow 10/30/16 -blank stare-
With my credit card?!
-shuffles over, alleviates the armload of gifts-
...you didn't drink any of it, right?
Andrei Codin 10/30/16 * I slink thru the bushes as I sneak up to the front door, making sure no one sees me. In front of the front door, I leave a big box of Milk Bones, with a note attached. " Congratulations on your great accomplishment. * I ring the doorbell,then I run like hell *
Marah Boru 10/30/16 "Congrats here have a drink."
+ hands her a bottle of Captain Morgan.+
W_Kat 10/30/16 WTG!! Congrats Cait! *hands you an Orange*
Jameson Orlav 10/30/16 *sighs and laughs*
Yeah, alright, you're welcome. Enjoy, and consider it my congrats for your hard work.
*grabs candy, stuffs into his pocket*
*plots wifes doom*
Jameson Orlav 10/30/16 *glances over his shoulder*
*looks back to cait*
Let me guess.. Plastic?
Of the MasterCard sort?
Jameson Orlav 10/30/16 *narrows eyes*
*perpetually suspicious of shenanigans*
Thanks for..?
*eyes cart of orange merch*
Ronan Boru 10/30/16 Congrats on the rank 20.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/30/16 -strolls away to kitchen-
-shouts from the other room-
Obviously! You can't vacation before a marathon!
...
Should the popcorn be turning black?
Lloyd R Darrow 10/30/16 -pats head-
I'll make the popcorn too. You just sit there and work on your calves. We're going to train for a marathon, and you can just push Rigsby in a stroller in front of you.
-pats stomach-
-whispers-
He's going to be the fittest baby ever.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/30/16 Yes. You look very intimidating.
I wouldn't challenge you to a kick boxing match.

-pats-
I'll go pick out all of the orange flavored Starbursts from their packages for you.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/30/16 Waffle tacos?!
-big eyes-
-squints-
...have you been working out?
-pokes muscles-
King Of Nazareth 10/30/16 *Congrats Caitlyn on ranking to 20...
Elouise Orlav 10/30/16 ...I vote yes to the power suit and to the swimming pool! It's okay, Camille will love it!
Elouise Orlav 10/30/16 No, no. I can get it later. Right now we've gotta buy you the most expensive everything ever!
Elouise Orlav 10/30/16 And we'll get clothes and shoes and whatever else you want!
...some oregano.
-coughs-
I mean, no oregano. Today is about y-o-u!
Elouise Orlav 10/30/16 -loves, smothers and worships-
You're getting a lifetime supply of orange juice courtesy of Jameson's credit card!!
Elouise Orlav 10/30/16 -heavily pets-
My precious...
Jameson Orlav 10/29/16 *eyes wide*
Waffle.. Tacos..
*chases after*
Lloyd R Darrow 10/28/16 Lloyd reaches over, taking her hand in his. He lets out a soft laugh, watching as his thumb traces over the back of her hand. "Just don't touch anything in the fridge, ever. I'll label all the safe things from now on. That Kool-Aid is a serious trip."

"You don't need to be anything like anyone from Desperate Housewives. They're dysfunctional in a very different way. You're an least enjoyable."
Lloyd R Darrow 10/28/16 Oregano looking flakes in the orange juice…? Caitlyn, you know that’s --.” He cuts off, letting out a scoff and a sigh as he shakes his head in disapproval. He knew despite anything he said, no warnings over her favorite babysitter would be heard.

Lloyd swats her hand away, rolling his eyes. “You don’t need to mother me, I survived. Barely. At any rate, I rather enjoyed my walk about. Besides the whole drugged, wilderness bit of it. And naturally, I missed your pancakes.” He lets out a sigh, leaning his head on her arm. “And you, maybe, just a bit. But that’s why I got you juice.”
Lloyd R Darrow 10/28/16 Lloyd stumbles into the living room, disheveled, exhausted, but bearing two bottles of orange juice. He plops down beside Caitlyn, handing off one of the juices before he scratches his head -- coming up with a few leaves, which he promptly discards on the floor.

"I got up in the middle of the night for a drink, and could only find that weird purple Kool-Aid. I had some, and I woke up hours later on a park bench four miles from home." He clears his throat, unsealing the cap of his own drink and chugging some with obvious thirst.

"I would have gotten an Uber, but I didn't have my phone. So I bought some juice and walked back. There is something seriously wrong with the babysitter for leaving that were Noah can get it."
Livia Vlcek 10/28/16 *picks up a tic tac and pops it in her mouth*
*blinks a few times*
*cants head and ponders* Maybe yes? Except without the hippos, the marbles or the fun.
*offers her a chair to sit in* I will choose the Batman with the horns and pink unicorn, please.
*squints* Why is he riding a unicorn...through the house.
Livia Vlcek 10/28/16 *eyes widen at the word 'Batman'*
*grabs a cone to 'help' Caitlyn*
*noms the frozen dessert* Are they the plasters with his face or just the bat signal?
*looks around at the quite humble apartment she's residing in* Um, see, funny story...my house was lit on fire and I had to move here.
*shifty eyes* After the Hunger Games in Slovakia...
Livia Vlcek 10/28/16 *lifts her head from the book she's reading*
*wonders how Caitlyn got into her home*
*ears perk at 'Italian Ice'* Is is for my broken nose or my blackened eye?
Elouise Orlav 10/28/16 You can have all of the special brownies you want after baby!
Elouise Orlav 10/28/16 -swats-
Say no to drugs, Cait!
Elouise Orlav 10/28/16 If it's on the fridge and has my name on it, assume the worst!
...and if Camille makes Kool-Aid or brownies, also expect the worst.
Camille Hammond 10/28/16 ALLOFIT! Don't trust any one but me. I've always got your back.
-little crazy blinks-
Camille Hammond 10/28/16 -slaps away orange juice from Caits hand-
Don't drink that, its poison! Or, well, its never oregano around here.. Bunch of druggies.
-frowns-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 No, no. I can make it. I'm just going to need some Advil. And the heating pad.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 -rolls eyes-
I'm not going to throw out my back.
-lifts-
-heaves-
-turns blue-
-drops back down-
I guess we can just sleep on the couch tonight.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 -shrugs-
Good. So long as it's consensual pocket rooting.
-big sigh-
Just this once, I'll carry you up the stairs. But if you hit your head, I'm not taking responsibility for it.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16
You’re adorable and I forgive you for being so demanding.
-furrows brow-
Why is Emerson fondling you? I thought that was my job.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 We're not going to Bora Bora anymore.
...because it's not a vacation if I have to work.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 Only a few.
...no pregnancy jokes. You're not a whale!
Of course I'll carry you. But only if you deserve it.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 -groans-
I did not say that!
-scoops up into hug-
You also just happen to be pregnant, you dunce. If I dropped you, I'd fling myself off of a bridge.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 -wide eyes-
-sits down beside-
I mean this in the most practical, kindest way possible.
-pauses-
-kisses-
ThereisabsolutelynowayIcancarryyou.
-deep breath-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 I'm going to have this babysitter killed in a heinous manner.
-huffs-
Jameson Orlav 10/27/16 *bursts through door*
WHERESMYCAKEPREGGERS.
*narrows eyes and crouches*
I will attack a pregnant lady for cake!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 -nods in agreement-
So lucky. I also put hand soap in the dishwasher...
Lloyd R Darrow 10/27/16 -shifty eyes-
I only spilled a little bit.
Elouise Orlav 10/27/16 -gasps-
Careful with my funfetti!
-keeps chasing, gets winded-
... I'm gonna go take a nap! Don't drop that!
Elouise Orlav 10/27/16 ... did you just steal my monthiversary cake?!
-chases after-
I'm gonna bust your gingerbread ass!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 Yes, you're catching on!
-yawns-
Don't worry, you and Clark were there as well.
Not even in my dreams can I avoid your insistence for a khaki family picture.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 Alice died in the first episode, Cait.
-pauses, offers hand-
I was dreaming about the beaches of Bermuda...pink sand, no Legos to step on. It was wonderful.
-squeezes hand-
I also bought Noah a giant, stuffed giraffe. I saw it in a catalogue... I need an intervention.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -sigh-
No, you silly woman.
Come to bed, Alice will still be dead in the next episode.
...and every episode
.
-stumbles for stairs-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -shrieks-
-rolls off couch-
-hits head on coffee table-
...You're bad luck.
-grumbles-
I'm going to bed, so this brewing concussion becomes a full blown coma.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -asleep on couch-
-snores-
-drools on-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -knocks phone away-
-hugs-
Shh. Focus on Desperate Housewives. Gabrielle just got caught having an affair!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -slams laptop shot-
Excuse me?!
-eye twitch-
You weren't also shirtless, were you?! Who do I have to kill?!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -gags-
If you want to eat char, we can definitely take turns.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 --rolls eyes-
Well isn't he a regular Julia Child.
-taps chin-
No. Only for the next week or two, and then I'll expect waffles.
-flicks nose-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -peeks over at-
You're too kind to me.
-kisses brow-
I swear I'll learn how to cook.
... or I'll make Clark do it.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -sulks-
-hands McMuffin-
I can't fry an egg after all.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/26/16 -flicks nose-
Fine. I was going to stay up and watch Desperate Housewives, but I'll just make sure you freeze to death ahead of schedule.
-loops arm around-
-heavy yawn-
Just wait until I let myself go.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -scowls-
I can fry an egg, you ass.
-folds arms over chest-
...just because you're beautiful and talented doesn't mean I can't be as well!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -groans-
Yes, you are. Yes, I will.
No groping, or I'll put on several layers of sweaters
.
-furrows brow-
And I might even make you breakfast in bed tomorrow.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -girly squeal-
-pulls off glasses-
Don't objectify me! I'm not a slab of meat!
...
-kisses brow-
Come on, preggo. Bed time.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 To: Khaki Queen
[multimedia message sent]

Fan girls are great for photography! … Clark threw up on my shirt. That's the only reason I'm not wearing one, I swear.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -dragging trash bags behind him-
-grumbles under breath-
Maybe I should leave you out with the cans.
-grins-
-glances back at-
I'm not going to throw Noah out, I just bought him a new Lego set. I've invested!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -groans-
I suppose.
-stomps off-
-yells behind him-
But I'm leaving him in the can with the bag!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -eyes over-
I'll take out the trash if you make them right now.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -narrows eyes-
...no. I get pancakes and she doesn't. I'll consider that a win in my book.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -grumps-
Yes, I'm clean and lovable again.
-accepts hug-
...I'm a better babysitter, to be clear.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -gasps-
-sputters-
I thought I was your favorite!
-wounded gaze-
I'm going to go change my shirt.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -tilts head back-
-glares-
Who teaches a child to play with fire?! Just let her down gently. It'll be fine.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -wonderment cut short by bloody nose-
I'm fine!
-holds sleeve to nose-
No matches, I swear!
Fire your babysitter, woman. I'm not going to raise a vagrant!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -skids into room-
-slams into wall-
... Baby movement? I want to feel!
-huffs-
I left the boy with a bucket of chocolate covered pretzels and Nightmare on Elm Street.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 To: Sleep Talker
[text]:
Noah skipped school and we're going to eat lots of Halloween candy and watch Horror movies. You can hang out with Clark.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/25/16 -eye twitch-
-groan-
Now I am.
-yawn-
The Dragon's name was Snark. And he burned anyone who dare wake him from his slumber.
...same for the Prince. He would even go so far as to hang a princess if she dared to keep him up.

-nudges-
-sleepy mumble-
No more questions. Just sleep.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/24/16 -smug grin-
-snuggles-
Thank God. I was worried I'd have to turn you out onto the streets.
-kisses brow-
Now hush up, Orange Princess. Prince Floyd needs his beauty sleep.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/24/16

Fine. But only one.
-leads to bed-
Once upon a time, there was an English Prince. We’ll call him… Floyd.
-tucks in-
Floyd was incredibly handsome, and dashing, and intelligent, and…
-clears throat-
One day, he encountered a Princess, with beautiful red hair, and an eccentricity for a certain citrus fruit. Prince Floyd inevitably won the Princess over with his many attributes, grand castle, valiant companion, and… no. That’s about it. Now, go to bed.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/24/16 Because I know all.
-intimidating stare-
...
Sod it. Do what you'd like. You're too adorable to punish.
-grumbles under breath-
Elouise Orlav 10/24/16 ... I was thinking it would make for a great surprise!
Right after I tell him we're handing out toothbrushes instead of candy.
Elouise Orlav 10/24/16 -shifty eyes-
Yeah... right... Jameson will totally get some.
Elouise Orlav 10/24/16 ...can I also get a taco?
Lloyd R Darrow 10/24/16
Feet on my back? No, absolutely not. I’ll know.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/24/16 My Xanax knocked me right out. And even if I wasn't drugged, you couldn't possibly snore louder than Clark.
Elouise Orlav 10/24/16 I'm dressing Noah up as a little Jameson. It'll be great!
We're just going to run around with knives and fire!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/24/16 -nonchalant shrug-
That definitely seems like a problem you'll have to solve on your own.
You're American! Where's your creed of individualism?
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 -groans-
He can be a dragon. Alright? Problem solved. Now.
-tugs on sleeve-
I'm exhausted. Bed time.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 -blank stare-
He's a dog. He doesn't get a costume.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 Tinkerbell is the ripped off version of me. There will be so much glitter we'll be sneezing for weeks!
-triumphant nod-
-leans over-
-chaste kiss-
That's for being so pragmatic. And for the pancakes.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 -furrows brow-
Why don't you wear the ball gown. It would make more sense for you to play the part of the princess.
-taps chin-
We'll make Noah be the prince. Do I get wings?
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 -big sigh-
Whatever makes you happy. As long as I get glitter.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 -frowns-
No, I want to be a dog. Or a fairy princess.
Noah has to be something spectacular and creative.
...like a cowboy. I hear that's well received.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 -squints-
Paint my face?
... I suppose.

But I deserve a medal for saying yes.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/23/16 -arms full of arts and crafts supplies-
I was told the best way to learn about Halloween was through this application called Pinterest.
... We're going to paint your stomach like a jack-o-lantern now.

-big smile-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -rolls eyes-
We're just going to watch Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Relax.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -big smile-
You're the best!
-pats head-
Noah and I are going to go watch cartoons.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -big eyes-
I'll eat whatever you don't eat... but I want the dinosaur.
... Noah doesn't need it.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -runs into kitchen-
-wide eyes-
I'm not qualified enough to handle this!
-starts to back out-
Your diary is under your pillow!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -blinks-
-kisses cheek-
Pancakes. Stacks on stacks.
-looks around-
I just gotta go... put your diary back in a conspicuous place.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 I want pancakes. Lots of pancakes.
-shifty eyes-
Diary? ... I have no idea what you're talking about.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -heavy sigh-
Whatever you would like. Dog, no dog.
But no khakis.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -scoops up into hug-
I won't be going on any tropical vacation with you.
... or Clark. He'll never let me live it down.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -rolls eyes-
Come on.
I'm not that negligible. I threw them all in the sink. Totally useless now!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -beams-
I knew I kept you around for a reason.
Oh...
-scratches head-
Noah looked so sweet, so I thought a few wouldn't hurt...
Lloyd R Darrow 10/22/16 -mumbles-
-grumbles-
-sighs-
...good. I need someone to do my grocery shopping.
And switch the light bulbs.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 Seven.
-squints-
...Eight. It's an eight.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -huffs-
...I'm not jealous of a dog!
-shifty eyes-
So what if I am?
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -glares-
Fiji worked its way into the plans when you chose to marry Clark.
... I'll bring you back a t-shirt.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -grumbles-
Fine. I hope Clark is good at changing diapers.
I'll be in Fiji with all the hot mamas.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -scoffs-
Because I called dibs.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -frowns-
You can't marry Clark! I own him, and I say no.
-mumbles under breath-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -scoffs-
One would be expensive enough, thank you.
I'll stick with monogamy at present. But, who knows...

-shrugs-
Maybe I'll marry Clark.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -contemplates-
No, I think they have a few years before they're no longer hot.

-pats-
...you're certain you want me to bring back a bunch of good looking women for you?
Jameson Orlav 10/21/16 Of course. Do I look like some kind of monster?
*snatches, starts to gnaw on churro*
Say, is there anything about me in there?!
Jameson Orlav 10/21/16 *eyes churro like a puppy dog*
Diary? What do I care about your diary?
*tries to snatch the treat*
Lloyd R Darrow 10/21/16 -tilts head-
-fights back laughter-
Yes, my dear. I'll bring you back plenty of hot mamas for your amusement.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/20/16 -stops-
-sighs-
-kisses cheek-
I won't go to Bora Bora without you.
... maybe just Hawaii.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/20/16 -mumbles under breath-
-kicks dog toy out of the way-
I need a vacation!
... but I guess I'll wait for Rigsby to be born.
Maybe.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/20/16 -stumbles around house-
-steps on ninja lego-
-yelps-
That's it! You all need to move out!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/19/16 I said almost anything. Don’t get too adventurous.” He snorts derisively. “Clark is not family, Clark is a dog. He doesn’t get to eat at the dinner table, and he doesn’t get to be in the Christmas photos.” He reminds, before meeting Clark’s gaze, and he lets out a sigh. “… okay, so he’s family. But he’s still not getting in the damn picture.”

We’ll find a good name. I promise.” He pats her hand, giving her a small smile. “… I’ll make sure you don’t read anything terrible… we can’t have you naming the baby Brad Pitt because you read a tabloid.”

Lloyd leans over, pressing his lips to her brow. “Time for bed for you, I think. Noah doesn’t need a zombie mother. And pregnant or not, I expect a full continental breakfast when I wake up. Four rations of bacon and all.” A quiet laugh escapes his lips, the smirk plastered to his features revealing his sarcasm. “Clark and I are going to get into some online gambling charges with your credit cards.”
Lloyd R Darrow 10/18/16 He’s still rolling his eyes and shaking his head, a clear subscriber to propriety. “That is why I’m constantly relieved Clark is such a responsible chaperone.” He lets out a little sigh. “You can call me whatever you like. Like Clark, if you use the right intonation, I’ll answer to almost anything.”

…but you can’t name the child after the dog. I’ll never let you live it down.”
Lloyd R Darrow 10/18/16 Isabelle? No, no. That simply won’t do.” He shakes his head for emphasis. “Rigsby is a great name!” Lloyd’s chest seems to puff back out in pride until he’s sucked into the confines of the blanket, he relents, a sigh escaping him as he leans into her.

A groan escapes his lips as she shakes his head. “Hunky Lloyd?! Not… ‘Intelligent’ or ‘Witty’? Am I just a piece of meat to you?!” His indignation appears to only be a front, as his grin stays plastered. “Isabelle is starting to seem more and more appealing…”
Lloyd R Darrow 10/18/16 He deflates, letting out a disgruntled sigh. "No nicknames. Give it my middle name. I wouldn't mess with a chap named Rigsby. Right?" He gauges her reaction with clear defensiveness. "Or you can just preface Lloyd with 'Baby' for... the baby. And 'Handsome' for me. Unless we're both handsome, then we'll have to think a little harder..."
Lloyd R Darrow 10/18/16 He scoffs. “Clark doesn’t need a pie. Ineed a pie. Many pies. Of all sorts of flavors. But we’ll start with cherry.” A challenging glare is shot to Clark, who responds with a low growl. Not a stupid dog, this one.

Bernerd? Like… Bernie? Cait, that sounds like the kid who gets his lunch spit on. You’ve gotta pick a strong name.” He puffs his chest out. “Like Lloyd.” Lloyd nods with increasing eagerness and approval. “I’d be terrified of a kid named Lloyd.”
Elouise Orlav 10/18/16
Lloyd R Darrow 10/17/16 He perks up at bit, leaning in to press his nose to hers. "Yes, special dinner. Yes, pie. Is that even a question?" He cracks a smile, pecking the tip of her nose before he pulls back.

"All babies start out looking like prunes. We'll give it at least two weeks to shape up, or we'll just pass it off to someone else." Lloyd grins, shaking his head. "Madness is relative, you know. I may be mad, but I'm perfectly sane compared to most."
Lloyd R Darrow 10/17/16 Consider this a pre-intervention, intervention.” He quips amiably, before freezing, his smile dissipating some. “Shopping? Well, someone has to carry your bags. I’ll consider it.” He relents, another sigh escaping.

His gaze focuses ahead, mind wandering for a moment before orange juice is mentioned. He blinks, blue eyes focusing back to her with a jadedness. “I’m not quite apt enough to enjoy this heavenly nectar, presently. It might be a day or two before I have a taste for more than water and saltines.” He relents as she leans against him, readjusting so his arm would wrap around her shoulders.

Moody dog, I can handle. Fanatic red-head, I can deal with. Charming yet devilish little boy, … probably manageable. Baby, pushing it, but if it’s cute I’ll get over it. Second dog? Good God, woman. I’ll go mad!”
Elouise Orlav 10/17/16
Elouise Orlav 10/17/16 -big sigh-
Okay, you can have the squeaky toy back.
Elouise Orlav 10/17/16 -wide eyes-
... it wasn't me!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/17/16 The man emits a heavy sigh of defeat. "Shop wherever you like... just don't bring home any sympathy khakis. For me, or you." He stares down at her with an intimidating brow, but the smile he still wore certainly contradicts it. "And no artistically obtrusive frames. Just basic, plastic, and black. And we'll pop the glass out to prevent any further incidents."

"... I don't believe we get to choose what they run us out with, but I can certainly try and make a few requests. No promises. Angry mobs aren't really my forte." Lloyd takes a sip of his OJ, finding his tastebuds hadn't totally restored after the hunt. Instead he simply offers the glass over to the crazies red-head beside him. For once, totally happy to share.

His expression shifts, mockingly offended by the question. "Return policy? I'm a top of the line product, no defections. If anyone requires a return policy, it's me. I would have traded Clark in for a Labrador any day."
Lloyd R Darrow 10/16/16 Her words register with him, and he tilts his head, looking at her questioningly. “…Do people like Ikea?” He shakes his head. “I’ll just shop online… or give you my card. You may shop anywhere you’d like for the furniture, but if you try to bring home outfits for Clark, we’ll be having a serious intervention.”

Cute frame? Well if you liked it -- ” He’s cut off by her tirade of a confession, a smirk growing as she went. He shakes his head, scoffing in amusement. “Caitlyn, we really must work on your sidewalk skills. My neighbors already think I’m strange enough, without your stalking habits adding to it. We’re going to get run out of here with fire and pitchforks!”

Lloyd slithers out of the living room for a few moments, returning only once his hands were filled with two glasses of orange juice, a bag of chips dangling between his teeth. He passes off her glass, releasing the chips so they fall onto the couch, before he sits down after them – narrowly avoiding crushing them in the process. “And if you buy this furniture, you’ll be passing the point of no return. There will be absolutely no getting rid of Clark.” He clears his throat. “… or me. But that’s tertiary.”
Lloyd R Darrow 10/16/16 Nail polish…? Of course. You know… for Clark.” He looked about with shifty eyes before returning his sight to her, and then over to the dog for affirmation.

Clark, for all his interest, simply billowed out a sigh, an admission of defeat. “Ah, see? If he can deal with you and I, he can certainly handle Noah. So long as he doesn’t try to steal his oranges, which won’t be a problem, will it? The dog has more to fear with you.” He grins, reaching over to tousle the hair on Clark’s head, earning a whine of disapproval, but no action.

You’ve spoiled this dog, you know. Now I can’t use him to fend off burglars, and we’ll never know if Jimmy’s stuck in the well… not that we have any wells around here, but it would be good to know!” Lloyd relinquished the fight, gaze lifting towards the ceiling momentarily. “… I’m afraid I don’t have an extra bed. All of those rooms are rather under-furnished. I suppose I could just go to… Ikea.” He let out an involuntary shiver at the name.

And I’ll pick up a few extra picture frames while I’m there.” At the final comment he shot her a meaningful look. “Try not to bust anymore, yeah? We can’t have broken glass laying around all the time. People might begin to think this is actually a murder house.”
Lloyd R Darrow 10/15/16 Legos are dangerous, got it.” He nods, still unclear as to why they would then be allowable child’s play. He nods as she rambles on, noting every way in which he could entertain the boy. “Coloring? He’s not going to paint the walls with crayons, is he?” He looked around, feeling a pang of fear that the freshly painted wall would soon be destroyed with handprints and markers.

Did he really care? No, he supposed not. Walls could always be refinished. He looked to her then with a vague smile. “Holiday? You’re catching on. But, if that little girl gets on a flight, Jane will never take her back.”

Or we could just give him Clark and let him run rampant. Every boy deserves a dog! There are a hundred and one books written about just that. I don’t believe Clark has ever actually dealt with a child… but I’m sure he’ll be fine.”
Lloyd R Darrow 10/15/16 Hide the matches? His eyes go wide, unsure now of what to expect with this child. Eagerness faded into terror. Would he be swinging from chandeliers next? ... It was a good thing there weren't any installed.

"I've never actually entertained a child... I suppose he doesn't have any knowledge of wine, then? We can't chat about foreign affairs..." He lets out a big sigh. This boy would hate him.

"No, not from Desperate Housewives, you ass. I have a niece, remember?" He flicks her nose, finally cracking a smile once more.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/14/16 He rolls his eyes, a feigned glare projected her way. "You wound me, you know. I value my khakis far too much to stow bodies in there additionally." A quiet laugh follows, before he looks to her with noted surprise.

"Noah? I finally get to meet this chap?" Eagerness was not an emotion he expressed well, but it seemed as if he was. And then, a much deeper laugh follows at her next comment. "Good Lord. I think my mother would be on the next plane." He neatly tucked the idea of baby khakis away, saving it for later plotting. "I proclaim with great confidence I am the swiftest, most efficient diaper changer you shall ever meet. You're lucky to have me, really. It's not often I offer my services so freely."

Lloyd was teasing, naturally. There was a part of him that craved the busyness and comfort of family life, even if he would never admit it.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/14/16 "We'll figure something out. We have to, don't we?" He lets out a quiet sigh, somber faced as he reached out a hand to rest at her midsection, though the blanket stood between them. "If I can protect an innocent life, I will." A smile grows as his gaze lifts up to meet hers.

"I suppose this will keep you from London or Bora Bora for a while, mm? All in good time. It's best to endure any Darrow in small doses."
Elouise Orlav 10/14/16 He's... he's super busy right now, with like... puppy...stuff.
-scrambles off-
Lloyd R Darrow 10/14/16 He kept a smile as she spoke, far from one to judge, but it truth, it bothered him little. Until she expressed her pain, which he could understand just as well. Lycanthropy was often the destroyer of humanity, and hope was too weak an option and never a cure. The sway it held over him was profound, destructive, devastating. Lloyd allowed the threat of his affliction running rampant keep him from so much, that he felt a bit of anger swell within him at her anguish.

The man didn't know if he could help, if he could prevent in any way what happened. The call of the wolf levied strength over any human part of him every day, the thirst to run wild, to hunt, to kill. To know she struggled was a frustration he could not overcome. He himself had given a few years of his life to opiates, the drugs suppressing much of his will, but at the sacrifice of his human form as well. And that, of course, was no option for her.

"We can find a solution. There must be one, somewhere. I refuse to believe that... that you should have to sacrifice anything."
Elouise Orlav 10/14/16 ...Princess Buttercup does!
Lloyd R Darrow 10/14/16 Lloyd returned the kiss without trepidation, but with noted surprise. After a short moment, he would draw back, tracing a stray hair from her face and tucking it neatly behind an ear. "I won't be going anywhere, Caitlyn. I promise." He takes a moment to readjust her blanket, folding her neatly into her former burrito'd state, the semblance of a smile on his lips.

"I believe you have something to tell me." His tone was matter-of-fact, but his expression read coaxing, understanding, even accepting. "And before you go blaming Clark, he did not give you up. It's just a bit... easy to tell." Was he calling her fat? He certainly hoped not.
Lloyd R Darrow 10/13/16 Brains? He lets out a soft chuckle. “No, not hungry for brains. Maybe some potato crisps and a glass of orange juice.”

A terrible thing? His mind reeled, wondering what piteous activity she had gotten into in his absence. At her admission, he mocked brief horror, before giving her a gentle pat, his arm wrapping around her in comfort. “Don’t worry, I’ve plenty more where that came from. It was a beautifully kind gesture, though. And now there is a very fashion forward zombie thankful for it as well… if he knows any better.”

As she began to unfurl from the blanket, he released her, looking on in absolute horror. Crying, khakis, it was too much of an auditory and visual assault. “Caitlyn. Caitlyn.” He tugs on the blanket, helping her escape the mass of comforter. “Relax.” He places his hands on either side of her, meeting her gaze evenly.

I’m not going anywhere. You missed me, didn’t you?” In truth, he appeared rather touched. Letting out a little sigh, he leaned over and pressed a kiss to her brow. “Deep, calming breaths. You’re making the dog nervous.”
Camille Hammond 10/13/16 I'd give Mrs. Orlav a pat down. Rumor has it she's funding a puppy orphanage. Or maybe Jameson is funding it unknowingly. Either way, she's probably hoarding alla the squeakies!
Jameson Orlav 10/13/16
Lloyd R Darrow 10/13/16 "Perfectly alive, Caitlyn." He lowers himself into the chair beside the two, accepting that Clarke look too comfortable, and more than that, too betrayed to be greeted. His eyes switched to the red-head, swallowing harshly. He was parched, hungry, but all of that seemed to fade with current company.

A laugh rumbled in his throat as he glanced towards the movie choice, and the broken frame. It was cut short, of course, as he recognized it was not wholly appropriate. "I should have left a note, or said something. I didn't mean to make you think I'd left."

The entire display left him with a pang of regret. This woman, his dog, all things he deemed important. And yet, the beast had taken control of him at his weakest point, and would now have to suffer the consequences. "You've certainly made yourself quite comfortable in my absence."
Lloyd R Darrow 10/12/16 This was not the first time Lloyd had heeded the call of the wild. The beast, kept dormant since the full moon, ached for action, and the bloodlust curled like a vicious whip deep in his core. The safest thing to do was to escape New York City, keep his animosity reined in all much as he could.

Neither wolf or man was very certain of what he had done, or what had transpired in that nearly two-week gap. But sane again, he ventured back home from where he found himself, to a person he hoped had not given up on him just yet.

I believe you have my dog.” A hallow voice, but the accent remained. He recalled a time when that had been a joke. When the two both seemed happier. Lloyd read from her demeanor that something was amiss, but he knew not what. “…and my khakis.”

He clears his throat, arms folding across his chest as he watched her with skeptical eyes. “Not moping on my account, I hope? We never set a date for our tax-reduction wedding, so I know I haven’t jilted you – yet.
Jameson Orlav 10/12/16 To: Cait
From: Jim-Jam
[message]
Heard through the grapevine that you're feeling blue. I've got a pill for that. I am a doctor you know. Come see me when you're ready.
Elouise Orlav 10/11/16 -feels forehead-
Are you feeling alright?!
Elouise Orlav 10/11/16 Don't cry!
...want an orange popsicle?
Elouise Orlav 10/11/16 *launches water balloon at*
Elouise Orlav 10/10/16 Really? Then I guess the other four puppies I have hiding in my room won't be a problem either. You're so good at giving advice!
Elouise Orlav 10/10/16 No. But that's only because I don't spend time with them. Puppies... probably a different story. It's okay, I'll just make him think it was his idea.
Elouise Orlav 10/10/16 -shifty eyes-
But what if he gets jealous? This puppy is obviously more lovable. And I'll cuddle with it more... and give it more treats.
Elouise Orlav 10/10/16 ...I got a puppy. I need help convincing Jameson to keep it.
Elouise Orlav 10/07/16 -...sh!t-
I'll... I'll be right back.
-scampers off-
Jameson Orlav 10/07/16 *stares*
*looks around suspiciously*
When did we get a dog??? *pets*
Elouise Orlav 10/07/16 There is no feeling better!
-shifty eyes-
Not for at least nine months.
-whispers-
I'm having a little Jamie!
-definitely isn't-
-but who's going to call her bluff?-
Elouise Orlav 10/07/16 -drops the tool-
Who am I kidding?! I can't hurt you!
-jumps on-
-smothers-
Elouise Orlav 10/07/16 -toys with said screwdriver-
Sooooooo sorry about this, Cait, but I'm going to have to cut your eyes out. It's nothing personal, I promise.
Elouise Orlav 10/07/16 -innocent whistle-
-also has a screwdriver-
Caitlyn, have you seen my shiirtless husband anywhere?
Jameson Orlav 10/07/16 *has PTSD flashbacks*
Jameson Orlav 10/07/16 *hops up onto the counter next to her*
Cait. This woman tried to beat me to death with a slice of pizza. HIDE ME.
Elouise Orlav 10/05/16 Not poison, no. We can smoke it, and then go watch Mary Jane dance, if you want. Just don't tell Jameson.
He'd be jealous either way.
Elouise Orlav 10/05/16 You're not going to need ice cream.
...
Yet.
-gentle pat-
Are you familiar with our good friend Mary Jane? It's why Jameson is acting so weird today.
Elouise Orlav 10/05/16 -snickers-
Okay. Come on, Caitlyn. I'm gonna make you the cool mom.
-drags-
Elouise Orlav 10/05/16 -stops-
-reconsiders-
You don't have to get drug tested anytime soon, do you?
Jameson Orlav 10/05/16 *glances around suspiciously*
Of course I'm a doctor!
*cough*
... Can I get some vodka with that orange juice?
Jameson Orlav 10/05/16 *wobbles in*
*stares, narrows eyes and furrows brow*
Caitlyn Hasselhoff!
*whispers*
I think my wife poisoned me.
Elouise Orlav 10/05/16 It's the special ingredient to Camille's brownies. I think I'll just...
...
Give it back.
-backs away slooooowly-
Elouise Orlav 10/05/16 I didn't see any spaghetti...yet.
-opens bag-
...
-sniffs-
This...isn't oregano. Abort! Abort!
Elouise Orlav 10/01/16 Of course I want him to have the best! That's why he has me!
Elouise Orlav 10/01/16 ... I'm supposed to say yes, right?
Elouise Orlav 10/01/16 I'm sure, but mine are obviously softer and better and match my room!
Elouise Orlav 10/01/16 Is it stealing if they were mine to begin with?
Elouise Orlav 10/01/16 ...I just thought it was a contract promising we'd be kind of nice to each other. Jameson steals all of pillows!
Elouise Orlav 10/01/16 If I had known marriage involved sharing blankets tacos I would have never gotten married!
-huffs-
Jameson Orlav 09/30/16 Oh my god. Ohmygod.
Jameson Orlav 09/30/16 Fishy Friday? No.. FIESTA Friday!
.. Or something?
Jameson Orlav 09/28/16 *stomps up to*
*may or may not have Elouise slung over his shoulder*
*wags his finger at*
Caitlyn Hasselhoff Noire!
Do you know how expensive paper children are? Toner? Ink? MACHINE MAINTENANCE?
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 I'll tell Jameson it was all your idea!!
-scampers off-
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 -gasp-
What?! Those are horrible names!
-pouts-
If I have fifteen more children, their names are gonna be Grenade, and Bullet, and Cannon, and Missile...
-taps chin-
Great names. I should definitely be a mom.
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 -big eyes-
I don't want babies! Don't make me have babies!
-lip quivers-
Tell Jameson I don't want any real babies! Fake ones only!
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 -shakes head-
No, he's Mr. Warrock!
-gags-
I changed his shampoo, hopefully he stops smelling like cheese feet soon!
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 -gasp-
Jameson is your ex-husband?!
-knits brow-
Now I'm gonna have to kick his a-s!
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 If I tell you who it is you have to promise to love me anyway!
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 Him... him no one.
-swallows-
I didn't marry anyone. This ring is fake.
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 ...I told you nothing.
-flashes ring-
-looks around-
Don't worry, it won't last for long. I have to kill him now.
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 He steals my shoe all of the time! I mean...
-coughs-
-shifty eyes-
Never mind.
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 -shifty eyes-
No reason in particular. Death, you say?
-nodnodnods-
That seems a lot cheaper. Thanks for the tip, Caitlyn!
Elouise Orlav 09/28/16 Do you know any good divorce attorneys?
Jameson Orlav 09/28/16 *lady screams and drops is bowl of Mac n' cheese*
Jameson Orlav 09/27/16
Camille Hammond 09/26/16 That's the best idea I've heard all day!
Elouise Orlav 09/26/16 -scribbles this down in a notebook-
You should totally write a parenting book!
Elouise Orlav 09/26/16 I have a question referring to the ethics of motherhood...
-shifty eyes-
-lowers voice-
Is it bad to steal money from your kids? Even if they're zombies?
Jameson Orlav 09/24/16 Jameson hears a thump against the door to his office, but through the clear frosted window, he doesn't notice the silhouette of any person or.. Thing.

"What the.."

He removes the glasses from his face and downs the last bit of bourbon in his glass before he pushes from the desk and answers the door.

But he's greeted by a whole lot of nothing, besides a squished taco at the base of his door and the shrill sound of vacating child laughter.

"When did we start recruiting children..?" Jameson speaks into the air, and with a shrug closes the door and heads back to his paperwork.
Elouise Orlav 09/24/16 -hears something slam against her door-
-crawls under bed-
itisnotspaghettiitisnotspaghetti...
-whispers to herself-
-forms fetal position-
Jason Reindhart 09/24/16 *opens door to start his*

*is met with a taco to the face! Why always the face?!*

*falls to the ground, hands covering face*

"AH! HOT SAUCE IN MY EYES!"
Elouise Orlav 09/24/16 Those are perfect names! He's so smart, just like his favorite babysitter.
-pats herself on the back-
Elouise Orlav 09/24/16 Of course Noah can come! I hope he has 500 good names.
Elouise Orlav 09/24/16 -taps shoulder-
Since it's Saturday, I thought we have a nice, relaxing day.
-shifty eyes-
As soon as we dump the ant farm I bought all over Jameson's underwear drawer.
Khloe 09/23/16 *prances up and holds out a gift*
For my Cait because Jameson is a jerk-face and snatched your oranges.
Jameson Orlav 09/23/16 Gimmebackmytacoslady!!
Elouise Orlav 09/23/16 TNT would be more fun but... okay. Fine. Candle is it. Let's go!
-drags-
Elouise Orlav 09/23/16 -hops around-
And then we'll go get frozen yogurt!!
Elouise Orlav 09/23/16 Do you wanna go play in traffic together?
-sweet smile-
Sofia Johanneson 09/22/16 Fia didn't recall hearing any babies crying and was wondering where this child was hiding. "Ahhh he doesn't live in the kitchen, does he?
Jameson Orlav 09/22/16 He can't quite help the way his head tilts to the side. In an apparent display of anger and frustration, it would appear that Caitlyn was absolutely fuming from her ocular orifices. Jameson found it kind of confusing.. And also extremely interesting. He wondered, inwardly, how exactly that worked...

"Your ridiculous oranges." The man begins, brows both raised curiously over his invasive stare. "While I may have assumed that you'd be able to play along without tattling to miss pointy finger... You could have just asked if you wanted them back that badly."

A decisive frown pulls down at the corners of his mouth, twisting his face into an expression that was wild with bemusement.

"And then she starts spouting off about oranges, vitamin c and pregnancy. I thought to myself... Caitlyn? There's no way. I haven't heard a peep."

Now the frown seems to flip upside down. "Something you'd like to confirm or deny, maybe? Say, in exchange for the entire crop of your oranges?"

Did he just bribe a potentially pregnant lady? Yes. Yes he did.
Jameson Orlav 09/22/16 Jameson face contorts. Ever the grumpy Gus. The woman begins to flail around like one of those big, nylon monsters outside of a car dealership. Caitlyn screeches, and makes a big deal out of nothing. Women! (He'd have it printed on his gravestone).

"Caitlyn!" He snaps, hoping to draw her attention back to reality. Did he mean fat? No. But he's pretty convinced that everyone is conspiring sabotage against him.
Elouise Orlav 09/21/16
CAITLYNHELPIACCIDENTALLYSETEVERYTHINGONFIRE!!!
Jameson Orlav 09/21/16 "..What.." Jameson shakes his head, hands dropping from his hips as he takes a step forward. He's looking around, eyes darting as they often do when he's trying to be sure there were no unwelcomed parties privvy to their conversation. "Your friend Khloe paid me a visit."

The Doctor simply cannot help the eye roll that graced her name.

"But she said.. Well I didn't know... ANYWAY." Clearly unable to do words he instead points to her belly and eludes to the news that the girl had dropped on him.
Jameson Orlav 09/21/16 "Caitlyn Schwarzenegger Noire."

Jameson's hands fall to his hips while a testy foot taps impatiently against the cold floor. Yes, the man appears to be channeling his inner southern housewife.. Its a thing that happens when your entire existence has been encompassed by women.
"You've got some 'splaining to do."
Sofia Johanneson 09/20/16 Hmmm Fia didn't really smell the feet. -or- she was too used to the smell of dirt for it to bother her. How bad could it be, really? Still she didn't want to lose a chance to bond with her new crew-mate.

Love to have your company! I'm not the best cook indoors, I'm a little better around a campfire. You *do* have fire extinguishers, yes?

Fia gave an impish smile. She was kidding -- mostly.

Elouise Orlav 09/20/16 Wow. You're smart, and nice! You're definitely the better twin!
-shifty eyes-
I stole this from Jameson's room.
-removes orange from her pocket-
Sorry it's a little... squished.
Elouise Orlav 09/20/16
… Were you in my room last night?
Khloe 09/20/16 *gasps!*
He did WHAT?! Point me to this foul cretin who dared commit such a heinous crime against my dear Cait!
Khloe 09/20/16 Why do your feet smell like tacos? Do I want to know?
Camille Hammond 09/20/16 -le gasp-
The teary eyes; the wobbly lip. Wassa matter?!
-frowns-
Jameson Orlav 09/20/16 *grumps*
*drops video into an envelope to be delivered to Caitlyn*
*scribbles letter to go along with it*
Happy Taco Tuesday
Love, Dr. J and the Fruity Crew.

Sofia Johanneson 09/19/16 Fia was working to get acquainted with her new Home and those who also dwelt in it. Passing by the friendly citrus-lover she had to stop and comment.

"Hi again, everyone is so nice, and um, thanks for the warning. He does smell a bit... taco-ish. Kind of made me hungry."

She nods to the room at the end of the long hall where the kitchen was - her final destination. " I was thinking of heading out for groceries soon and was curious... pulp or no?"

Jameson Orlav 09/19/16 *creeps through profile*
*has an iPod with the pink panther theme song playing on repeat in his pocket*
*carefully evades all women*
Elouise Orlav 09/19/16 -smiles-
You're so smart.
-pats-
Elouise Orlav 09/19/16 Would you believe me if I told you Jameson was one-hundred and ten percent my b!tch?
Sofia Johanneson 09/19/16 Smiles at the offering and the warning.

Thank you for the sagely advice, I shall keep that in mind for future... interactions!

The juices doesnt actually "go" with the buttery popcorn still permeating her sharp senses but she gratefully washes it down anyways. She leans forward a bit curiously after looking around... "How will I know which one is..... Jameson?"

Jameson Orlav 09/15/16
Jameson Orlav 09/15/16
Elouise Orlav 09/13/16
Jameson Orlav 09/13/16 Let me show you...

Elouise Orlav 09/12/16 -bounces up and down-
And then after, we'll have ice pops! I'll even put all the orange ones aside for you!
Elouise Orlav 09/12/16 Oh, no. We're definitely burning his jackets. Just because I'm a morph-mom doesn't mean I can't have fun!
Elouise Orlav 09/12/16
Caitlyn! Look at Jameson and I’s morph baby! He takes after his father. We named him Trigger.
Jameson Orlav 09/12/16
Jason Reindhart 09/12/16 "Don't worry, I try not to eat humans too much. They give me some serious gas...however, a slight nibble here and there is nice."
Elouise Orlav 09/12/16 We should have a fire party! We can burn all of Jameson's leather jackets!
Jameson Orlav 09/12/16 It was actually Lamesons idea to start the war. He said to me:
'Jameson, if you take all the oranges, you'll be the ruler of the kingdom.'
+plus+, how can you master a fish taco without a spritz of citrus?!
Doctor Horrible 09/11/16 -Doctor Horrible jumps through the door and holds finger guns at Caitlyn.-

Pew Pew! Bang Bang! Whats up little miss Orange THANG

-Feels more awesome for doing that to the juice lady-
Jason Reindhart 09/10/16 "Thank you, miss."
Elouise Orlav 09/07/16 You're the wise older woman I've been looking for! Camille just keeps trying to fondle my eyeballs.
-leans in closer-
-whispers-
I think she's planning to steal them.
Elouise Orlav 09/07/16
Khloe 09/06/16 Khloe narrowly being avoided being dumped on her face again, this time by Caitlyn, through sheer luck alone, though the sudden impact onto her feet jarred all the way to her morals. The dismay was short-lived, however, outweighed by Cait’s confirmation of her condition – As if Khloe was wrong. Pah.

She was never wrong about such things.

“Wonderful! My timing is perfect. Now we can go shopping together and buy every little adorable baby thing we can find. Oh, we must also have a baby shower! Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl yet? Have you started to pick out names? I’ll help you decorate the baby’s room if you haven’t yet. This calls for a celebration! How bout Orange Julius? We’ll have a proper celebration later.” Khloe chattered away happily, oblivious to everyone else. Well, as much as she can get, anyway.

“You still look amazing, by the way, as if you could look anything but.” She flashed a beaming smile.

“I have one checked bag to fetch and then we can go.” Finally, Khloe gathered the bags she’d dropped and collected the other when it arrived as well.
Khloe 09/06/16 Khloe stood up on her tippy toes, trying to peer above the hordes of people also flooding from the security check-point at the airport. Spotting her favorite redhead in the entire world, she let out an excited squeal, “CAIT!

She hop-hopped… and promptly tripped on her luggage, sprawling face first in the middle of the crowd. “Sh*t!” Quick as a cat, Khloe sprang back up; pointedly ignoring (or not noticing) the looks directed her way.

“Caaait!” She waved enthusiastically, running the last few steps to envelop her friend in a long overdue hug. The various pieces of discarded luggage lay scattered at their feet. Blinking, Khloe pulled back, looked at Cait’s belly, back to her friend and then… “Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?!

No doubt the entire airport heard that particular screech.
Jameson Orlav 09/06/16
It appears that I have underestimated your gall, General Noire. My mistake. Game on. You'll never see your precious oranges again!
Jameson Orlav 09/06/16 *screams*
WHEREAREMYTACOS!???!!?!
Camille Hammond 09/06/16 Jameson is not going to be happy. I think he was having a fancy collar custom made for Lameson... It was his only friend. The tacos better not be cancelled!!!
Camille Hammond 09/05/16
I dunno, I think kitty looks more like a Meowncè!
Jameson Orlav 08/31/16 There she is. Unsuspecting. Jameson has her in his sights, and he's hidden safely behind the confines of some unnamed inanimate object. What a sight he is, this fool. Let's paint a picture:

Camouflage. Lots of it, wrapped around him in various forms of fabric. It covers his pants and his long sleeved henley, and the matching bandana tied around an unfastidious excuse for a head of hair.

And yes. There's paint. Streaks of mud colored warpaint dragged across his mug by dirty fingers.

He means to start a war.

Jameson is strapped, literally, with two criss-crossed holsters which are secured across his torso, and his artillery is heavy.

Super soakers. The likes of which are of a phenomenal caliber.

"Well, well, well," He spits, dramatically. Increasingly over the top as he drones on, "Finally we meet." What the hell is he on about?

At his sides, his weapons are drawn, meaty fingers on each respective trigger and ready to fire at any given moment.

"T'was I who took your precious oranges, and it is I who shall reign supreme over the citric kingdom!!"

Damn, he's lost it.

Just then, Jameson fires, taking aim at one of Solitudes most feared generals. From his guns, a never ending stream of brightly colored orange juice pours, spraying in all directions. The man sways back and fourth, like a scene straight out of Scarface. He yells, an outpour of warcries billowing from his lungs while he 'shoots' up the place.

There's probably a hint of maniacal laughter in there, too.
Camille Hammond 08/31/16
Oh God, what have I done...
Camille Hammond 08/29/16 butwhatif!!!
Camille Hammond 08/29/16 *whispers*
WHAT if there's an intruder?! OR WORSE!!
*shrieks*
A GHOST??
Camille Hammond 08/29/16 Cait, darling... Don't freak out... Camille's eyes widen, I found a trail of orange peels... But all of the oranges are gone!
Jackson McCarthy 08/13/16 Text to: Cait
Not that I can recall...but if they did I probably punched them in the face. Why do you ask?
vamp_goku 06/30/16
W_Kat 06/26/16 CONGRATS ON POTD!! :D
Jameson Orlav 06/07/16
Jameson Orlav 06/06/16 It looked a little more like..

But in my defense, it was taco Tuesday.
Jameson Orlav 06/06/16 Del Taco has security cameras... Don't ever let anyone convince you otherwise.
Jameson Orlav 06/05/16 Ironically enough, tacos were the entire reason I was in that mess!
Briahne 05/25/16 "Doing wonderfully well, how's your boy and you? it's good to see you again."
Briahne 05/25/16 "CAITLYN!!!" Smiles! "Hi."
Elouise Orlav 05/13/16 I am capable of behaving myself sometimes!
Jameson Orlav 05/10/16 They.. Uh.. They're heavier?
-cough-
Jameson Orlav 05/09/16 You know what? I think that's a solid yes. I can do a lot more damage with an orange than I can with a taco..
-Evil smirk-
Jameson Orlav 05/09/16 Complimentary?! You know, good tacos are hard to come by these days. Though I can proooobably be persuaded to whip something up!
Bastion Lennox 05/02/16 Thank you
Jameson Orlav 04/29/16 His first. First successful steal. The first time he had reached inside the pocket of an unsuspecting victim and hadn't been greeted with a mouse trap, or an angry lass with a pocket knife. Oh, and how sweet this victory felt.
You were successful in stealing $959.00 from Caitlyn Noire.
Yes.. Almost a thousand dollars. He would be feasting on tacos for months to come.
Jameson Orlav 04/29/16 *shakes head and gurgles*
*can't do words*
Livia Vlcek 04/28/16
Jameson Orlav 04/28/16 "Ho-ly sh_t.
Holy sh_t! That's the most pizza I've ever seen in my life.."

Jameson is on that mound of pizza boxes almost immediately, grasping at the edges of card boarded bliss in order to alleviate Caitlyn of the heavy load........ And then he's going to devour every single slice, even if it kills him.
Livia Vlcek 04/28/16 *looks over shoulder at the word Onix*
*sees Psyduck*
*trips while she laughs hysterically*
Livia Vlcek 04/27/16 *smacks Caitlyn with Mr. Mime* MR MIME I CHOOSE YOU!
*runs*
Jameson Orlav 04/27/16 Pizza. Pizza. Two syllables that, when used together, created a word so melodic that a sirens song would pale in comparison. Jameson fights back at the urge to feel excited, stomach growling as soon as the beautiful word rolls off of the woman's tongue. But then, she laughs awkwardly, and what comes next is a sort of 'haha, just kidding' that deals a blow to his hunger pangs.
"You- What- There's no pizza?!"
Livia Vlcek 04/27/16 *leans back from squinting eyes* Why...are you looking at me like that...*raises brows innocently*
Livia Vlcek 04/26/16 Oh yes, of course. *grins* I kid. I don't eat meat. Usually. *makes the face*
Jameson Orlav 04/26/16 Hell. Yes.
Livia Vlcek 04/26/16 *mocks contemplation* Are they edible? *is a vegetarian...she kids*
Livia Vlcek 04/26/16 *whispers quietly* Your house or mine?
Livia Vlcek 04/26/16 *pokes and whispers* I might need a plaster...maybe some orange juice.
Livia Vlcek 04/26/16 Right? *makes the face back*
Jameson Orlav 04/25/16 Good news..
Livia Vlcek 04/22/16 *laughs* No, no. I'll keep those under wraps. *blinks*
Livia Vlcek 04/18/16 *furrows brow* How long is 'awhile'...
*shakes head* Nevermind. I'll keep my scars.
Livia Vlcek 04/18/16 *cants head* Is that why you have such a youthful glow?
*ponders* Do they get rid of scars?
*grins*
Livia Vlcek 04/18/16 *catches and rolls around on the ground with* Not.hyper.at.all.
*loves on* Orange juice is delicious...especially from the trees you planted in my courtyard.
*shifty eyes*
Mackenzie 04/11/16
vamp_goku 04/01/16
Elouise Orlav 03/19/16 "Matches are harmless, thank you!"
Jackson McCarthy 03/16/16 Text to: Cait Uhhhh...I have NO idea where he got that from. But, uh, tell him I say hookers is not what we use to describe women. Ever. Because, I've totally never used that term before in my life. Ever.
*totally thinks that went over swimmingly*
Elessar 03/16/16 "I just need one bi enough to disappear into so I can be with my own thoughts." Elessar replies with a smile.
Elessar 03/14/16 "Fair to midland." Elessar says with a smile, then ask warmly, "Know anyplace where I can get myself an office?"
Jace Remington 03/13/16

"Because it's tasty..."
Elessar 03/13/16 "Tea not necessary, my friend." Elessar says warmly, then continues, "How's life treating you?"
Elessar 03/13/16 Offering Caitlyn some OJ, Elessar says warmly, "How are you?"
Elouise Orlav 03/12/16 "Feed them matches? No! Just diet soda and mentos."
Elouise Orlav 03/05/16 "I'm super good with kids! I babysat a little boy once. He just loved matches! Yeah! Totally didn't see him for the rest of the night."
*scratches head*
"Or ever again, for that matter... But then again, I guess your house burning down would upset anyone, am I right?"
*innocent smile*
Elouise Orlav 02/23/16 Not to toot my own horn, but MS Paint is my b*tch.
*beams*
Elouise Orlav 02/22/16 Look at your pretty face, plastered everywhere!
Sabina 02/22/16 Congratulations on being on the front cover, ma'am.
Briahne 02/22/16 "Caitlyn!!! Lookie lookie who's on the front page! Congratulations! ORANGE JUICE ALL AROUND!"
Camille Hammond 02/18/16 Text to: Cait
Message: Someone stole all of the juice. THE JUICE, CAIT. WHERE IS ALL OF THE ORANGE JUICE!

*twitches and presses send*
Jackson McCarthy 02/16/16 *Has a sudden orange craving*
*Raids Cait's fridge*
*Takes all the oranges*
*Runs away*
Jack Horton 02/13/16 So what's the first rule of Triplet Club?
Elouise Orlav 02/07/16 Of all orange, food related products, cheese is best.
Elessar 02/07/16 Hugging Caitlyn, Elessar says warmly, "Been too long since we ran together, my good friend."
Mercy Prescot 02/04/16 *Runs over and hides behind*

*Hands a bag of fresh oranges*

If a midget in a smoldering clown mask comes by and asks question...you saw nothing.
*Shifty eyes, innocent grin, then runs off* Enjoy the Oranges! Luff ya!
Adara Doe 02/03/16 *dies laughing* I am pretty sure that with John; he would just proclaim they were married and it would be so. *nods sagely*
Adara Doe 02/03/16 *squees* YOU ARE SO RIGHT!
Buutttt... *ponders* I have an idea!
*screams* WE SHOULD BUY AN ORANGE GROVE!
Raven Black 02/02/16 Raven smiled seeing it was her old leader and bowed her head "hello Caitlyn it's good to see you as well and I'm happy also."
Elouise Orlav 02/01/16 Oranges are sinfully delicious.. so there's bound to be some sort of punishment.
Elouise Orlav 02/01/16 So if you get orange juice in your eyes, do you go blind or does your body just absorb it for its nutrients?
Adara Doe 01/29/16 *Addie was overexcited*
*this was not normal*
*but she nearly tackled Caitlyn in her exuberance*

I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING! We totally NEED an ORANGE JUICE MOONSHINE! We have to get to work on that!!
Mercy Prescot 01/24/16 Sees the familiar face and grins as she approaches. "Long time no see boss. Good seeing you again...I believe I've something you'll enjoy..." Reaches into on of her jacket pockets and retrieves a flask, then offers it up. "It has oranges in it." Grins.
Solomon King 01/23/16 What?! No, they are not huggable bears. Y'know, unless you like getting your face mauled off and turned into bear dook. That's a yes to the OJ, though it's tough to get it fresh squeezed here in Moscow.. and please. I glimpsed The Room once.
...once.
Regginea MacFowlen 01/23/16 "I'd really like that actually. Perhaps we could set up a play date sometime and let our kids meet as well. My little Echo is almost 4 and doesn't have many kids even close to her age to play with." She offered Caitlyn a quick, but sincere, hug. "Let me know when you're free and we'll plan something out!"
Marah Boru 01/23/16 " Welcome to the Den. They say be scared of Bears but I like bears. If you ever want to hang out look me up." +grins+
Adara Doe 01/23/16 Now for wedding plans. Noah and Ella... 2036! Yaaaaaaay! *squishes*
Solomon King 01/23/16 Welcome to The Den! Things are pretty loosey goosey around here, but we have some very important rules. One of which is to keep a sharp eye out for bears. Another is to lock your cabin door at night, because Maggie sleepwalks.
*clears throat*
Also, this isn't really a rule, but.. if John invites you into his secret room? Just say no.
Regginea MacFowlen 01/23/16 Shade approached her old friend with a small smile. "Welcome to the Den! It's nice to see another familiar face around here. Of course you don't need any of my help, but I'll still be around."
John Doe 01/21/16 John Doe Fact #335: John Doe can resist assimilation, you can not. Resistance is futile.
Jackson McCarthy 01/20/16 It's cool, I'm here for ya, Cait.
John Doe 01/18/16 John Doe Fact #471: Orange juice concentrates on John Doe.
John Doe 01/18/16 John Doe Fact #712: When life hands John Doe lemons he makes orange juice.
John Doe 01/18/16 John Doe Fact #743: When John Doe wants orange juice he stares hard at a bag of oranges until they wet themselves.
John Doe 01/18/16 John Doe Fact #423: John Doe destroyed the periodic table, because John only recognizes the element of surprise.
Briahne 01/01/16 Happy New Year Pretty Wolfess.
Briahne 12/05/15 "Caitlyn!!! Thought I caught your scent around the realm. How've you been? How's your son? I have a pressie for him so please come by the house, you've not been there anyway. Great to see ya! Hugs!
Camille Hammond 10/12/15 Apples? Apples?! Oh, ew! #oranges4lyf #dontwantnoapples
Sprew 09/23/15 All mine
Briahne 09/21/15 To my favourite wolf: congrats on the front page chica! Looking great as always! Huggles!
lacigam 09/21/15 Grats on POtD! Hope you have a wonderful day! :)
Camille Hammond 09/21/15 Oooooh, look at that purrrdy face up all over the Realm! *winkwink*
Camille Hammond 08/06/15 But.... Can I eat it!?! *shifty eyes*
Camille Hammond 08/03/15 *tackles and luffs on*
Julliet Swan 07/19/15 As she stepped out of her apartment, she'd nearly fallen over the huge case that had been awaiting her. Jack! As she read the note, Julliet could barely contain herself. With great effort, Julliet pushed her large package into her living space before slamming the door closed behind her.

She was off to find Caitlyn.

Thankfully, she knew the girl well enough to know where to find her. Julliet nearly ran the entire way, but when she approached the house, she saw the orange lover outside. "CAIT!" She yelled as she came at Caitlyn with full running force and jumped on her, wrapping her limbs around the other woman's body, her heart racing with excitement, as she was sure Cait's was racing with a different kind of [off-guarded] excitement.
Camille Hammond 07/18/15 *nods* Yes, love kicks are fun. Or just kicks in genrral. Pow pow! Come back soon okay?
Solomon King 07/18/15 *spins around with a fangirl scream to rival a teenage girl's*
Ohmygod, where!?
Livia Vlcek 07/18/15 *grins* Oh yes...yes we can. Just say when. I'll be waiting with bells on. *plots*
Livia Vlcek 07/18/15 *stops crying* Oooo...I like that. *jumps up and attackles* Love you Cait. *snuggles*
Camille Hammond 07/18/15 Forced love tackles are the best kind! While you were gone there was an orange juice shortage. Now that you're back, we can jam it down the throats of unsuspecting citizens once again! *big grin*
Livia Vlcek 07/18/15 *rolls over onto back* Livlyn? I kinna like that...*ponders* But you'd be the cooler twin. *horror* I kissed your mom...we can't be twins. *cries harder*
Camille Hammond 07/18/15 *gasps* *chugs orange juice with lightning speed* *runs after and tackles* Is this real life!!? Don't run from my love!
Livia Vlcek 07/18/15 *ponders* I think I might have a jar of that...or can find some. *taps lower lip with index finger as she thinks* I do wash their little leaves off though. I keep them shiny and pretty! *cants head* When you coming home and reopening...I think some of yours got sick of me. I just can't replace you, to them! *cries* I'm not cool like you! *throws self to the ground all dramatic like*
Livia Vlcek 07/18/15 Thank Gods! I need more vegetables and fruits...I have too much meat in my diet. *coughs* I have your orange trees tucked away safe and secure in my courtyard. They miss you. *sniffles* They cry little tears...I try to comfort them.
Livia Vlcek 07/18/15 *screams!*
*attacks with love* You're back?!
Elessar 05/07/15 Walking by while sharpening his sword, Elessar says warmly as he tosses her a small pouch of orange juice, "War happens, and if it is my time to fight and die at your side, then I'll be here for you."
Camille Hammond 04/23/15 *eyes widen* Ooooh, it would be do pretty! Sparkle everywhere.... *chuckles"
Camille Hammond 04/21/15 *squeezes out a few fake and not at all overly dramatic tears* Wow, I can't believe this! I'll smack him right in the juice drinker!!!! *Shifty eyes*
Camille Hammond 04/21/15 *stares* UMMM, I know you didn't have some secret wedding without inviting me?! *lip wobbles*
Solomon King 04/04/15 For a moment, he was almost affronted. Who didn’t know about Emma f*cking Stone?! Quirky redhead goddess of romcoms? However, he quickly took comfort in her ignorance, for at least she wouldn’t know that he, a rugged, gloriously bearded Paul Bunyan lookalike, probably liked Crazy, Stupid, Love more than any other movie ever.

“You don’t? Oh, don’t worry about it,” He waved his hand nonchalantly, taking a napkin to his own shirt. “And yeah, I’m fine, thanks for asking. I’m really sorry about that.” Quickly taking note of her appreciation for orange juice, he moved to make amends. “Maybe I could buy you a glass of OJ to make it up to you? Or.. maybe money for the drycleaners?” He smiled sheepishly, clearly embarrassed over his mishap.
Solomon King 04/04/15 Solomon was just coming out of a coffee shop, iced coffee in hand, when he glanced left and saw a lovely redhead sitting at a table, sipping at a caffeinated beverage of her own.

Wait. Was that..?

He made the mistake of watching her for a second too long, and someone accidentally shoulder checked him, sending both him and his icy beverage flying into the poor girl. The coffee landed all over both of their shirts, though he managed to catch himself on her table before he completely fell on his guilty face.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry! You just.. I thought you were, uh..” He grabbed at some napkins on the table, thrusting them at her in horror, and failing to fake a reason for his little accident. “..uh.. I’m sorry, I thought you were Emma Stone.”

Damn him and his celeb crushes.

How embarrassing.
Elessar 02/13/15 Smiling gently, Elessar replies as he reaches into his robes, "I am doing fine. I have better days. As for the tea, not to worry, I always seem to have some hidden nearby.
Elessar 02/12/15 Stepping from the shadows, Elessar offers Caitlyn some OJ as he says warmly, "Long time no see, my beloved dear. How are you?"
Sprew 02/06/15 I have Deeeeeeep pockets for a reason..
Mercy Prescot 01/31/15 *Smiles and nods* Sure, I'd love to. But only if I can Irish mine up?
Mercy Prescot 01/29/15 Oh boss lady! *appears with an impish grin* I was robbing...er um...visiting a store when I found something I think you'll appreciate. *Hands sealed bag of chocolate coffee beans*
Mercy Prescot 01/25/15 Thanks boss, yeah I'd like to come home...kinda miss placed my key though, *shifty eyes* I think the undertaker stole it.
Nathaniel Tallios 01/20/15 Nathaniel ran up to Caitlyn quickly, standing in front of her. "Okay, don't hit me or hate me or anything but there's something I need to be sure of." The next thing that happened... well... no one really saw it coming. Nathaniel grabbed the werewolf and pulled her into a brief kiss. When he pulled away he thought for a moment. "Yep... just like I thought. It's like trying to kiss one of my sisters." He then shuddered a bit in horror as he let Cait go. "Okay, well... let's pretend like that awkward moment didn't happen and move on." Nathaniel then walked away, rubbing the back of his neck.
Camille Hammond 01/15/15 My, what a beautiful singing voice you have!

>.>

*confetti bombs*
Camille Hammond 01/07/15 *stares at new profile* Ooooooh, pretty!!
Raven Black 01/02/15 Raven heard about her leader having POD and walked up to her and smiled "Congrats"
Camille Hammond 01/02/15 POD!!! WOOOOOOOO *throws glitter everywhere*
Dr Van Helsing 12/28/14 Greetings Miss Noire
Julliet Swan 12/22/14 At the mention of Jack, Julliet couldn't help but smirk as she temporarily removed the cancer stick from her lips and let it rest between two fingers. How could she have nearly forgotten? "Jack sounds just fine." She replied as she slipped an arm around Caitlyn's waist and began to walk back towards the sanctuary headquarters. "I bet your office would do just the trick." She insisted happily.
Julliet Swan 12/18/14 The blonde embraced her leader in her arms graciously. It felt wonderful to be back. "I just had to take care of some things..." She whispered as she rubbed her cheek against the smooth surface of Caitlyn's hair. "I'm sorry I didn't give you much warning." Her own pale blue eyes fought back some extra tears. She slowly pulled away, her limp arms dropping to her sides before her hands began fumbling around in her pockets. "I could use a drink. Join me?" She asked as she slipped a cigarette between her lips and lit it quickly.
Julliet Swan 12/16/14 She cleared her throat before twirling a strand of blonde lock around a finger. She leaned in and questioned in a soft voice, "Miss, can you show me around? I must have lost my way." Her shiny pink lips curved up into a playful smirk as her blue eyes glimmered with subtle excitement.
Connor Silverman 12/11/14 Connor grinned a little as he left a small gift basket for the werewolf. There was an assortment of orange related items: orange spice tea, orange cranberry muffins, orange juice and even oranges themselves in the basket. "Congratulations on Profile of the Day Caitlyn."
Briahne 11/29/14 "Good idea Cait, one bowl and glass of OJ coming right up!"
Briahne 11/23/14 Bri rushes to her friend with the newspaper. "Lookie who's on the front page! SQUEEEEEEEEEE! Congrats Cait!!"
Livia Vlcek 11/05/14 *makes the face*
River Song 10/10/14 And The Doctor scoffs at me being an archaeologist! *signs her orange* I think I'm doing just fine!
Nathaniel Tallios 10/02/14 Nathaniel snuck into Caitlyn's office with a handful of tools as he leaned in a bit front of her desk and got to work. "I put this here... and this there..." He whispered softly to himself, knowing he was there in the room by himself. By the time he was finished, he had set up a basket full of oranges on the werewolf's desk but underneath was the real present: A plastic container of apple juice rigged to explode and cover whoever picks an orange off the pile. "I love ya and all Cait but I gotta get back into my pranking ways. I can't get rusty." He chuckled a bit to himself as he grabbed the rest of the stuff he brought and quickly went on his way, making sure everything else was exactly where it was.
Jackson McCarthy 09/27/14 Paperwork. Good lord. He’d never signed his name so many times. The only thing he was familiar with was the look the officer gave him when he pulled out Caitlyn’s bail in cash. He obviously didn’t look like the type that actually worked for his money…Well, not the kind of work they believed in. Jackson wasn’t cut out for the whole nine to five deal. And for a moment, Jackson worried the officer may just haul him into a room and question him. Instead, he shrugged, processed the payment and told Jack to hang tight while Cait went through the process of being released.

Finally, she emerged, looking like they had put her through the ringer in the short time she was there. It was disheartening to not see her being her bubbly self. “Don’t mention it. I’d come rescue you anytime. Makes me feel useful,” he smiled, attempting to lighten her mood. He wasn’t good with crying females and he could see tears in her eyes.

C’mon, let’s get out of here. I’ll take you wherever you want to go. And maybe you’ll let me in on just how you managed to get yourself locked up.” Jackson rested his hand on the small of her back, and placed a soft kiss to her temple before he led them out to the parking lot. They reached his bike, he got on and held out his hand to help her on, "Hop on, love."
Jackson McCarthy 09/23/14 Why couldn't Eden be here to deal with the emotional part of this issue? He would do what he could to help Cait, after all, she was who he went to when he finally returned. Aside from Eden, she was the only one he'd known for longer than a few months. They once ran Lune together. That wasn't a relationship he could turn his back on. But the emotions just weren't his strong point. Knowing him, he'd probably end up saying something to make the situation worse. So he chose not to say too much yet.

"It's okay.." he spoke softly.

Once at his bike, and waiting to see where he had to go, he popped open a compartment on the bike and grabbed a cigarette and a lighter. He heard Cait asking someone where she was as he lit the stick and inhaled. A sound of the receiver being moved and a gruff voice was on the other end now

California State Prison. And the line went dead.

Did the moron not realize there were about five prisons that identified themselves as California State? Checking back at the number she called from, he realized then why the number seemed familiar. The area code was for the next city over. Which, hopefully, meant she was in Los Angeles. He'd be there in just under an hour if he ignored the speed limits.

Once there and getting through the ridiculous amounts of security, he was lead to where he could sort things out.

"Can I help you?" A middle aged man was sitting behind a glass window asked when Jackson approached. He apparently drew the short straw.

"I'm here to bail out Caitlyn Emerson."
Jackson McCarthy 09/23/14 He recognized her voice immediately, without her even having to say. But she sounded off. So unlike her usual self. Still, the sound of her voice was a breath of fresh air. The only voices he heard lately were of the guys he fought or the skanky girls that hung around the fights, hoping to go home with one of the fighters--preferably one that hadn't been beat.

The brief smile that had graced his features dropped as she kept talking. She was trying to remain composed, yet he could tell she wasn't lying when she told him she was scared. He was already getting a shirt on and shoes, skillfully keeping the phone against his ear and spoke to her as he dressed, "It's going to be fine," he hoped he sounded calming enough. He wasn't exactly skilled in this department..luckily she wasn't scared of him."If any of them hurt you, you remember who they are and I'll deal with them when I get there."

Jackson grabbed his keys once he was dressed and was all ready out the door, heading to his motorcycle. "Do you know where you are?"
Jackson McCarthy 09/23/14 The days lately blurred together. He didn't know if it was a Monday or a Friday, but frankly, he didn't care. His life had a routine again, eat, drink, fight, drink, sleep. Rinse and repeat. Even trips to Cancun didn't help him much. It was worse there than it was out here. Regardless, it had been months since Eden had disappeared and this time, there was no finding her. She didn't leave anything behind. He never really thought things would progress the way they had, but he should have known something would happen. It always did. They had a toxic relationship and somehow, something always tore them apart. This time, he was finding it hard to move on.

Passed out on the couch, the shrill ringing of his phone pulled him out of his coma. He searched the table for it blindly, and came up empty. "Sh*t.." Sitting up, he felt the phone in his pocket and pulled it out with the intention of hitting end and going back to sleep. But something about the number made him hit accept.

There was some mumbo about accepting charges for the call. He muttered a yes, and was connected through to the caller, "Hello?"
Armando Ramirez 08/14/14 Stepping out of the kitchen hearing Caitlyn's growling then crying out his name, Armando all but ran toward her wondering what in the h3ll was going on. After skidding to a stop, his black biker boots screeching on the floor beneath him, he looked to her then the jar then back again. ”Oh ****!! How could this have happened? NOOO!! The horror of it all! What criminal mastermind would do such a devious and sadistic thing as this?”
Jackson McCarthy 08/13/14 *goes to wash hands*
*smells the booze*
*looks around*
*drinks straight from tap*
Jackson McCarthy 08/10/14 Rum friends?
*ponders* Did she kidnap people?
*wouldn't put it past her*
*goes to get a drink*
*realizes, belatedly, what she meant*
*figures she's long gone by now*
*plots her demise*
Jackson McCarthy 08/10/14 *blinks* Oww..
*picks up orange*
*calls after her* "Gee..Thanks!"
Livia Vlcek 08/04/14 But...It's gonna be so tiny just on chur face. *blinks* How about a back piece! *runs to grab tattoo gun*
Livia Vlcek 08/01/14 *lifts brow* You dun want Starry night painted on you? *makes the face*
Livia Vlcek 08/01/14 *gasps* It's even the right color! *snicks* Ima paint Starry Night on you...*plots on where to start*
Livia Vlcek 08/01/14 *scribbles on so she isn't blank*
*draws hearts and stuffs on her*
*a little unicorn*
*maybe a carebear*
*has a brilliant idea*
*trots off looking for her oil paints*
x Nerull x 06/09/14 *Snickers* "Oh my...nobody's touched me like that in centuries" *Cackles*
Julliet Swan 06/05/14 *gets a running start*
*pounces on*
*loves forever*
Elessar 06/03/14 Dusting himself off from the whipping he just got, Elessar says with a warm smile, "Nice hit there you got, Cait...next time, maybe you give me a chance to hit you back."
Briahne 04/30/14 Briahne bounces all around Caitlyn, "lookie lookie who made the front page!" Congorats darlin!
Eden McCarthy 04/15/14

You did what? With what?
Eden McCarthy 04/13/14 The feels when all the girls keep hitting on your man:
Eden McCarthy 04/12/14 *watches from afar, creeper style*
Livia Vlcek 04/09/14 Livia looked at the bottle similar to the one she had given Caitlyn. The contents were orange however and the Slayer figured the orange obsessed Lycan had probably gifted her some of the woman's special orange juice. Which, of course, was awesome. Livia like orange juice and Caitlyn's was like, off limits to the world. With a meek smile and nod, Livia slipped the bottle into her coat pocket.

"About 1035am..." Her brow furrowed. "And yes, I spend most of my time training. Nothing else to do with Ryan gone all the time." She gave a small laugh. "But, thank you very much. I can't wait to try the OJ!"
Roman Pierce 04/08/14 HURRY HURRY!
Briahne 04/08/14 Oofs, luckily the blood she carries from her own family and long dead mate has helped ... a lot! "God Cait, I am still reeling from all of this. It just happened so fast..." The Romanian hugged her closely just like she did with Phoebe and Miya. "Thank you so much for being there for me, for us." Bri wipes tears of relief away.
Nathaniel Tallios 04/08/14 "Yeah, I guess I'm lucky... if you could call it that. It would have been better if someone else were here with us."
Roman Pierce 04/06/14 Depends...How much do you have?
Roman Pierce 04/06/14 Thankies...and no can do, I NEED MOAR!
Livia Vlcek 04/05/14 *stares at bottle of soy milk*
*is unsure what to do with it*
*takes to Caitlyn's house for Noah*
*pours tons of sugar in it on the way*
*deposits bottle on table with a note*
Cait-

Eden left this bottle of soy milk for me but I have allergic reactions to soy products. Gluten free, should be great for the wee one, Noah.
heart
Liv
Eden McCarthy 04/01/14 *runs car through Lune's front windows*

Oops... I think I missed the driveway...
Eden McCarthy 04/01/14 *falls on*
Eden McCarthy 03/27/14 *just stares*
Jackson McCarthy 03/26/14 *Drapes an arm over her shoulders*
Oh, you know me..Here and there.
*Hands her the orange* Knock yourself out.
Keeping out of trouble while I've been gone?
Eden McCarthy 03/26/14 "I do not like them with in a house, I do not like them with a mouse. I do not like them anywhere.... lord I'm not reading your kid anymore Dr. Seuss!"

*avoids subject*

No, I think he'll be really happy at the farm... don't need another cat.
Jackson McCarthy 03/25/14 *Blinks*
*Muffled talking*
*Spits out orange*
Well, hello to you too!
Eden McCarthy 03/25/14 "Um, I don't need any oranges. I still have some left from the last one. I really don't like oranges. No I really couldn't it smelled bad I think Mr. Tinkles peed on it."
Eden McCarthy 03/25/14 "So, I threw away that left over orange chicken, it was growing little creatures on it. There was also a baby doll in Noah's room that was dressed in orange, it smelled horrible. I tossed that out to."
Eden McCarthy 03/25/14 You will love it! You need something to get you away form the orange

*thinks*

The cat went to live on a farm...
Eden McCarthy 03/25/14 "You can never make it up to me! But don't worry, I painted your room pink while you were gone. And no, he ran away."
Eden McCarthy 03/25/14 "I shall not forgive you." *sniffles* "You left me alone with nothing but my Tangerine walls to talk to, and that stu-- lovely cat."
Eden McCarthy 03/24/14 You Miss Noire are an abandoner!!!

Next time I will throw all your oranges away!
Roman Pierce 03/13/14 Thanks
Briahne 01/25/14 Her cell bounced lightly on the kitchen counter, it was Caitlyn answering back. Smiling thinking out loud..... am I ready.... silly question. Briahne texts back to her. "My place, 6:00pm, don't worry about Drake. I'm making dinner and I even have a high chair for Noah!" Once she was satisfied with what she wrote, the happy girl hit send.
Briahne 01/24/14 Bri texts her friend .. Sooo, when you coming over? I want to meet Drake! Noah's got his Christmas gifts over here still ... *bribes you with Orange Juice from California?*
Livia Vlcek 12/25/13 Merry Christmas Cait and Noah! *scoops Noah up* Did Santa bring you everything you wanted for Christmas? *winks at Cait*
Briahne 12/25/13 Thank you Thank you for the Christmas card! Look at Noah trying to write! I hope St. Nicklaus brought him lots of toys and good things for him and for you my dear friend!
Elessar 12/25/13 Smiling as he approaches Caitlyn, Elessar says with a warm smile as he offers her a small package, "Merry Christmas."
Elessar 12/14/13 Sneaking into Cait's office, Elessar places oranges around the room and laces a glass of orange juice on her desk. Smiling, Elessar sneaks out hoping he doesn't get caught.
Livia Vlcek 11/23/13 *nods* I threaten them with not visiting you...*sways* And they use it against me.
Livia Vlcek 11/23/13 Patron is such a great chaser for Red Bull. *hiccups* The Frenchies said they missed you. *wobbles* I brought them to visit...*whispers* they demanded it.
Livia Vlcek 11/18/13 I...*laughs* I don't know what to say about my husband's shoe.
*blinks* Tell them to start using the toilet to do their business and they can have Italian ice three times a day.
*cants head* I don't think any of the shops are open that long to have it five times a day...
Livia Vlcek 11/16/13 SO!!! *shifty eyes* Wait...
*ponders* It's going to be after midnight somewhere...so how that works, iunno.
*thinks hard* Is that midnight GMT +8 or -8?
*cries* I'm so confused!
*redirects attention back to the 'deal'* Tell them they can have it once a week or I will have to brush their teeth five times a day.
*grins* OR...they have to learn to use the toilet and the water pick to receive Italian ice five times a day.
Livia Vlcek 11/16/13 *shifty eyes* I used to have pugs but um...they kept eating the pastries and turned into French Bulldogs.
*scowls* They are costing me a FORTUNE.
*hands Caitlyn half the herd, pride, gaggle* You like them hm?
*cants head* Just tell them to stahhhhhhp eating the pastries and to not eat any paint. *blinks*
Livia Vlcek 11/16/13 *walks her herd, pride, gaggle of french bulldogs towards Caitlyn*
*lets out exasperated sigh-sniffle*
THEY KEEP EATING MY FRENCH PASTRIES!
*raises arm to forehead in 'woe is me' pose*
Briahne 11/14/13 "CAITLYN!!!!!" Waves her hand ....."Just wanted to say Hi."
Valentin Metzger 11/02/13 Soulless eyes, blue green in color, stared emotionless at the redhead. What did he seek? His heart, a painting.. His girls. The German's head tipped back as he inhaled deeply, thin flesh of his lids closing briefly while thoughts of the two flitted through his head. One with mossy green eyes, the other with eyes that mirrored his own. One an art thief, the other a killer. A cruel smile pulled at his mouth. They had been so proficient at their skills, yet, both had failed their 'jobs' assigned and disappeared off the grid. Yes, they had kept in contact but they never returned 'home' for longer than a day and always demanded public meetings.

"I seek what is mine." Baritone voice responded abstractly, he couldn't divulge the plan. The risk was too great. He would seek them, find them and take them home where they belonged. "But I thank you for your attempt to assist."
Valentin Metzger 11/02/13 "Danke." An arm crossed over his chest until a large fist rest over his heart. "I will keep that in mind, if I cannot find what I seek."
Livia Vlcek 10/31/13 Happy Halloween! *hugs*
Livia Vlcek 10/27/13 *notices the strength in which she throws the box*
*squeezes Cait's bicep*
Ooooo...you got stronger!
*screams in horror as the box bounce off*
You're supposed to wait until I light him on fire!
Livia Vlcek 10/26/13 *eyes widen*
*fumbles for the chocolate bar in her knapsack while the other hand looks for her Zippo*
*screams at Cait* GO GET GRAHAM CRACKERS!!! THAT'S ONE HELLUVA SMORE WALKIN OUR WAY!!!
Livia Vlcek 10/03/13 *gasps* They are so pretty...I do not want to eat them. *blinks* Thank you Cait!
Livia Vlcek 09/29/13 *huffs* Iunno!!He took my skinny jeans too. The Prada ones!*scowls*

Am I gonna be your mom?! Wha?!?! NO! Wait...how does that work? If your mom kissed me...and your dad is wearing my clothes...*blinks* I...I just don't know Cait. *ponders deeply*
Livia Vlcek 09/29/13 It was awful Cait!
*lip wobbles* Your dad filled my bra better than I did!
*shifty eyes* I think...
*moment of realisation* Erm...
*screams* OH MAH GAH!!! YOUR MOM KISSED ME!!
Livia Vlcek 09/29/13 *nods*Yea...your dad is cool...he um...was wearing my bra. *cringes*
*blinks* Your mom wouldn't happen to be blonde, would she?
*eyes glaze over* With pretty blue eyes and very bowed lips?
Livia Vlcek 09/29/13 *glances down at shirt and nods* It's all I could find to wear at the Club.
*pouts* People have taken my clothes...
*glances up at Caitlyn* So um...Briggs is your dad?
Livia Vlcek 09/29/13 *wanders up in an 'I love hot moms' tee-shirt*
*stares at wide eyed*
Livia Vlcek 09/24/13 CAIT!!! *screams* CAIT!!! *racks a round* You sent that damn Scyther to fvck up my hair... Didn't you?!
Roman Pierce 09/11/13 *stares*
*Will haunt and murder you*
*sage nod*
Roman Pierce 09/11/13 *stares*
Ermmm...
*guzzles*
*twitches*
*dies*
Livia Vlcek 09/08/13
*is hit with sweaty jogger...ew germs*
*gasps in surprise...ew germs*
*scrambles for freedom from jogger...ew germs*
*grabs nearest item she can get her hands on*
*tosses bottle of half drank orange juice at Cait* Pony...ta! Tear dat bish up! Erg...I mean, I choose you!
*searches for purrell*
Livia Vlcek 09/08/13 *is hit with hotdog butterfree*
*falls*
*HO DOWN!*
*grabs fallen bun*
*throws at Cait* Venomoth, I choose you!
Livia Vlcek 09/08/13
Livia Vlcek 08/26/13 *gasps and tries to cuddle*
*falls upon*
*instantly falls asleep*
Livia Vlcek 07/10/13 *nods* Went to the gelatto shop. Took lil Roman after we got him some batman plasters for his knee. Kid can eat. *holds out bag with multiple cups of gelatto in different flavors*
Livia Vlcek 07/10/13 *calls after Cait* Waaaaaiiiit! *runs after* I went to the gelatto shop!
Phoebe Eriksen 06/26/13 The air about Phoebe was different. She had been away for a very long time to detox herself from the Realms torrid drama. Her hand pulled upon the ribbon that kept her hair up in a high pony tail letting it cascade down all about her shoulders. "Yes, its me Caitlyn. I thought I would be forgotten totally around here." She stuffed wrapped the ribbon around her wrist while taking slow deep breaths "So what have I missed?
Briahne 06/18/13 Bri sets down a box of Oranges with a huge sign that says Grats on POTD!!!, rings the doorbell, then knocks ...then darts away grinning like a cheshire cat.
Nathaniel Tallios 06/18/13 Well, well, well! Look who's made it onto the front page! Remind me to buy you a fresh gallon of OJ to celebrate!
Elessar 06/13/13 Appearing out the crowd, Elessar has a gallon of ice cold orange juice in one hand and a gallon of amber liquid that also appears to be ice cold as he says, "Hey, Cait."
Livia Vlcek 05/02/13 *falls flat on her face as the bald bystander hits her*
*lifts head up*
*attempts to figure out what exactly has happened*
*stars stars stars*
*shrugs off the male and yells*
DAD GET OFF YOU'RE CRUSHING MAI SMOKES!
*blinks* Um...oops...
*shifty eyes*
DidIsaythatoutloud?
*jumps up and grabs nearest Lycan*
HOUNDOOM I CHOOSE YOU!
*tosses at Caitlyn and runs like the wind*
Livia Vlcek 04/22/13 *tries to wipe dirt from eyes...still*
*is knocked backwards with sheer force of cat hitting face*
*screams like a girl*
*clutches at animal that is attached to said face and flails wildly on ground*
*manages muffled words* Ohmahgah Caitlyn!!!
*flings cat to the side*
*grabs random vampire walking by and flings at Cait* GOLBAT I CHOOSE YOU!
*blinks* Erg...*attempts to crawl away on hands and knees quickly*
Elessar 04/17/13 Being bumped into, Elessar turns around and says as he wraps his arms around his friend Caitlyn, "Cait, you caught up with me, my friend. How are you?"
Livia Vlcek 04/17/13 *screams in pain as dirt clouds her vision*
*claws at eyes*
*blindly searches for a rock*
*throws dog poo found at Cait*
Onix! I choose you!
*scrunches nose*
What's that smell...
Livia Vlcek 04/15/13 *watches Caitlyn fall*
*blinks*
Whadaeff?
*crawls towards the woman's body*
I really think we need to have you fit for shoes...or summin. Maybe have your robe tailored more?
*picks ice off herself*
*tosses at Caitlyn*
*screams* PIKACHU! I CHOOSE YOU!
Livia Vlcek 04/15/13 *is hit*
*screams*
I'M HIT! I'M HIT!
*falls to the ground*
Elessar 04/01/13 Smiling as he looks at the baby and places a finger into the grasp of Noah, Elessar says, "Hey there, little. How are you?" Looking At Caitlyn, he continues, "He's got a grip. I am doing fine."
Elessar 04/01/13 Sneaking up behind Caitlyn, Elessar covers her eyes and says quietly, "Surprise!"
Roman Pierce 03/18/13 Congorats...now gimme the f*cking juice!
Briahne 03/16/13 She smiles, holding the newly born Noah in her arms ....she hoped she was holding him right, her mother didn't let her help with her sister much. This was all too new for her. "How'm I doing ..... God Caitlyn, is so hard. He gave me the cross I wear now, it say "Forever bound in love -Your Hunter"." The girl is close to tears, fighting them back hard ... "even his wolf in full crinos form loved me. God gave him the wolf, something lead us to each other, how could ...... why he take him from me?" She wipes away the invading tears and tries to smile again. Seeing little Noah's face helps. "Uhm, orange juice ....dah, please and you more than welcome for gifts, I hope you like them." Strange things happen to people in the realm all the time, she had hoped that they had as much time as many of the others did. "I not help but thinken that this was same vampire that took me, only instead of forcing promise, he killed my mate. Dah, I need to go back soon. Maybe we close investigation and Fane take farm and rebuild. Is not home there anymore, London my home now. You come over to house one day, is plenty of room and Noah can play ....." Briahne catches herself rambling again ...her smiles turns soft as she gazes at the child again. "You have godparents for him yet? Is said in my homelands, child with godparents will never be out of love, ever."
Briahne 03/14/13 The Romanian girl hugs her good friend back, with one arm as well, since she bears her gifts with the other hand. She moves in through her doorway, smiling softly at the infant in her arms. "Caitlyn, he's so beautiful", she say placing her hand on her chest. "You are very lucky to have him." Bri's eyes are filled with sadness even though she expresses true joy for Cait's lil one. She sets his gift and hers down to where Momma can look at them in hopes to be able to hold Noah. "May I hold him please?"
Briahne 03/13/13 Briahne discovered from Caitlyn's text that she too was in London ... she invited the Romanian to visit her. She does this now. Knocking on the door to where she is, already having been to a gift shop for the baby Noah, Bri waits to be admitted so that she might be able to stay her screams and tears for at least a little while. Children are precious and Caitlyn was blessed with her son. She was dressed in all black, but not a dress or a skirt ... pants, boots and a sweater that was nicely low cut without being advertisingly so. She wished for her mate's cross's diamonds to shine and shimmer, showing all that he protected her still, even from underneath the dirt. Her present to little Noah was a slightly larger sleeper/blanket set with a simple white rose for Caitlyn and a small basket of oranges for her too. With that blanket set is a rattle, it had been hers, non-descript for at first Bri was thought to be a Brian .... neighbors from her homeland made it and now, it belonged to Cait's little one.
Elessar 02/24/13 You are more than welcome to come over to my house at any time, Cait. I have enough OJ for you to quench your thirst all the time, as you are more than welcome there.
Roman Pierce 02/20/13 THE HELL WITH THAT, IT'S ALL MINE...GIMME!
Elessar 02/17/13 Sure would love to have some OJ!! Yo can always get a few dozen oranges over at my house. I am doing fine. How about you?
Elessar 02/17/13 Hey, my beloved and beautiful friend!
Livia Vlcek 02/01/13 What's it gonna take to shed four years? I want it to be four years ago...*hands Cait a bottle of OJ*
Actives (24) Fresh Blood (4) View All The Fallen (0) Graveyard
Elessar, Robert Sonder, Kate Pearson, Prince John, Cheryl Blossom, En Sabah Nur, Jughead Jones, Beth Pearson, Fall, Frankie Sonder, Randall Pearson, Llewyn Davis, Dark 3, Veronica Lodge, Poe Dameron, Coyote Sonder, Kevin Pearson, The Babysitter, Orangesrlife, Dark 5, Abel Morales, Dark 2, Betty Cooper, Jack Pearson  Diego Kaspar
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